sad
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My love given was not reciprocated
Gave you my all, only left with blank pages
Feelings expressed and not understood
Enough circular conversations and dead ass communication
When you feel that your feelings are so heavy and want to write but can’t find the words then you’ll know me
Out of everyone else, with you it hurts the most,
Because this was the first time in my life where it felt like we were getting close.
As much as I don't want to say those words to you,
“Why are you upset?
Why are you so angry?”
You never treat me fairly
Or kindly for that matter
Oh great I’m fu***** crying
And just like that, I found myself in the same situation once again,
Torn between cutting you out of my life, or keeping you around as just a friend.
You can't tell me that you didn't think of me the same way,
Silly me for thinking that you felt the same,
And for believing in love, but I know that I am the only one to blame.
You think I would have learned my lesson by now,
But once again, I am left here wondering 'how?'
Clouds roll in
As darkness falls
electricity dances over my skin
And the voice in the void calls
I scream out to reach you
Eyes deeper than the greatest forest They stare into my very soul. with the knowledge of the wisest sage. Dragging me back from the deepest hole.
Please be careful, we're very fragile. Not fragile like a flower,or like a bomb, But like a splashingwine glass, in the handsof a drunk, or a glistening glass pane, packaged by a careless worker. Glass hearts protectedby stone walls,flames dying t
And just like that, three months have gone by,
And I didn’t think it would be this hard to say goodbye.
But there is not a day that doesn’t go by that I don’t think about you,
I have heard people say that they were going through Hell,
And most of the time, they didn’t need to say anything, and you were able to tell.
In a world of darkness,
I am always told that the light will prevail.
Through moments of uncertainty,
What guides you will never fail.
Four years since the day that I have found out your name,
Four years since I have never been the same.
Four years since the first time I saw that smile,
You ruined love for me,
Because you made me feel like I could finally have everything that I dreamed it could be.
You found me when I was in the darkest place,
I am the worst person in the world because I am ruining life and not living to my potiental.
Everyone says that it will get better.
But i'm starting to get impatient.
I wrote this poem because i heard you're leaving
i know it's true but i hope that i am dreaming,
so i am asking you one more time please dont leave me.
It's a long shot
Some David and Goliath shit
If Goliath were a whole damn city
And everyone bet on David losing
And David showed up to the fight refusing
But I'll do it
As hard as it would be to hear it, sometimes I wish you would just have the guts to say how you feel,
Because you and I both know that it is what is real.
I know you want to tell me to leave you alone,
The dark green leaves swaying above us, as the wind softly blows.
The water ripples, making soft lapping sounds at the shore.
The geese puff up their feathers, squawking and flapping wildly.
The scent of sporadically yellow, acidic-rotten lemons
with a hint of fresh peppermint leaf in the air
In the bright summer of ‘82,
the beaming light of the sun grazes upon
The scent of sporadically yellow, acidic-rotten lemons
with a hint of fresh peppermint leaf in the air.
In the bright summer of ‘82,
Today I fell on the floor weeping bitterly
No, it’s not like the other days i had cried for some silliness you always do that I had known of
This was actually uncontrollable tears
5 months, trading kisses in my car
Your hands tracing hearts around my arms
Our lives, we knew would never be the same
Oh why’d you have to go and change
4 weeks, that’s all it took for me to fall
I tell my therapist I think I am incapable of love
At least not with someone who will love me back
And maybe I learned it from my mother
Or the father who couldn’t love me even if he wanted to
And I don’t blame you
I remember when you said
you couldn’t love me
And at the time I was heartbroken
Beside myself with arrogant disbelief
But the truth is
I didn’t need you to love me
Another year older
Another day colder
The heat went out again this year,
Almost like a tradition
I’m single again
Almost certainly a tradition
And the pipes have burst
Depression is like a record player
With a new record every week
and it’s always scratched
Right at the saddest chorus
With all the saddest chords
Those who never pleased the lord
5 months, trading kisses in my carYour hands tracing hearts around my armsOur lives, we knew would never be the sameOh why’d you have to go and change4 weeks, that’s all it took for me to fallYour smile I wish I could forget it allYour laugh’s for
You had me at first glance
You gave me more than just a chance
You lit a fire in me that I can never defuse
You the artist became my muse
My slow reflectionwill be torn by desirewhen she looks at me.
She whispers my nameand I hear her voicethrough the mists of oblivion
We fell in love in late spring
As cool wind nipped at our cheeks
we found warmth in each others bodies
Our love blossomed into the summer
Hot, sunny days
Walking trails hand in hand
I think I lost myself, again Because here I am, fondling the sheets at 3am, looking for you in the darkness I only feel comfortable, if you are around And I can't eat, unless I feed you first
I used to think there was no way you could ever let me down,
Then you broke my heart and knocked off my precariously placed crown.
I used to think I couldn’t live without you,
artificial
Knock! Knock!
It’s me!! Haha its us! It’s you…
Aww don’t give me that face now. You forgot about me didn’t you?
Overthinking. I overthink the small things.Gosh he might think I’m ugly.
Or he could find someone prettier or way better than me now.
Oh what do I do?
Sometimes loneliness gnaws at me
Flashing it’s big teeth and then ripping me to shreds
Devouring my mind & emptying my soul
She looked at herself in the mirror and what she seen and what she felt were two different things. She was conflicted with herself. What she saw was her reflection, not sure what it was that she was reflecting.
When I fired my gun at a criminal, I accidentally shot an innocent bystander.I made a horrible mistake, I was supposed to shoot someone else than her.
I didn't want to admit it, but I cried myself to sleep every night this week because of you,
And I know that it is going to continue, no matter what I try and do.
I don't know why i'm like this
I never knew the cause.
I'm so cold and shaky
But now, at only 12, anxiety has swallowed me in its big jaws.
I’m not a princess or a queen
Not a prince or a king
Though I am a boy
I am only a boy
Nothing more nothing less
I know who I am
I spent last night googling birds that sing in the morning,
to give myself something to wake up for.
Tricking myself into believing I’d even be awake by then.
Because the truth is I am not ok
Wish I hadn’t said goodbyethe sadness envelops meI keep asking myself “Why?”Why not put me out to sea
Welcome to lake indifference
Here you will find the vacation home of every man I have ever loved.
Starting with cabin 208
Occupied by all the men I accidentally loved in high school.
Or at least I thought I loved.
I want to build you a library and fill it with all your favorite books
And all the reasons I still love you.
And I will never stop adding to it
That way you can wander the halls of my heart chambers forever.
I don’t want to fade away
I don’t want my poems to become a reflection of my worst days
I don’t want my obituary to say how I was sad
Or give any more attention to my dad
I want to be loved
Hook)
youre the only one....
for me.....
nobodys else makes these
dark days
not as
so shady
but now you're gone....
yeah,
all my friends say to move on..
honest to god
Angry at myself
That I still don't have
the courage to stand up,
I fall back down,
in this blanket of despair,
Way too familiar,
Where I feel secure
Lover, you were a hurricane
A tornado
The typhoon to explain why some sailors never made it home
And I used to call you mine
And I used to call you after work
And I used to hold your hand
Entertaining death
The thoughts fill my mind
My chest heavy with
Despair
Pass another year
I jest. But in reality
I begin to feel fear
This could be the darkest poem I will ever write
So I will make it a short one
So now it could be the darkest short poem I will ever write
And maybe it already is so let’s start with the light
Having depression is weird
Because you can be at the lowest point of your life
So sad that your arms can’t move
So sad that your eyes wont stay open
So sad that every sky is a grey sky
Society has carved into me, sculpting out the ten commandments in bone
Ten ways to hate myself now forever placed on my skin
If you can, sunshine, look up at the sky.
There you'll see stars, and this all will pass by.
Our world is on fire, but just hold on tight.
I'll sing to you, sugar. Our last lullaby.
Am I not a story?A perpetual jugglerOr any apparition hustling to survive?
Disrupted volcanoMiserably, a blast!Of flames and flowersPerceived as hollow and no art!
When we met you told me that your heart was a broken song
So I hope you were able to fix it with the pieces you took after shattering mine.
But mine will never be reassembled on solid ground
Every time a candle burns
I think of a field in the middle of June
Campfires in the hills of Pennsylvania
Where we watched the glow of a waning moon
And I remember the days we laughed
When the rain stops
And the sun drops
Below the horizon line
Do not forget the time we shared
Or how I held your hand in mine
But when the sun shines
In your lovers eyes
I write a lot of my poems from my bathtub floor
Soaking up sadness til the water gets cold
Til my silence grows old
Til my tears meet the water
And the stanzas are told
My mind is a Kaleidoscope of memories that I wish I could burn
But some moments are fireproof
And maybe it helps to see the world through rainbow glasses
Or maybe it’s a curse
And maybe I loved you
I always used to say I hated summer
Something about the heat
Or the sun burns
Or the bugs flying around
No matter where you go
But it wasn’t entirely true
You see
It’s true that I hated summer
I don’t understand how you can just stand there
Standing beside the river I cried
Skipping stones off my tears to watch how far they’ll go
As if my brokenness is a wishing well you have been waiting to use
They call me a slut
They call me a slut because I sleep around I guess that’s what they call it
They call me a slut because I am good at making men feel good
I am good at making men feel good because it makes me feel good.
Preface:
I am a 6’5” homosexual cis white man
Which is to say I am privileged
Which is also to say I kinda get it.
Poem:
I am sitting on my bed
I do that a lot lately
Happy Birthday, I love you
My first thought when I woke today
Happy Birthday, I remember you
A story I wrote
with the stress lines on my forehead
Happy Birthday and I miss you
Miss your laugh
Did you know there is no word in the English language,
or any other language as far as I know of,
for a memory that you’ve forgotten
A forgotten memory is the only way I can describe
I wrote a poem once about how you need to break
To truly shatter if you ever want to learn to put yourself back together again
Because no mosaic is built without first becoming broken pieces
There is a God
And I know damn well because it keeps screwing me over and over.
There is a God
That keeps fucking my life up,
I never gave it my consent.
There is a wall,
It keeps me from going forward.
I never intended to melt
To fill the mold I was instructed to fill
I never intended to fade
To break away pieces of myself
To squeeze between the cracks
To suck the moisture from the pavement
Depression is a drag queen
She sashays across the floor
Covered in sparkles and makeup
So you almost forget.
You almost forget how alone you feel
How the bar is empty
Tears stain the fake leather of my boots
the salt fringed watermarks where I left my heartstrings
There are so many marks I have left behind
In all the cities I have ever loved
And even some that I cannot remember
Dearest love, My darling supporter
my number one fan, The newest thing on my mind
I write to you
becuase I know pain
I don't know what you need
no two people can feel the same
I didn’t start writing because you broke me, you know?
I started writing when I learned to write,
I learned to write because I learned to read,
There was nothing mathematical about the way that I loved you
There was nothing logical, or choreographed, or otherwise organized.
My love for you is chaos
Was chaos
Chaos with a vengeance
You know I’ve realized
That somehow falling in love
Is the best and worst thing
That can ever happen to a person
You will feel things you never knew you could feel.
Merry Christmas Darling
We’re apart as you planned
And every day is full of pain
Since you’re holding a different hand
I'm shocked and it's hard for me to believe.My fiancee has left me on New Year's Eve.I thought she loved me and it's hard for me to understand.My fiancee said goodbye and she ran off with another man.
Walking the brightly lit halls of white walls and pastels.
Past the family holding hands in the doorway.
Past the woman looking frantically from face to face.
As if she really knows what she’s looking for.
I was there when you built your garden
I helped you pick what plants to grow
I held your hand when you spoke of the harvest and all the meals we would share.
Broken heart and foolish memories
I wish I had never known you,
I wish I had never found you
Why?? Am I now grieving??
Hot tears falling on my cheeks
Blurring my eyes and my body feeling heated up.
Hate to let you goOur life till now has beenhigh drama in a showWe both have given up ontrying to make things right,all we do is fight,stuck in a hopeless plight.I wish you wouldn’t go
I never been this confused,
what if my life will just turn to blue?
How will I survive,
if I don't know what to do.
I’m not angry at you
Ya know?
I might have been angry
Or sad
Or frustrated
Or some combination of that
Mixed with the feeling
of being utterly destroyed
But I was never angry at you
I can’t help but feel
That I will never stop writing
About this feeling
That I will never stop feeling
This in love
And this unloved
At the same time
It’s an emotion
I'll remember the moment I fall for you, I'll remember the time I was holding you, because every moment I've been with you, I feel alive,
This is just another love poem
Nothing too exciting
Just a lost soul grasping to words
To try and pull himself out of the dark
Love? dark?
Didn’t expect those words together?
Or maybe you did
I have never won a poetry competition. Never gotten second, third, or an honorable mention for that matter.I have never been told I should become a poet, but that’s not why I write.
I began to write this poem
Telling myself it would be the last
The last one I wrote to you
The last one I wrote because of you
Your final one
But I lied
I realize now
I think it’s time to let you go
I wish this healing process wasn’t so slow
It’s scary being with out you
Now who do I call
when the days have been long
You know, I wrote a poem about Tuesday’s once upon a time
It wasn’t a happy poem
It wasn’t a sad poem either
If anything it was a disgruntled poem
A poem about how Tuesday’s are the worst day of the week
Empty
This is the best way I can describe how I feel right now
How I feel knowing that it’s over
That our adventures are over
That the plans we made will never come to fruition
Today I am tears of joy
Triumphs on a mountaintop
Autumn leave and funny T-shirts
Today I am shaking knees
Giggles for no reason
I am songs hummed to no one
The squeak of new shoes
Today I am a sad poem
Not because of any man
Or any woman either
Not because there is nothing to be happy about
And I have much to be thankful for
I am a sad poem because I’m sad
It was in twenty nineteen,
Month of September in seventeen,
Black around and not green,
Grand father was not been.
I drove home yesterday.
All the way from north to south.
I drove home yesterday.
Not a sound escaped my mouth.
I drove home yesterday.
I am not going to sit here and pretend that I am okay,
Cause if I am being honest, it really changes and I have to take it day by day.
One day I go to bed smiling and I am still very hopeful for the future and what it can bring,
My heart aches and yearns,
my eyes have no more tears to shed,
like experiencing a drought
my mind can't think straight anymore, it can't focus
you fill my head, day and night
i am weary
As embers in the night,
you set my heart on fire
intense and violent, wildly out of control
spreading intensely
i find myself lost in the thought, that is "you"
though maybe it was my own wishful thinking
I cry, but only by myself
Constantly I reminisce about us
Red was the setting sun, setting your silhouette ablaze
Your smile which shined brighter than any star
I keep wondering if you think about me still
Emotions,
too hard to hide
feeling,
sensitive to the touch
feeling these emotions that I have for you
makes me vulnerable
for I feel too deeply
i feel,
Like the sun and moon
endlessly chasing after one another
giving warmth, one moment
a piercing bone chilling cold in the next
i chase after you still
my voice reaches out,
but I am not heard
I don’t remember exactly what I was doing.
Exactly what made me stop.
I remember the storm sending shivers through the walls
The raucous thunder crashing through the skies like a marching band
And the rain
It has been 20 years since the towers fell. Two decades to mourn
Two decades to heal,
But the scars run just as deep as they did twenty years prior.
Just as deep as the wounds that bleed into our streets
It's been so long since you left, I shouldn't care but, I still do, I can't stop remembering the time we spent,
I'm hurt,
At some point in my life,
I wished to disappear from this world,
I cried every night,
I’ve come to notice
On the days we scream the loudest
Our pleas have no ear to fall on
Yet a whisper of success can be heard for miles
I’ve come to notice that there is no such thing as wasted tears
I got so tired of people giving up on me
That I learned to believe in myself
Got so tired of my world falling apart
That I learned how to hold up the sky
I got so tired of the rainy days
Is grey your favorite color?
The shade of stagnation
The memory of disappointment
The sky on the worst of days
Grey like the colors of your heart
The grey from stormy clouds
I ain’t your April fool
Not your plaything anymore
Wrapped my heart with steel and wool
Sent you stomping out my door
Cause I ain’t your April fool
I’ve got thunder in my soul
After you I spent years looking for love.
For someone to fix what had been broken
But I was wrong.
If you look for love when you are broken,
All you will find is broken love.
They seem to fall gracefully at first, silent, warm rolling down my cheeks waiting to soak the creases of my neck. Emotions build, I become overwhelmed from all the overthinking. The tears brew faster, more rapid, heart beats increase.
Why don't you love me
You could at least pretend
Please call me
Please
Just tell me that you liked me too
Heart wrecked, mind dead
I think I might’ve misread
Now it left me to bleed,
My feelings mislead,
And I’ve tried to flee
So i can be freed
I'm all alone in my head,
Fighting the demons inside me,
Looking for love,
But betrayal made my demons go wild.
Now Being... “TIMID”...
AIN’T A Flavour I Choose To Savour...
Because That’s What I’ve Seen...
In A LOT of Peeps' Who Are Born In Barbados...
They’re Timid Alright But NOT When It Comes To Their Using Stunts...
Tell me your lies, tell me your sins
tell me the life that might have been
they have killed you oh once-mighty-one
for you have wilted under the withering sun
the golden god so fierce and brave
I cried.
I sobbed.
My whole body shook and trembled from my cries.
Thoughts bounced back and forth in my burning mind.
It was non-stop.
His skin, it was so soft.
His laugh, it made the world so bright.
His eyes, they told an amazing story.
If only he had stayed alive longer to notice.
To notice that he was more than just a person.
in the perfect world where nothing can hurt us, you did the right thing and gave me purpose. a reason to smile, laugh and someone to create with. another chance at your sweet love it sounds so amazing.
Time passes by,
She still remembered the day,
When he asked her out
She was flustered, happy, and loved.
“I’m coming for you!”
A little girls says,
As laughter and joy
Fills the room.
A child
And a mother
Playing hide and seek
If anything I’d hold your hand so tight, but your tiptoeing towards the other direction. Not a peek of sound, I didn’t even see the motion. I was blinded with my blood, my leg is stained with pen ink.
Losing someone can be challenging.
The sorrows stay within you.
The heart will cry; the brain will hurt.
The love will be lost and never will be back.
It's been so cloudy up here,
unable to think straight,
resort to being depressed,
being depressed leads to anxiety,
Let my chest ache,
Let my heart hurt,
Let the tears break and hit the floor,
Let my world fall,
to hell with it all.
No one cares,
my eyes leak.
Let this anger
fester and seep.
Eyes, the hurting eyes, still haunt my dreams
The memories we once had are flodding back in
I don’t want to look back at the past because i know i can’t change
we've been laying in my bed
for hours now, neither of us sleeping
nor talking, just holding each other.
from the moment he walked in the front door
i knew that he had something on his mind,
Daniel.
I am not good for you.
You know that too.
When skies arent blue I just think of you.
promise me you wont leave me too.
I love you too, babe.
[
‘Tis freezing cold, warm bloods stained on the floor; with the memory of thou numbing into this fine veins; and skin where the cold shred its warmth. ]
All those pictures
that we took together and those
that I secretly took from you—
I kept them on my phone's gallery.
Some of them were prints
that when I looked at them so mad—
Smiles of those images
In the perfect season of the day,
will our laughter remain?
I saw your eyes counting the stars,
That night.
I replay that night in my head.
The night the waiting came to an end.
The night I constantly smile about.
The night I finally felt that maybe there was something between us.
Previous month
wasn't just the end
of beginning of
new month.
It's not just how
time flies. But
how time upgrades
to new stage.
I'm living in a dream,
Save me!
I want to wake up,
I hate being in this dream,
It's so dark here,
I hate this night,
I want to wake up,
save me!
I can't bear it,
I found a box in the attic,
It was covered in dust.
It's label said "Dreams,
I'd been forced to give up."
I collapsed to the floor.
As old wounds did appear.
As a page of a book.
It's confusing being mixed.What I look like, and my experiences,they don't line up with a typical anything.I am not European-American,I am not Puerto Rican,I am an amalgamation of these things, and more.
Another day has passed,
thinking unusual stuff,
Making myself bored to death...
Walking all alone in the cold dark,
I was misguided.Interpreting all of my feelings wrong
I don't want to travel
I want to see world,In one person.And have them want me back, forever
every time I hit rock bottom
there is a new rock bottom that awaits me
its darker there
and full of more self-hatred
Wish you'd notice me,
Wish you feel for me.
Tell me, what did I ever do to you
To make you act this way, boy?
"It's not you, it's me?"
Well, I call bullshit;
I've never had the best of luck in love.
I wish, I could've told you
How adorable you're when you smile,
How cheerful you are when you speak,
Just us walking beneath the moonlit night,walking along the beach,as the waves splashthrough my toes,a little crab runs over my toesand disappears into the sea.Walking and talkingwaiting for a reply,shadows castupon the silver sandsI halt,look aro
‘are you okay?’ they ask, and i reply,
‘really, why are you worried? i swear, i’m fine.’
but i know that i’m really not okay
that this is all a mask, a pretty face
In limbo here I lie,
Trying to find an excuse, a reason to try,
But as I think of the upcoming past,
I remember that I am so not up to the task.
So I crawl in my shell and hide,
How do you feel,
When you witness demise?
How do you deal,
Without effort to try?
How do you see,
When you're dead, so blind?
Who can I be,
So dead inside?
How can you say,
Lightning strikes
Faster than I can think.
Thunder roars
So loud I can't hear myself think.
Rain pours down
Washing away all emotion.
Peaceful storm
Quieting the commotion.
Please god make it stop;
All the hurting, the lying, the running.
Please god make it stop;
All the misery, the pain, the crying.
How many more days can I go on?
Please god make it stop;
I've thrown away everything.
I think about my decisions, the tears they sting.
Wondering what tomorrow will bring;
Just another sad song for me to sing.
Just another attempt to conquer this thing.
Children are supposed to play,
Not spend so much time wondering why they've been betrayed.
At what age should a child be able to define dismay?
How young is too young for a child to learn to hate?
I spent so many years,
Doing nothing but crying.
But now I'm out of tears,
All despite my trying.
Not because I've overcome fears,
But because my soul is dying.
As the light draws near,
As your birthday approaches,
The tears get harder to hold back,
As I look back on my motives,
Remembering when my heart was in tact.
That day that I broke your heart,
I also destroyed mine,
I've never been a man to stand tall...
I've never been the man to call...
The voices; I'll kill them all...
Waiting for the sky to fall...
There was something about that day,
Tonight... I'll release the pain!
Tonight... I'll show you who I am!
A sight... I'm afraid to let you see!
A fright... A monster of a man!
I've been trying for so long to let them see,
I'm sitting here at war with myself.
Part of me is wondering what I bother for.
The other part is begging to heal.
But I can't determine which is real,
Or which entity I feed.
I'm so full of sadness,
So full of hate,
My mind's filled with madness,
I know I'll never be great.
So why not give it up
End the sorrow and despair?
Since I'll never find love
What do you see when you look in my eyes?
Can you see all the memories that I so strongly despise?
So badly I wish that I could cry.
Or even better, I wish I could get high.
I feel so sad when I wake up from a dream,
Realizing that I have to return to reality.
It's always easier to decipher what nightmares mean;
That my soul is just another casulty.
11 years later, still dead inside.
11 years later, finally alive.
11 years later, afraid of what's new.
11 years later, ready for myself, part two?
11 years ago, my soul was dead.
I woke up one day too tired to run;
I just didn't have the energy anymore.
I didn't have the resolve to fight.
I didn't have it within me to take action either.
I decided to let the wind blow,
The insects are at peace.
Living their lives essentially pleased.
It doesn't take much to fulfill their needs.
How are they so strong, and I so weak?
I feel so scared and weak.
I sincerely miss
Playing With
The child inside
But now he cries.
There was a time
When he could see sunshine
But now he's scared
He came to life unprepared.
On the ground he lay
How simple is the solution really?
Is it really that easy to live with these feelings?
Can I learn how to live while hating myself?
Can I function in day to day life without some kind of help?
When sleep eludes me,
What can I do?
When wounds won't bleed,
And those truths which I thought I knew,
About myself, are no longer me;
How does this crow fly in a sky which is no longer blue?
How does one fill a void inside?
Who is there in which I can confide?
I'd like to say I need to swallow my pride,
But there's none left, so now I'll just hide.
Why is it that I only feel safe here,
In hospitals, locked away from all my fears?
Why is this my favorite place to retreat?
Why is it only in places like this that I can feel complete?
Look up to the sky friends,
Can you see the coming end?
Red rock falling from the sky,
Hidden by flames, beautiful disguise.
Say your last prayer, beg for eternity;
The unlikelyhood no longer worries me.
There's this place deep in the recesses of my mind.
A place where the scared little child ran away to hide.
At such a young age he had given up hope,
Went into this attic and tied up the rope.
When will I stop missing you so much
The thoughts in my brain are eating me up
I don’t know if I’ll ever feel enough for you
Or any one for that matter
Just as it started, it’s all ending.
Coming to a close.
Curtain call is starting soon.
Apologies and Wishful Dreams.
Glass Hearts on Pillars.
Will I
Remember at the end?
Crying eyes
Yet I like to pretend
Questions not asked
That how I want it to be
Die young and live fast
I'm hurting, can't you see?
I wear a big ol smile
if i seem sad,
or if i my smile seems forced
don't worry
it's just my facade slipping
give it a minute and i'll be "me" again.
(j.a.s.s)
you're so uniquely your own
so perfectly imperfect that it makes my heart hurt just thinking of you
but i'm so scared because no matter how much i need you
you'll never need me with the same earnest.
My head is void of thoughts
My soul is null of feelings
My mind is devoid of words and phrases
My paper remains unstained for days,
Itching and begging for ink to pour.
The pen is dry of ink,
I was always a wolf.
Before you loved me,
And after you left.
Just because i was tame,
doesn't mean i forgot my fangs.
I can't help it
and I know it
but I'm stuck.
My feelings,
like quicksand,
have a firm hold of me
and just won't let go.
I'm stuck in the past,
the pain on my heart
I wonder,
sometimes,
if all my friends are forgetting me.
If someday
I will stop seeing them,
stop hearing their voices,
if one day
they will simply
disappear
from my life.
yell, scream, shout
silence is scarce.
with every word spoken, a new argument begins.
each room of the house is a minefield.
i tread lightly, but somehow always become collateral.
Chains tighten on my feet
I'm stuck at this same place
Your past grinds against my bones
Disgust fills my throat
I look at you with hatred
For you are the only thing I love
My heart is very heavy,
Like it weighed a thousand pounds.
Like clouds turning dark and gray;
And it terrifies the ground,
And a large army abound.
Hear! Lend me your ears!
Friends,family and peers!
For I shall tell you a tale,
That happened in our vill.
Dark brown swampland meets,
Where frogs roam free.
Willow, that’s her name.
They think your weeping, why have you led them to believe so?
Weeping Willow,
That’s what I’m told happens so.
It’s ok to be green or red or blue
It’s ok to be happy or even sad too
It’s ok to be anything that you want to
But most of all it’s ok to be you
Sometimes at night as the sun is setting,
Falling below the hills like an old balloon,
I see them. Mountains in the sky
Ominous mounds of magic or cloud
My soul is too old to settle
My mind is too deep to grasp the shallows
My bringing is too dark to contain the light
My destiny is but a flame in the void
I.The twisting spindlesof nature’s Quenched Desirepoke angrily into her spinewith the fresh sharpnessof slaughtered promises.
Hello, My name is....
you probly dont care.
I mean who am I?
A girl in a crowd...
I open up.
and you close.
My mind starts to wonder...
what couldve been if i said my name?
The night is a closed chest—
someone is standing inside
under its vaulted,
holy black cloisters…
two someones, and
another dozen: they jump
up and down,
up and down.
i've always known
i've never been the favorite child
off kilter and distant
like a drunk on the curb
so i guess it makes sense
that you've finally let go
of my cold hands
It's Funny...
If you show you don't care
people start to beleive it.
they start to hurt you
then they leave you
Then your laying there cold
tears fall down your cheecks
It is 2:30 am, Thursday night
You’ve gone to sleep and I can’t stop thinking about you
My heart feels heavy but in the best way, my thoughts feel light
there’s been so many times where i debated whether or not i should manifest you back into my life, but honestly? i really wouldn’t know what to say to you after years of being apart.
Been thinking too much about you
And its filling me with dread
My soul is screaming for its mate
Cant silence the noise in my head
You cut me deep once before
Im still trying to stop the bleeding
please don't let anything bad happen tonight.
please don't let anything bad happen tonight.
please don't let anything bad happen tonight.
I have friends.
those friends care about me.
sometimes I need someone to talk to.
I can talk to my friends when I need someone to listen to me.
I am not merely seeking attention because of this.
sometimes
i feel like nothing
sometimes
i feel like everything
sometimes
i am the sun
sometimes
i am the moon
sometimes
the world is too much for me
every time I want nothing more than to
disappear
I think,
"it's been a while since I've wanted to die this badly."
and it's true.
some days
are far worse than others, but
some days
I roll a blunt and sink deep in my thoughts. I smoke a blunt until I get rid of all of my thoughts. Clouds of smoke then I feel nothing at all.
Sometimes I wonder if I’m real
If I really exist or if I’m just told that I do
I can not prove to you that I exist
Nor can you prove to me that you do.
Is reality a conscious effort
Or perhaps it simply is?
I will weep for you
as a willow kisses the ground
I will hold your hand
as I lift the weight of your shoulder
Hear my shallow breath
count to 10
leave your bags
You and I are like the sky and the ground,
we see each other but we can never meet.
Like the sun and the moon we are far apart,
only appearing when one disappears.
We keep our hearts in parallel dimensions
I hug myself close,
Hoping that I can pull my
Scattered pieces closer.
I hold myself tighter,
Afraid that if I let go,
I have listened to your song on repeat
Over and over again in the dark
Different styles and different artists
But still your song
I have listened to every note, every lyric
And I realize only now
Today has been one of those days
All the sunshine goes away
No rain but tears fall down my face
So much sadness takes its place
My life has been on hold for so long I didn’t even realise
No progress has become the new norm
While I sit here and wait for you to love me
Like once upon a time when we were both so young
I need a reason to fall in love again.
To let gravity take me without catching myself.
To believe that I deserve more than I let myself take.
After all, how can a heart be broken if there is nothing left to break?
Couldn’t take it anymore
Don’t want you to hurt
Even the sky is crying
I’m sorry I can’t do this anymore
Daddy Daughter Memories
You have good memories you have bad ones. But the ones that stick are bad ones. I have never understood why they do, but they do.
(Dashes equal a beat)
I think of my life and I always wonder why -
every time I do, I always want to cry.
It's falling apart and sometimes I think I want to die -
My physical body aches
Terribly as it resonates through my bones like a chord plucked on worn acoustic guitar strings
I beg for the release of the metallic chains of my inability to see beyond the depths of my own soul
Bailey George,
O how I miss you:
Your shiny black coat with the crest of white on the center of your chest,
Your tiny ears that never seemed to fit your 95 lb frame,
“Mom’s not coming home.”
“Why?”
“Come here.”
Two buildings on the verge of collapse
A Fire’s bloody vengeance--
Only in the illusory imagination
Your sweet voice, which came from out-space
calling my name
When I bumping along the rough road
You are the flowers that sway around me
Your branch caressing my face
Once I had a heart,
A heart as big as the world!
Well maybe not that large…
But it fit inside of a girl.
But over time I find it broken,
Shattered beyond repair.
I should have never let it open
“Taylor my sweet it’s been so long,
since we last spoke.
I remember every word we said,
including every little joke.”
“We all have really missed you,
Everyday, every minute, every second
I feel like I am worthless
Whatever I do is never good
I feel like I am alone
With no friends
Your heart is a muscle, it contracts and relaxes again and again until the day that it doesn’t. Until the day you will no longer need it. But it is still a muscle
I hear the deep rolling growl of my fathers pick up truck pulling into our driveway
The plumes of smoke filling the air like an ominous grey cloud of warning.
i hope that someday i can change
not just for a moment
but true change
when i don’t feel these things
when i can overlook those words which have disrupted my peace
i thought i would feel peace
but all i feel is chaos
slipping deeper into the black
falling from anyone’s grasp
as the seconds continue to pass
I want to die.
It's been a while since I said that out loud
The screaming voices of the world have sworn me to secrecy
But it’s true.
I’m not afraid to say it
Not afraid to accept the inevitable
You hold an entire galaxyWithin your eyes.Shooting stars becoming tearsThat run down your face.
Depression isn’t gentle
She doesn’t knock when she enters the room
Or text you before she comes over
Instead she kicks down the door and takes what is hers
She does not need your opinion
Depression grips my wrist like a child in a storm
Holding me a hostage, in my head and in my dorm
Filling me with sadness that cannot be explained
Like my head is full of cannon balls and my ankles all but chained.
I am a human
That is all.
Even when you zoom in,
I am small.
The world is large,
I am just one of over 7 billion.
I shall take charge,
And train myself to work for the common civilian.
You make me smile in a time I forgot I knew how.
A twinkle in my eyes and a sweat on my brow
To stifle a laugh under breath made of steel
You taught me to laugh, to smile, and to feel
A lullaby drifts on a distant breeze
Sapphire’s twinkle in the light of his eyes
Dust settles down like the my tears when they cry
While a sweet silent shiver drips down from the skies
When your world freezes over like the tears from your eyes
Like a call from the doctor or when your mother cries
To feel your heart sink like a stone thrown in anger
To the depths of dark seas, as if tied to an anchor
The familiar scratching at the inner linings of your throat like a cat scratching at the walls, screaming to be let out. The sensation of your airways closing like that time when a man you did not know choked you for reasons you did not know.
tell me,
how to love when i am blue
show me what blue lovers do
when my skin looks like the sky
you dragged a knife across my heart
the way i used to drag a blade across my skin
there was so much blood
there is so much blood
and i cannot stop the bleeding
i am nothing to everyone
and the weight of that nothingness
feels like i am holding up the universe
on two bony shoulders and a curved spine
this greek myth
And here i am once again
Wondering if i'm even worth it
If this is a battle I can't win
Maybe i should just give up
I've been here before
I love life. And no despair, hellish torment and misfortune will never make me forget that just living is a great blessing. (c)
We've Lost Another Giant ... !!!
We've Lost Another Giant ... !!!
The One And Only ...
... Kobe Bryant ... !!!!!!!
His Daughter Too ...
As Well As Seven More ... !!!
I want to go away from home
Home is not here, not right now
Home is where your happy
I am happy but I'm not Happy
Home is where your free
I want to feel free
Free of rules and madness
heres to you
i can pretend that i am not lying here heart broken
that im not listening to music on repeat and sobbing into my blankets
i can pretend it doesnt hurt
I'm ready to self destruct.
Please, just hold me while I leave.
I don't want to do this, but,
a part of you will go with me.
I keep trying to run away,
now you say you need me to stay
don't look at me,
House of cards
Easily blown away by wind
It doesn't take long
To notice how fragile it became
It holds memories inside
Memories of the good times
It has always kept the scent
Heartbreak can only get worse
It feels like a huge curse
It's also like when you can't find anything in your purse
It breaks
When they make mistakes
Or if they're a snake
Look at all the rainbows in the water
She said
As she stared
Look at all the blues held in the skyline
She said
As she dreamed
Here let all my visions fly
Let me just paint the sky
By the grave I saw the cloudsThe thundery taint taintingI crave the clerical, cloudy comorosAnd its eyes have all the taintingAnd the thunderclouds never tarnishingMy grayness, I could not awaken Deep into that
It's nice to think that someone is out there
Who will listen and love me
Despite everything I am and everything I have been
Who will listen and love me
Despite my expiration date that is always changing
Some days are nothing but black
Fighting a battle in endless fog
Seeing nothing, hearing only pitiful static
Some days are nothing but black
Nights bring emptiness, fading wordlessly to fog
Head under water
Held in place, trapped
I'm losing my breath
Held in place, trapped
Still, you keep me there
Held in place, trapped
It is all my fault
Held in place, trapped
I feel like a bubble of emotion
Floating in the ease of your presence
But I think I am always waiting
For the inevitable "POP"
And knowing it wouldn't be possible
To put us back together
I'm tired of thinking,
In test dates,
And terms papers.
When all I really want,
Is to use my imagination.
The stars call my name,
But I'm busy getting A's
Poor ugly little girl
burn your lips with perfume
you mistaked as lipgloss
Poor naive little girl
just because he said
how beautiful you were
you have him the key
to your now
broken
Where are you baby
Where are you when I'm calling
Dreaming
Wishing
Where are you when I'm mising you
Baby please call, don't let me down now
Carry my dreams and tell me what they're made of
Reality hits,
Sadness bites
and it really hurts
then it dies
No one can rely
and just can't play
It can all be a reply
then somebody must repay
i gaze into a mirror
and will the glass to shatter
so i can finally
see the unhidden
form of my soul
how can it be that there are so many people
on this earth, and yet i feel like i am alone?
how can it be that i see you everyday
yet i can't make my love for you known?
is being alone normal to be?
around i see couples of two, but not me.
how come i never get this chance?
maybe i'll go to paris, france.
the beautiful light in your dull brown eyes
exposes the relentless pain you give,
i say i will find courage but it is all lies,
these past years i wish i could relive,
i don’t want to know what you think,
you don’t care, you’re mind is blowing
like the wind but eventually you sink
into your heart and it’s showing,
Everyday it gets harder
To get out of bed,
To feel enthusiastic about life,
To smile.
I can feel the pain inside of me
Growing and spreading,
I just want you to see the way you've hurt me,
the mask I wear everyday to hise the pain,
the pain that is going through me,
I need this pain to be slain.
I just want you to see the way you've hurt me,
don't touch me again. get your tiny, sweaty hands off of me
i want your Axe body spray smell mixed with B.O. out of my nose
i can never go to the park again
not after what happened on the bridge
No one asked me what I wanted
No one cares when you’re not wanted
I am not the man I wanted
But no one asked
No one asked me who I loved
No one cared I wasn’t loved
Dreaming under the rainbow
Crash from the high
There’s a tear upon your face
But do you remember why you cried?
Dreaming under the rainbow
Where are you?
You promised that you’d stay with me,
I can understand your pain but for this I cannot change.
This all appears the same, day after day.
Life replays, I do not want to stay.
If my feelings were contained in a room,
I would like to tell you that it would be filled with natural light,
Spacious but cozy,
And of course comfortable.
I put on my best brave face
As I try to hide
That I am breaking inside
People wouldn’t understand
What I’m going through
Will I ever not feel blue?
Appearing to be strong
he loves her so desperately and that she knew.
all he can ever ask for is maybe a hungout and that was sometimes too much
You burn bright like a wildfire
You laugh, smile, and immerse yourself with bliss
And they envy you for your blaze
It’s June.
I am laying on my bed.
It’s two in the afternoon.
The sun is trying to welcome me with its warm arms
come outside
<3
we were different but the same
my heart: the ground
and yours: the rain
hand and hand we ran around
shocking jealousy through everyone in town
we were thunder and lightning
my call goes out across the seas
it echos back to no one but me
a cry of love that’s never heard
an idea that can’t be that absurd
Looking for distractions
Hiding in my absence
Tired of my actions
Feeling my inactions
Scared of my emotions
Sinking in commotion
Looking for distractions
I remember the time,
my eyes were full
of this purest hope
I hardly remember
How it was
To believe
I deserved
To hope
But,
Day after day
When I feel
The morning
Breaking down behind hidden walls
secrets and lies every time I fall
letters and words that silencs stole
not knowing my worth every time I loose control
Love and hate I lost them both
I don’t understand
I can’t comprehend
How happiness and sadness go hand in hand
In my wildest dreams; when I am lost in thought
You're lying in bed.
Are you in bed or are you lying?
I cant figure it out.
I'm tired of trying
I sit alone on my dorm-room bed
Surrounded by these twinkle lights.
Passed my math test,
But feel like a failure.
I sit with my roommate on my dorm-room bed
What if i told you i'm not okay?
That i'm depressed.
How would you react?
If I told you I almost killed myself today.
I give everything I can
(in fear that you'll leave)
my time my home my patience
and don't expect to receive
I can't lose another best friend
(because I lost more)
my love my trust my faith
look in the mirror
can't help but see someone
who feels such terror
they'll be loved by no one
study my reflection
I find nothing attractive
crooked complexion
the taste on my tongue
of bitter words
that could leave you stung
the fire in my heart
of frustrated feelings
that would lead me to fall apart
the thoughts in my head
dressed in blue
I feel golden
dancing with you
my heart holden
high heeled shoes
I feel beautiful
dancing with you
moments so meaningful
posed together
I'll arrive early enough
but it's always tough
to notice you since fifteen
as you come old and green
no matter how hard I try every morning
you always wake me with loud warnings
just in time for fall
you lose your green tint
left with no leaves at all
questioning where your life went
dancing around until laughter broke
made me your reason to smile
because I am a joke
call me a friend
but I think of myself as a jester
providing happy distractions without end
leave me high and dry
in the middle of the night
counting my reasons to cry
until the stars fade into daylight
the sun's rays will fill me with hope
to step off of the tightrope
I miss being comfortable with you
do you miss that feeling too?
I miss giggling until midnight with you
do you miss the laughter too?
I miss being young with you
do you miss our childhood too?
Dear me,
you are more than a score,
more than every embarrassing moment
that breaks you to your core.
you are more than glances,
more than what anxiety tells you
in the morning Anxiety accompanies me
as my shadow in the day
yelling at me all my insecurities
but it's okay
in the night Depression welcomes me
in my bed as I lay
thank the moon
for being my company tonight
maybe think I'll be fine soon
thank the sky
for crying with me tonight
maybe think I'll finally say goodbye
Can you feel it?
My disparity,
It’s there and all I feel.
I’m desperate for you,
Your touch,
It's been months without seeing his face,
How he smiled a little too wide,
His teeth sharp with appetite.
It's been months without hearing his voice,
How he spoke a little too quietly,
When I think of you, I think of me.
I wish that you could finally see
The way things can now, for us, be.
You were the one who held my hand,
You scooped me up and protected me.
On nights that I could no longer stand,
You would hold me until my crying stopped.
Winter eyes cause wild storms.
Through the halls how they adore.
Fallen love and broken hearts
Hers is foam its blown apart.
In the light her beauty shines
To any other she could tell no lies
Taco Bell, tacos are swell, but nothing but white culture
American racism closing all chains
And we complain for immigrant vultures
Below.
Life is lived under two feet of water, And I can see the world on land.
Above.
The clouds are upon me, the days and nights bleed into one-and-other, and yet you all carry on without me
Outside.
The smell of coffee conquered the dark wooded room
I could hear the faint patterns of rain running down the worn cabin
We both walked on gelid floor waiting for the waking sun
Everyday I wake up reluctant to get out of bed
Discouraged by the thought that today will hold nothing but more pain and heartache
I close my eyes against the familiar pangs of anxiety
I wish someone would break into my house
So I could kill somebody
But I don’t mention it
To my psychiatrist
Crying alone in the dark
Every night it is the same
I’m too sick to make friends
And way Too tired to smile
The worst powerlessness is when
you watch someone you love fade from your fingertips
At first is just a few less conversations
Than no communication for a month
Months begin to pass by with nothing
i'm sorry I feel like dying somedays
i'm sorry that most days i want to be alone
so i shut down and i don't answer you
and i don't want to watch shows with you
and i don't want to talk
Uncertain futures,
We were so close.
We were near that amavi.
That latin phrase that breaks the phase,
The one that doesn’t conquer.
words spill out of my mouth
and ooze from my skin at the
sight of a july day
spent in the sun
admiring the light slipping through the trees
and onto her skin
In the silent wilderness, wasn’t so silent
My thoughts racing threw my mind, they all seemed so blind.
As I claimed to be fine, my limits have now ultimately crossed the line.
That beautiful girl
Under the blossom tree
Reading her books
She never acknowledged me.
And in my mind
I knew she never would
And even though I wanted to,
I knew I never could.
I saw you there
At the renaissance fair
All alone
Churning milk into butter
I got down on my knees
And I said the Lord’s prayer
That you would be mine
In an hour
The scariest part of being alone is liking your empty home.
It’s a double edged blade made of security and pain,
it’s depressions bed at three am,
it’s saying “i’m okay with this.”
i’m scared.
i’ve been consumed by my selfish wants,
consumed by me craving to hold you,
consumed by dreams of a better reality
Hard to say goodbye to you
But this is the only word, that I can say to you
After all the happiness and tears with you all along
A big step in my life that I have to do
Letting you go away in my life
I got a messed up brain, messed up thoughts,
people say I'm fine, but I guess not.
My vision gradually gets darker,
and my heart feels like it just got shot.
I can feel my skin fall apart,
You you shop for you self
I’m bleeding out
You look away
And say another day
You get a paper cut
And we move in a rush
he could grip his hands around my throar, and push down until
oxgen
was nothing, but a far away dream,
and still
all he would have to do is say its this, or you'll never feel my lips again
Why is the world so judgmental?
Like people,
Hungry animals choose their prey
By looking for the weak or wounded
They pursue them—
‘Temper your enthusiasm,’
She said,
‘The extremes of your reactions;
You should have
A more conventional frame
On which to hang
Your unconventionality.’
‘Don’t push people,’
She said,
Sweet sage. Tears. Hands clinched around another's as we sink, slipping below the original position.
The land shifts like dreams. Massive. Mother loves and cries of her blessings eternally.
Cycle Synechis.
Oh how greatly I hate the winter days
So long, and cold, and void of all ardor
It makes me feel so numb, so very dazed
My feelings in disarray and disorder
Have you ever wondered
Where all that it's rained?
All at the same time
And how many people that's pained?
Flood gates open
Right over the heads
Today was like every other day
It was so terribly long and so terribly dreary
I fear these feelings will never end
I’ll always feel so dark feel so hopeless
It still lingers in me,
How can this sadness be?
The voices telling me what I can and can not be.
Feeling hopeless, every hour.
Like a never blooming flower.
What is the point of life?
I am broken, I am bruised,
I am tierd of being used.
Knowing you don't care about me anymore, hurts.
Knowing I will never be able to love you how I wanted to, hurts.
Why do I have to go through this pain?
I met a boy a late summer dayHe looked at me and refused to satWhat made him so unhappyHe's a blue boyCall him defensiveBut blue boy don't run from meThe help I give is for free
-spend every moment doing meaningless things just to make time pass by faster.
-take a hot bath as to finally feel something warm.
...Half asleep, I hear a light rustle outside my window then a sunk on the right side of my bed. You lightly shook me and smiled. As always, conversation turns into an argument.
You were like an onion
Hard but easy to peel
Wondering how far I should stand away from you before cutting you
Before you start to make me cry
Again
Knowing you make me cry everytime
if you ever miss me
and hesitate if you should call
to tell me or not...
just whisper it to the wind
and let it carry your words on...
maybe i'll be able to feel the coldness of your heart then
When I was young,
I was so carefree,
At least that’s how
It seems to me,
Ain’t it sad
How things turn out to be?
Full of hope,
Full of passionate dreams,
A thrilling new world
When you walked away from me,
I began to walk closer towards you
But the cool breeze flying through me
Only reminded me
Of the love you once had for me
Up Ahead
Stands a figure
A hooded figure.
All around me is chaos,
the screams from the Fields of Punishment
Echoes in my head.
His hand reaches to me.
A soft smile that says
Is that my heart in your pocket or are you just happy to hurt me?
What’s a masterpiece like you doing with a disaster like me?
Hey, you see my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I’m stable?
If it only takes two to tango, then why do you need another dance partner? Are my steps not on time? Are we not following the same rhythm? Do I not move when you move? Or perhaps it’s you who can’t keep up with the beat.
They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Yet grass continues to grow every time it is cut. The sun continues to rise every time the moon has pulled it away.
Do you know?
Do you know what happens to a fish without water?
Do you know what happens to a fire without air?
Do you know what happens to the trees without sun?
he and i
laying on a soft quilt
the cloud cover making the room dimly lit,
but even then i can make out the details in his face;
like the freckles sprinkled acrossed his right cheek,
You’re not here anymoreto laugh at my stupid jokesand say “I love you”to make me feel specialor loved in any way.You’re not here anymoreto make me breathethe air that you’ve become to me
You know what they say
and you’ve heard what they’ve said
Go seize the day
Don’t stay home in bed
But my head is too heavy
And each move is a battle
My bones are not ready
You hit me hard
You played your cards
You broke a glass
And caught the shards
you broke my heart
tore it apart
You left me here
Nowhere to start
So the story goes
I’m sorry that I couldn’t make you happy
I’m sorry that I can’t make myself happy
I’m sorry that happiness isn’t a language I speak
But I loved you
I’m sorry if I pushed you away
I am drifting, a lonely piece of driftwood covered in pale moonlight on an open sea. I don’t know where I am going nor where I came from, but I am drifting. I feel hollow, empty like a piece of me is gone and it can’t be replaced.
I’ve been trying for weeks
But I can’t seem to find it
I’ve been biting my cheeks
like the idea is inside them
But the blood starts to pool
with its signature taste
I feel like a fool,
i would brighten the sun to keep you warm,
but you just put on a jacket.
i would wipe your tears to make sure you can see,
but you use your sleeve.
i would search for you in a crowded room,
i'll admit it
i am not much of a poet
i do not know much about rhyming
i just know about the individual
and how it is hard to be original
how we sit here and talk about nothing
Yes I am broken, but I am not defeated. I am like a salmon breaking through the surface of the water in order to fight the current. I am a glow stick breaking in the hands of a child on a summer evening, spreading my light.
A loose excerpt from The Icarus Complex:
There was a child named Icarus,
Who always dreamed of touching the stars.
They had wonderful intelligent parents.
God were they intelligent,
23: that’s how many days it took to stop thinking about you every time I woke up. It’s how many times I sat alone with hurt in my eyes this year alone.
I wish I could tell you
I have something to say
But when I finally try to
You walk far away
The somethings a secret
That only I know
I tried hard to keep it
But it’s starting to show
What if I could live in a world in which I never fell for you? What if I never fell for you? What if I never fall again? Never feel the scrape of my knees hitting earth again.
All of a sudden you’re falling
You’re running a marathon, free like a bird, but then all of a sudden you’re falling.
You know, there is a possibility that I am not spider man. Probably a small one, but it’s still a possibility. I mean Spider-Man must wake up with an emptiness in the left side of his chest looking to the right side to the emptiness of his bed.
Cadbury eggs at 1 AM
How much lower could you be?
I know that it does not mean much
But it could be two or three?
Besides don’t I deserve this?
For waking up before it was 2
Do you remember the days, the nights, the adventures we always used to share? Flying away on wings of laughter that were built on mutual care. Five good friends and lots of fun was all I used to need.
I once had the chance to take a stand
To give the world my helping hand
Or make a difference in this land
But I walked away
When I was young I loved to dance
To put my soul into a trance
These heavy hearted warriors
With medals on their wrists
These sadness stricken gladiators
The world can not resist.
They fight their daily battles
You do not need a second job
My mother used to say
But ma I’ve got this mouth to feed
And bills I’ve got to pay.
Isn’t one enough for you
To land you on your feet?
Just one more
I promise that’s it
Just one more
Then I promise I’ll quit.
Those lies you spoke
for so many years
An ocean of needles
and too many beers.
Can you smell the smoke?
like the smell of summer nights we can barely remember,
sitting in circles around a glowing red light.
Do you hear the distant crackle?
As I sit here in this class surrounded by the usual humdrum of teachers and students, I reminisce on the days in my aunt’s backyard. I reminisce on how it felt to simply lay on the lush soft grass with her dog.
the memories of you have burned a hole into my brain,
theyve singed my hair,
painted the walls ash-grey.
i asked if i could burn the sweatshirt
but it wasnt your face i was looking at,
The salt stings my eyes,
As tears blur my vision.
But I refuse to let them fall.
The skin on my palms now covered wih little crescent moons,
As the fear of losing you becomes real
The salt stings my eyes,
As tears blur my vision.
But I refuse to let them fall.
The skin on my palms now covered wih little crescent moons,
As the fear of losing you becomes real
your touch it lingersit lingers on my skinyou were so warm I never wanted to give inas tears fall from my eyes now I can finally seeit was never you it was meI want to see youI want to feel
Our last dying rose
The thorns that hold the grace but
Love knows no way to survive because
He kissed me
He took something
A first of many
Something I followed with a smile
To mask my fear
I didn’t feel any different
But I knew
Something was different
nothing turns into something
im surrounded with grey rays of dim light
a storm cloud looms over my head
they catch the rain but the storm doesnt pass
my clothes are soaked and my mascaras running
hey
howve you been?
it feels as if we havent talked in a while
what are you doing?
you seem busy
Me, Myself and I.
Everyday, I wake and try
One step at a time.
Everyday, I wake and cry
One time, I was small
And carefree, lovely, and kind
I was just...
Me, Myself and I.
They say the Apple doesn't fall far from the tree,
But I have tried so hard to just be free.
Trapped in the life that was killing me.
I was 16 when Mocha died.
I should have seen it coming.
She'd been sick for a while, we'd had to cut her tail because of a tumor and she couldn't breathe too well.
She wouldn't go back upstairs, no matter how hard I tried.
i pull off my heavy-weight sweatshirt
i weigh myself
ranking up to nearly 100 pounds
im satisfied for now
Tears well up in my eyes.
I can see through your eyes.
My heart is falling into pieces.
I'm gonna capsize.
These emotions welling up inside of me.
I can't face it alone.
Wow,
What a mouthful
But the title is true
You know who you are
This is about you
You’re a lier
A cheat
Long hair gets in the way as the guitarist starts to strum, eyes closed, nails long, nails painted, mic close
she’s mine, i’m hers, honey, darling, baby, love me and i’ll love you
hope is elusive,
something hard to find
and hard to have.
but yet we all hope for a better future and a better lover
why?
Memory erasing
Mindlessly awaking
Walking through a dream I'm making
Slap me in the face
Untie me where it chafes
Release me from this dream
I want to be awake
Take me from my home
if 11:11 were real
i wouldn’t wish for you to stay
instead,
i would wish to un-know you
to heal,
for joy,
and for self-love
i would wish for the things that you took from me
a few days agoi wanted to sit down and write about how unappreciated you werenot that i changed my mind, noi still believe thatbut todaytodayi'm hurti'm hurt that
welcome friend, it's dark down here.
for most, it's much too grim
the table's set with plates half empty
the cups spill o'er their rims
I'm sorry I closed off
a generic ringtone, a sound foreign to this 2am hour
a beat as we freeze, glancing down, and then up
"hello?"
a motion towards the bottle
clink, pour, swallow
"things aren't looking too good"
a pause
Empty
It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise.
Understanding Death
Death is abstract.
It comes in varying forms,
and sneaks up on you.
Suddenly, she appeared.
One Hundred and Sixteen
These quiet halls are bleak with emptiness.
My footsteps, slow and loud, alert no one.
The door to my room grows taller,
I guess it’s like God in human form; I guess it is God sleeping, and I’m on the moon ready to jump. It could be any moon— discovered; contemporary. I think God sleeps on Enceladus...
Darkness darkness, I open my eyes still darkness
Voices call out all bitter "nothing! Your nothing"
I call out no awnser
Darkness steals my voice
More voices still bitter
Acceptance of pain
I am in a constant state of dream and nightmare
One moment,
The sun is smiling at me,
showing me the world in bright colours,
helping me laught at the bipolarity of life.
You were my big brother though we weren't blood,
Through everything you always came through,
Now that you are gone my tears begin to flood,
Wished I could've said goodbye, who would've knew?
i love and hate you
for you are both an enemy
and sometimes an ally
you manipulate my emotions
bringing them farther down
until happiness becomes very high to reach
you take advantage of my happiness
waiting....
hours go by.
it took a hole in me
leaving me empty, cold and mourning.
as it eats me up
leaving me with nothing but burning lungs and a broken heart.
A rose by any other name
Has thorns that are just as sharp.
An ocean in any other day
Will drown you if you try to run.
I feel happy at the moment.
But I think it’s like a high, or a rush
So
When will my high
Come back down?
I don’t want to be there for that
I don’t want it to happen
The biggest lie I ever told myself was that I wouldn't stay up too late
Studying or doing work.
Now that I'm on my senior year of high school all of that
Went out the window.
it was the sun that became my friend
from school to school
to house to house
the sun remained.
as friends realized
soon i will just leave again.
the sun remained.
family couldn't accept me
A ball of anxiety, curled in my stomach.
That bad boy spreads into my heart and brain,
Causing quite a havoc.
Hello, anxiety.
I am just soft serve
dipped in hard chocolate
melting on the inside
but still remaining solid
to the eyes of the beholders
I am older now
things are easier to get over now
What is your biggest regret?
Starting this semester offWith the deep questions, I see.
Regrets? That’s what they want from us?
Regrets are easy. I’ve got tons.
I loved you how only a Midwesterngirl would love a tornado warning.I didn’t want the sunshine; Iwanted wild, whirling,in-the-moment April
My therapist said that I might have PTSD;that the sight of any bug in my bed may send
me into hysterics. She says that I’m scythingtoo much skin off around my ankles, and my
His sharp, sterile grimace is chippingat me—two yellowingblue-milked eyespaintingthe deep, red hills aroundmy spine.
i’m still bitter about it
but i think i’ll always be bitter about it
but just because i’m bitter
doesn’t mean i miss it
miss YOU
i suppose i’ll always be upset
that YOU moved on so easily
Nothing ever happens between us.
I try and try and try, but my words stick in my throat.
God knows how I feel, how I've felt
How can you torture me so?
The truth is I love you
One day you're home,
and then another you are left all alone.
Abandoned, gone, and lost.
Looking around like theres been a holocaust.
People say life is black and white-
There came a point last year when I realized I've grown;
I wasn't the same person that walked through the front doors freshman year;
It was as if the narative of my life had taken a different tone;
I thought you were doing fine, I didn’t know what was wrong,
I thought you'd push through it, that you were invincibly strong,
As a friend I should have supported you, helped you along the way,
At the age of 4, I began new adventures;
A hedgehog, a vampire, no, a gamer starting to venture.
I was new and inexperienced, I just didn’t understand,
Like Kindergarten and field trips, I was entering a new land.
im not exactly sure how it began or when it started, all i remember is that you were distant towards me for what seemed like the second week in a row since we last actually tal
Fear is a looming gray
Looks like a rainy day where the sun won’t come out
Smells like the stink of sulfur
Tastes like bitter acid
i am so afraid that all these
unfulfilled expectations,
meaningless romances,
broken promises,
are going to turn me so cold
that the next person that touches me
will freeze
I stare at the Sakura tree,
Night after night,
Day after day,
Waiting for it to blossom.
I watched the tiny buds,
Night after night,
Day after day,
Just waitting for it to happen.
I look at the shiney golden ticket in my miniscule hands.
The fog from the train clouds my eyes as I experience nostalgia from watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory as a kid.
He brings danger before me
A story of a lover an a fool
A story how painful love can be-
A story of life is far too cruel
The two souls wished to keep their courtship pale
His genocidal urges were now set
i look into his eyes
as he stands there
watching my tears fall,
knowing that he will
never see me the way
i see him.
“do you love me?”
her bright eyes dig into your soul,
her star-spun fingers twitch nervously.
star-spun imagination
making everything about the sky
see the galaxies in her eyes
the stars in her hair
Baby girl whered you go
Planned a date but you dont know
Bought them tickets to the show
Come to me so we can flow
Last night i dreamed about you
Forever with you, you know this is true
Hold me. Hold me and don't let go. No matter what happens, promise me you'll stay. Promise me I will always have a place in your arms, but don't make a promise you can't keep.
i didn't quite understand
until judas knocked at my door,
and held my hands in his.
"I forgive you," he told me
"now forgive yourself."
"what your biggest fear?"reads the paper above. you remember the ache in your chest, not a few months backwhen you had spiraled down and slipped through the cracksyou remember the down you had hit years agothe doctor said it would come againit tur
When did my feelings become second to yours? Why are my opinions wrong and absurd? When did my silence become your turn to speak? Why, to you, am I small and weak? Why am I bad even if I’ve done nothing to you? Why, when I give the world, do you a
You asked me to write for you,
So I wrote of a boy with stars in his eyes,
A bright soul, and his heart on his sleeve.
I wrote about how he died and how the light left his eyes
Your flame-seared name...
It burns...
When I learned of you,
Dear Flame,
The games you play,
The hearts you slay,
When I found this out
All thoughts of you
Just went away
Dipping my toes
Into the endless midnight blue
To me,
it's a deadly hue.
First my ankles,
Then up to my knees.
Pause.
Remind myself to breathe.
My clothes are wet now
Ode to Myself
What a tragic image…
a beautiful tempest
Your typhoon
touches my land
I am reminded of the image.
Will I catch you
before the damage?
Self Portrait as the Weeping Willow
Reservoir in my eyes,
current of my heart,
snapped the twigs of
my veins.
The fear, I feel. From
My head to my toes.
All I could see,was a fine silverit was so quick,but my heart was even faster,for this silverit could not outrunme in this raceBut, sadly I couldnot replace me for youas my regret
I pull myself deeper
as my mind is a weight that
pulls me down
into the ocean where
all the strange and ugly creatures
make their home in my
abandoned temple
worn down by the hands of
Can I be?
Could you stay?
Do I deserve?
Should you help?
I could try.
You could too.
Morning sky,
Less blue than you.
They asked me what are some different types of drugs
For me a drug isn't cocaine or pills it's a person
He is my drug
He is what I got addicted to
He is what makes me feel like i'm floating
When I was small
I would believe
That Fairies surrounded me
And protected me
From the bad
But when I grew
My fairies turned to dew
And formed my tears
And leaked to the ground
The rain is my peace.
My eyes were the ocean.
My heart in ruins.
I shook violently as the droplets struck me.
.
The rain is my peace.,
For she cannot see my tears.
I see you in every angry fight,
every bruise,
and in every goodbye that is never said.
~awatr
Her eyes reminded me of the old embers in the fireplace,
unkempt by my absent father.
~awatr
I spent every waking minute thinking of you.
And when I shut my eyes at 3am?
There you were again.
~awatr
I told you that you took my breath away;
Little did I know that you were suffocating me.
~awatr
I stole a friend, I took them hostage, I held them here to listen.
You didn't know me when I pulled my gun, you didn't know what I wanted.
You begged for your life, I begged for you to listen.
Every weekday is agony.
Dread the time it takes to learn.
Beg the clock to tick faster.
Get on your knees and pray
to a being that you’ll soon forsake.
This is the story
Of a girl
Who had everything
But felt nothing
She wasn't beaten
She wasn't bullied
Her home life was fine
The night is my closest friend
But all of that is pretend
For in the waking hours
It then sours
Depression is deep
Quite like the black hole of sleep
It takes you away
Never to see the light of day
No matter my plight
It still puts up a fight
A tight emptiness in my throat
A quick consideration of options but endlessly told to say nothing
Youth does not hide the terror in trying or the knife swallowed as i do nothing
“Together forever”
“Together until the end of time”
That’s what we used to say
But every promises
Are meant to be broken
Everything has changed
We’re slowly getting further
I noticed you,
Walk with her this morning,
Hand in hand
She’s very pretty,
Match your own beauty
Who is she?
Is she the last person you think,
Before you go to sleep?
Oh, how I hate this day,
It reminds me of everyone I’ve lost.
It fills my soul with dread,
It breaks down my mind.
It reminds me that I’m alone,
I come to the realisation
that
I can’t remember those winters,
the winters of my childhood.
It was really good at all times,
and it was really bad.
Now it’s bad all the time.
The darkness envelops me.
No one sees it.
No one will.
Only me.
I feel it,
I see it,
And I know it.
Good bad Light dark Evil spreading through the parks Lurking behind you like a shark You turn around and jump in fright But try and try with all your might To see the good within the beast You find it, relieved, to say the least But there are ma
All this time I’ve livedin another reality.All I did was giveand I was happy.
My reality is notwhat you would expect.But I wasn’t taught to not let it affect.
You gave me love for one day
I see you constantly and what do you say?
Absolutely nothing
I am told this is the way you are
That you love to be loved and fail to give any
Air is an acquired taste
That most want to breathe
But my own air is two parts heartbreak
One part grief
It burns my lungs
It burns my lips
It burns my tongue
Falling in love with him was not my first mistake, but my biggest one.
I mean, I could have easily said, "No" to his sea foam eyes,
But they just sucked me in like a tsunami in the ocean of my heart.
Even though the sky weeps with us today, tomorrow shares the warmth of sunshine and friendship, healing our sorrows in the light of rainbows.
You painted me out to be desperate
But theres a difference between desperation and being hopeful
I waited for you because I was hopeful not desperate
I was hopeful for us but I didn’t need us to workout
How to express yourself to yourself
Living life fake and wishing to be better
A mind were there is no control makes you think of the dark creeping inside
My vision darkens.
My stomach churns.
My heart races.
You saw my pain but you used me anyway.
~awatr
I’d laugh
Care
Understand
Feel empathetic
Love
But all of this and more I’d still have if you hadn’t ripped my heart out and kept it for yourself
I loved her, she said I convinced
Her otherwise
That broke my heart
Was she my sweetheart?
I’m not sure..
Do I still love her now?
Of course I do, but I was a fool
A place to ourselves as we cleaned off the shelves
My, how things pile over time
Our hearts were racing as our fears we were facing
The whole night, I ate maybe a dime
Heart of stone has I
None may ever
Pull the strings
Of quartz
That is beating
In my chest of lead
At the sight of
Dandelions sure do look like flowers
But they're weeds that wilt in just a few hours
To my untrained eye, it looked like a real dollar bill
But a distorted George screamed "Counterfeit" and still
The same day that you said you would stay forever,
Is the the same day that you had left me,
Forever.
It was my fault, I know.
When I feigned myself as someone I wasnt,
some days i just feel like cryingno particular reasonjust, i have to do it or elsei feel like i haven’t said helloto myself quite yet
You were there when I needed you the most…
When I was breaking under pressure,
Like a sapling overburdened with snow.
I always thought of myself as a mighty oak,
Just a reconnection. Please, it is all I ask.
Just one spark could set ablaze our past.
We could be something again.
But this time, we’ll last.
I still listen to all the songs you told me about. It's like the only piece of you I have left. They bring back bittersweet sadness. In myself, I've found some of you.
You've always compared me to a rose and I never quite understood why. Is it because I'm pretty? Or is it because I have thorns? Is it because, if you get too close you'll hurt yourself?
Hey, you.
Yeah, you.
It's ok to be sad.
But I just wanna tell you that you're loved.
Okay?
It's ok to want to be alone.
But I just wanna tell you that I'm here for you.
Okay?
Sometimes I believe that I have everything I could ever want, other times it feels like I am falling into a dark place and I begin to see them haunt.
Your eyes were like a tired sunset,Shining with a soft amber light,Seeing the beauty in even the ugliest of things.
It swirls within me,
Messing up my insides,
Organs queasy and tightening.
My heart pounds,
A drum with a messed up beat,
Fast and unpaced.
You wouldn’t want to know,
What happened that night.
The fires had come and gone,
Burning all the forests down.
Landslides in the hills and mountains,
A tsunami that had come from the ocean.
there is another thing that I cant unseemy brother smilewhen he used to see me
he used to smilebut now its clouds
I hurt him so muchI cant even begin to describe what he could feel
I’m jealous of the clouds,
that are full of rain,
how they must feel when they pour down,
everyone knows that they are sullen,
my empytyness is hidden by a smile.
Fragility is the stability of the broken mind
Do not confuse the lies that hold the two down
To be fragile is the empowerment of the vulnerable
To be stable is the advantage of the emotional
my thousand pound heart
lie dormant in my chest
feeble now from the effort
bumbling softly through my sweater
I don’t notice the warmth anymore
cold wind stings my cheeks red
It’s something so dark,
Enchanting and hard to remark
From the beginning to the end,
Not even the brightest of humans will comprehend.
It’s something so dark,
Sung with the dullest spark
All I have are memories,
But I barely remember them,
I miss you,
I know your in a better place now,
I'm happy for you,
I wish I could of had more memories.
There's a boy I know
That mostly sticks to his own,
He doesnt speak much
But hald assed insults,
He closes his eyes
More often than all of the time,
Shy boy
Quiet boy
Tired boy.
Digging through my mind,
Searching for the reasoning behind
'Why can't I?'
Too much of my scalp beneath my fingernails.
My friend waves a phone in my face and huffs.
It's a brand new girl everyday.
My friend points and judges this girl with anger.
She finds flaws in each and every way.
Get up from bed and something isn’t right
Everything is muddled, dirty and foggy
I scream and cry not knowing what is going on
I go to the bathroom and see Myself in the mirror
I could see her face
Deep in the storm clouds
Smiling at me
Saying “Come here,” but how?
I got the crew to safety
Told them to go to their wives
But I couldn’t go
You know what?
I'm tired of the bullshit
Oh you wanna talk?
Maybe I'd have time if I wasn't I fed up
Always mouthing off
About how you this and that, not!
You always on this hype
I can see the hate in your eyes
It doesn’t matter to me.
All I asked for was to be left alone,
But you didn’t listen to me.
It just keeps going on,
And I’m tired of you
I can’t get any peace
tiptaptiptap
fingers on the table
rhythmless and bland,
we cut off the cable.
tiptaptiptap
rain on the window
erratic and soothing,
we watched the world go.
tiptaptiptap
Liked by many though I still feel alone,
Surrounded by others but still trecking on my own.
they try to understand my pain but they have different trials,
though no one truly hurts me death begins to beguile.
Confusion.
That is the first emotion I felt when I found out
My favorite step sibling had done the unthinkable-
Suicide.
I wondered, who could've seen this coming?
Not me,
Hi daddy.
Remember this morning when you left for work
You promised to come play with me when you got home.
I set up the teacups and food for us with mommy
Oh! And I made the tea that’s actually water all on my own.
You told me, "It's over..." again. I know that, Jorge... It's been over.
You know that and I know that.. And of course...
You KNOW I know that.. So who was the validation for?
There's nothing more I'd like to do,
then snuggle in close and fall asleep with you..
I really want to call you...
& tell you I still care...
But I know you won't say it back....
& I don't think it's fair..
There's a place for everything and everything in its place..
Well, where do I put the memories of the past I can't erase?
If I could build the truth for you, I'd make it out of titanium steel...
I'd weld it together with all of the reasons -WHY- I STILL feel the way that I feel...
FOR: My Ex Now, but My Love ONE 4ever.. J.G. (*BTW, MOST of poems are about him....)
I'm glad you took everything that would remind me of you..
Cause I don't want to remember anything we went through.
This thing called life changes from good to bad. Where were the signs? I should have saw the signs. All my fears comingto life. Disbelieve is my heart, for the road i have to take there's longsuffering and malaise.
doesn't it rain sometimes
on the inside
and isn't it funny
your umbrella can't be opened
because it's bad luck.
I'm the cold air that you breath
The heat of hell beneath your feet
Now I'm here and then I'm there
I was your happiness but now I'm despair
From a racing car at the dawn of life
The peace I will feel when,
my eyes are unable to blink,
when my legs are unable to swing.
the peace I will feel when,
my hair stops growing,
mouth stops smiling.
The peace, when my heart
Euphoria,
the feeling a bee feels
when it finds a daisy.
the feeling a dog has,
when it finds a bone
a bird, a seed.
a lion, a zebra
me, you.
I feel like an artist,
Desperately trying to blend,
My darkened soul,
Into the rainbow that was once,
My mind.
Your hands slowly,
Trace their way down my thigh.
Your lips,
Make their way to my chest.
But what is lust,
If we don’t have love?
Smile.“I’m fine.”Smile.“Just tired.”Smile.“oh, sorry, I’ve been busy.”Smile.Smile.Smile.
It’s funny,isn’t it?How hard it is to tell the difference between a smile
She sadly walks away
Because you never had a heart
There was no love
Right from the start
She gave you everything
But, you threw it down the drain
When those walls close in
they told me
don’t if youre gonna leave him
they told me
don’t if youre gonna break his heart
and yet
i decided yes
and i fell
Tear stains
underneath her eyes.
Sick of being used
for the things she hates
about herself.
“Why do you fall so hard, heart?’
Why do you trip
falling downhill
The person I hate, someone I blame: myself.
Devoid of meaning or direction. Moving in circles
Blindly searching for the destination. I’m a bookshelf
Without books. Incomplete. Lonely.
All I have left is three words for you
Correction, that is all you have left me with
Three little words comprised of 8 little letters have been left to summarize us
Roses are red and wilted too, I've tried and I've tried to please you, built you a home with my sweat and blood, and in return get treated like crud, I gave you all of the riches and gold, you promised me together we'd grow old, I've tried and tri
Swimming through water so black,My heart beats dully in its cage.Not a soul should see the crack,Splitting in pieces with conquering rage.
Here I sit
Without me
Without you
I feel like my throat is closing in
Im not sure what this feeling is
Doom
Doom comes over me without warning
I feel like I need to scream but can't
My sister used a quarter in a machine the other day,
one that drops random surprises, mostly worthless
but still they are kept, for reasons unbeknownst by most
As the claw picked up a ball, stale candy joining the fall
Lo and behold, inside of me
in a crooked corner that plays hymns of once spoken words and memories,
there lies a prophecy
Encased in glass to be broken in bed positioned moments of convincing
Look at the way at how you treat your lady
She seems bitter and confused
Darkness sadly surrounds her
As a result of your abuse
She put her trust in you
And you have let her down
I've seen things I never meant to see
And dreamed of places I'll never go
With you
Well, maybe you're just an archetype
But not the soul sent to save mine
From you
Some of the sunshine disappears
When a loved one sadly passes away
You think of all the good times you had
Each and every day
Those precious memories are still there
Even though that your mom is gone
I feel like I am drowning. Silently burning underwater
every time I try to breath, I remember
I must conserve my air.
Force it back.
Stay alive for just a little longer.
I loved a boy,
who loved himself.
With my arms right around his body,
i felt cold.
He kept me at a distance, I complied. Lovestruck.
I only wished for love in return,
It kills to see happy in other facesSeeing the bright and wonder in their eyesI present glossed eyes and sympathySad eyes play syphonies for broken heartsTo ponder and paceWhat a simple life that awaits
i dont know if im really who i say i am if im happy if im great who knows what i am no one but me. but im making sure that even knows my image and my heart im sad and happy who i am limbo i just want to obtain that one thing every human desires ha
Trapped in an asylum of comfort and love
I’ll never truly know what I’m capable of
Sorry Mom, I leave you behind
But you have a piece of my heart worth
A collection of lifetimes.
Within the clouds
I find nothing
But within your voice
I see something
In the distance,
The dark is near
But in my heart
The stars are clear
with time comes responsibilty.
only those who can partake in such things such as a job are said to live happy
but does money makes us "human"
does being wealthy make us proud and lovable?
I was in love with you before even knowing your existence.In your eyes I saw the meaning of love when you first looked at me. And I was wondering how? And why Me?
I was lost and alone,
Hopeless and afraid,
Storms raging, endlessly...
But I lit my own torch!
I Braved my own storm!
The mentor I had.....
Was ME.
In a matter of days, I have become addicted to letting go.
Letting go of the food that my mouth consumed only hours before.
The smell of vomit filling my nose like gasoline
it burns.
To forget would be a blessing,
to remember, a curse. Remember how he held my shoulders down
covered my screams with a sweaty palm, ripping
all pride from my body. I felt rage as he plunged through my body,
Her lullaby is sung by her tears just to awaken to the same Melody. Her smile is faked so she can face the world. There are no words to calm the sadness that over flows onto her face when she's alone.
Ako'y nanliit
Sumikip bigla ang dibdib
Nagmukmok sa kwarto
Puno ng pighati
Agad tinanong sa sarili
'' Panget ba ako? ''
'' May mali ba sa akin?''
'' May kulang ba sa akin? ''
The voices around me makes me wanna do something I shouldn’t.
Can you get underneath that, interpret that.
Understand on a subatomic level the danger of those words no one will truly comprehend.
My heart feels so empty whenever you're not near
I wish from deep inside of me, you can always be here
I know though that you would soon grow sick, glued unto my side
As my aura slowly kills everything aside
Dear mom I'm falling , I'm turning myself in I'm sorry for being born I'm sorry for all that I have done wrong
The beautiful teacup sits on the window ceil, catching everyone’s eye.
Her beautiful painted face, is all they need to see
To them she looks happy
This teacup is me
But if you come closer and pick her up
Like the tide
You come in
And out
Of my life
Salty water
Seeking to
Cleanse
Seeking to
Burn
Red eyes,
Flaming
Cheeks
Seagulls
Help. I’m alone and I can’t cry for help
There are monsters stabbing my mind, I must conceal from everyone else
When it comes to being loved, I simply just repel
I don’t want to nail the floor, I am lost with no direction
Drops of water descending from the silver faucet
Looking at the arms that once belonged to a pure soul
A dark feeling rushes from head to toe
As the blade is drawn upon her tender forearms
I saw you today.
You sat there and laughed.
I was near certain
That I was going mad.
I watched you sit there,
With a laugh and a smile.
I nearly started crying.
Haven't seen them in a while.
I wake in the morning,
And the first thing I do
Is start to get high
To not think about you.
I take a long puff
To forget about your sorrow.
Take another one in
To forget about tomorrow.
Here lies the time of which it commenced
The days past as every sand
Of the hourglass
In a fell swoop of descending
If the cosmos were mine to mix
And the beauties thereof, mine to possess
Home...
It was a typical
day. The same people
taking their daily walks and the
same children playing. Their smiles
precious, but unfortunately temporary.
Within human introspection comes a price,
A revelation to the darkness of the mind.
Venturing inside requires the roll of the dice,
Are you ready for something not so kind?
I would say Shel Silverstein was our first friend
That's how we learned where the sidewalk ends.
Bet you thought this poem was going to rhyme
But that was the only line I could get out my mind (just kidding) head .
I remember your smile,
The way it would light up your face.
How your laugh would sound,
And sing throughout my body.
I remember your anger,
And how it would scare me.
The way you'd get sad
I'm drowning in a world
Where you are the air.
I'm starving in a land
Where you are the sustenance.
I'm dying of thirst
Where you are an oasis.
I'm left behind
From where you had to go.
the rain pounded heavily last night
drops of water ran slowly down the car windows
matching the silver trails of the tears that wound down my cheeks
rough hands that weren't yours stroked my skin
Browsing the shelves of knowledge that I have retained in my mind,
I take a moment to reminisce and bring to light what I gathered from every life experience.
Love.
Pen scratching gainst the page
words whipping in her mind
letters bleeding into the page
as a way to be safe instead
skin full of old scars
tears dried up in her eyes
instead of inflicting pain
I miss you a lot… I miss you a little
sometimes a lot feels too little.
I wait for you here -but you will never be near;
you left me alone
stranded in tears
I hurt so bad, it's getting hard to breathe
How I feel inside, well you wouldn't believe
Thanks for making me cry, what I total waste of makeup
This nightmare feels so real, come on Maddie, wake up
Why won't you treat me like I'm perfect?
Why won't you treat me like I'm worth it?
You ripped my heart right out of my chest
You did things to it that I never would've guessed
Couples don't treat each other this way
Having a broken heart makes it so hard to breathe
I begged you to stay, but I ended up having to watch you leave
Best friends? Best friends till the end?
I guess with time my broken heart will mend
My family and I have been through some rough times, but them kicking me out is the worst part
They left me confused, feeling unwanted and with a broken heart
I'm going to have to find new ways to let all of this pain out
I'll be satisfied once I can see all my bones pressed against my skin.
Society taught me that you're only beautiful when you're paper thin.
They say that beauty is only skin deep
Why do we do this stupid little dance?
It's very well coordinated and I know the steps by heart
But you don't seem to understand that with each twist and turn we destroy what we have
It's broken down into simple steps
Poetry
Was always there
Whether the darkness was
Or wasn’t
Whether family was
Or wasn't
Poetry
When someone you love dies
and you are not expecting it,
You don’t lose them all at once:
You lose them in pieces and fragments over a long time –
Their scents and fragrance begin to fade
Like I drug I was addicted
I couldn't see that you were vindictive
Using me to get back at her
Shattering my fragile heart like a mirror
Freezing over from the coldness of your heart
Her heart was ice and It was breaking.. killing her. Slowly she is losing herself, by giving herself to him. The love she was giving him, he was giving to the other girl.
what is a beat
dusk to dawn
settled down influenced by the near uprising
peaceful. safe.
chained within
If I could ask for one more dayThat I could be yoursI’d bask in moments, the love, the security.the purity in our intentionsBefore we refused to speak what was unintentionally mentionedThe lies you’d cry
when i told you that you were so much more i didn’t expect you’d make me feel like i was so much less
you saw the stars in my eyesyou heard the ocean in my voiceyou smelled the breeze in my breathyou felt the galaxy in my bodyand the
You have sadly thrown your life away
You are drowning in misery
Poor decisions have been made on your part
As a result of hanging around bad company
You need to wake up
And take your life back
In every night, there is a morning.
In every morning, there is a night.
But in the darkness of every night, there will never be a light.
I see how intensely
you take a drag
on your cigarette
down
toward
the bottom
of your lungs
as the hands of the smoke
suffocates you
Dear,
My mother’s ex-boyfriend of two years,
My biological father left when I was six
And ever since then, I've been looking for someone to fix
I used to think that all wood was still a tree,alive and strong branches supple and willing to supportleaves, fruit,two little girls full of dreams.Within the cracksin the walls
His tongue tastes of wine
I feel childhood memories on his spine.
His eyes shimmer like the sea
I know why he has that scar on his knee.
His lips taste like cherries
I watch him devour some Ben & Jerry's.
I see you on every fuzzy border and margin,
In every memory and sentiment.
Sometimes you bleed in like a watery cloud of steam on the glass wall,
And sometimes you peek through the windows,
Through my fogged up glassesThe world looks somewhat softerA crumb calmerA fraction friendlierIt looks adequately welcomingmore mellowslightly sweetBut just for a moment.My glasses clear
there is a little rain cloud that hangs above my head
it follows me whereever I go, to wherever I am lead
sometimes it will disappear and the sun will shine anew
but nowadays it never leaves and i don't know what to do
another relationship
another breakup
today, our one month anniversary
she breaks up with me
after isolating herself for days
blaming me
not even trying to fix things
i wish you the worst, the same that you wished me
i hope you drown, just like you told me
you looked me in the eyes, spring of twenty eighteen
you fucked me up, and i should've just screamed
I told myself I was done with you last night.
I am so over feeling used.
I am far too good at goodbyes
Hating the way I try for you
Heading down a corruptive path
Will put you in a lot of trouble
Your life will sadly become a dead end
If you do not move on the double
Darkness will rear its ugly head
And the walls will come closing in
Racehorse
The Kentucky Derby was yesterday at 4 pm and the bullet shot
Like a fire in the air.
Her eyes are rolled back like the way the sea curls into sand
My mother bought new dinner plates.
I didn't think we needed new ones,
They were five dollars,
She said.
I was against using the new plates. My heart was racing and
flowers need more than water to grow
maybe that’s why I run away at the sight of them blooming
I can’t even remember to water them once a day
how can I sustain them for years?
I don't know why I was attracted to you
Its not like you were a good person from the start
But after it was all over, you left me blue
After you left you still made my life fall apart
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It's scary what hides amongst color.
what colors tend to hide.
a smile hides a falter,
a wristband over red stripes.
it's scary what hides amongst color.
what emotions hide in your eyes.
dark nights,
laying in bed,
wanting the world to just
stop.
cocooned in a blanket,
silent tears,
or maybe
big
loud
sobs.
Cut off my leg and sharpen my bone
I stab myself for every time I thought you wouldn’t leave me alone.
I was an idiot to think that you wouldn’t go
but how the hell would I know
I’ll look forward to the day we can laugh together again
And it will be just like it’s always been
You hurt me more than you’ll ever know
One of the hardest things I’ve ever done was to let you go
Life is meticulous.
it lingers on, trapped
in between the cracks
of "destiny", and "maybe".
and everything is shady
or burning in the blaze of
ray beams ...
and right now its flaming.
I hope the thought of me hurts you and tears you to shreds,
And makes you never want to see me again.
I hope you fight yourself back from calling me,
every time you look at a picture that reminds you,
You exhaled empty promises like carbon dioxide.
And I inhale them like oxygen.
I guess that’s why whenever I was with you, you took my breath away.
And when you walked away was when I could finally breathe.
I love you!
And I don’t know how to tell you that I love you
Is the problem that we’re having here
The thing is you don’t even realize
How much I love you
And you won’t unless I make you realize
ill do something that not even that bad
and you get so fucking mad
but when you do it
im understanding and trust you
im not treated fairly
you never make me feel like you care about me
A surge of fear goes through her heart;
She's all alone and torn apart.
Just weeping softly in the dark
Without a single light or spark.
In the face of every single trial,
The girl had smiled, for she was not afraid,
And with each and every agonizing passing hour,
Her smile grew larger and her eyes shone brighter;
Such darkness there
You find yourself in solitude
Who are you to disrespect your mother?
And be so impolite and rude
Your demeanor must change
If you are going to get somewhere in life
No more tears left
Your on your own
Sleepless nights
All alone
It shouldn't be this way
Love isn't cold.
Wasted hours
Day and night
Hand on your heart
And all was right
Girl, why do you tolerate his mess?
You did everything for him
He never appreciated you
The look on your face is really grim
You put your heart into everything
But, he often made you feel sad and blue
To be in the middle of this,
Should I be a friend
Or should I be more?
Being your friend is wonderful,
But being your lover is a beautiful blessing.
I'm scared, I'm confused, I'm torn;
My blade is tainted red
and it doesn't help when you shout.
i wish that i were dead
so just put me in the ground.
i'm done with stars and banners,
i'm done with tear drops too.
Now i'm laying in a casket
well, do you want to know why?
these stripes across my forearm
i swear they were a cry
i really wanted to tell you
i really wasn't "fine"
but well, you believed me
I am free
I am open
I am a flowing river with words streaming
from my fingertips
pooling on paper.
Expression.
I am alive in a world where many are dead
or maybe not really dead
i have made a huge mistake
i've made it and wish to take
all the pain i've caused away
either tomorrow or today
i don't want to drive away
the people in my life
but it isn't my first mistake
I sit.
And let my rickety bones rest
As I rest,
Irealize how quickly life zooms by, but now I'm sitting on the sideline
As I sit,
I rock back and fourth, wasting the hours away
As I rock,
Oh look how the rose withers.
Oh look how the petals fall.
With time it begins to shrivel,
Till time fine’ly makes its call.
Wheels bearing stiffly on a frozen road,shoes clatter softly on fallen snow,a veil of black covers swollen eyes.
You said that you loved her
But, your actions sing a different tune
Unless your demeanor changes
She will leave you really soon
How can you call it love?
When all you do is manipulate her mind
Bite through it
Push it down
Iron grip, so that you don’t drown
Porcelain face with shattered eyes
Pray to god that
She can’t see the pain
FLAMES BURN EVERY INCH AROUND ME
EVERYTHING I TOUCH TURNS BRIGHT ORANGE
I LIGHT A CIGARETTE WITH MY FINGER
INHALING EVERY BREATH OF SMOKE
THE FIRE BURNS BRIGHTLY
CONSUMING MY LIFE
MY MEMORIES
You need to go away
You have manipulated her heart
Sadly, put her through torture
Right from the start
Cunning and deceptive
You have showed the dark side of your personality
sometimes i dream of a faraway place
sometimes i dream of outer space
sometimes i'm exploring a dangerous trail
sometimes i'm a bird with a feathery tail
but sometimes my dreams turn dark
there is a doll i own
it resembles me, down to the bone
so whenever i start to change my ways
it changes too, on the same days
one day i decided to change it myself
even though i knew it could change itself
RUN INTO MY ARMS
KISS ME UNDER THE MOONLIGHT
SPEND THE NIGHT WITH ME
LOVE ME FOREVER
I SAY YOU’RE MINE
AND YOU SAY I’M YOURS
BUT WHEN YOU HUG ME
WHILE MY EYES ARE CLOSED
You sadly drown in sorrow
Because, you have been led astray
Following bad company was not a good idea
You have drifted away
Window of opportunity will close
There will be nothing for you to gain
He tasted like mangosi couldn't place it until the next daywhen his lips were no longe
Never let your Past catch up to yourself
No matter how much the past stabs your back
keep your head up and run with those who give you hope
We as humans are born to endure hatred and Depression
My name is Cascade Linell
and i'm not fairing to well
but those around me tell
that i 'm feeling swell
but i hide behind a lie,
so that no one can hear me cry
i wish i could just hide
I come to seek a
Great Perhaps
In a world where I can be okay
i'll confess my sins
and won't dwell on the cut communication
i won't Divide the world into versions of me or You
Smile for yourself
Make sure everyone knows you're alive
No one Exists for a Second
The little things matter more than you think
Being told you're Pretty
Being told you're Amazing
And most importantly
We sing like Rain
We scream like Thunder
We shine Like lightning hitting the Crashing Waves
We Mourn like the Storm finally calming itself
We are gloom like the grey Skyies after a Hurricane
(This is a Persona Poem for Min Yoon-Gi)
An inspiration, that’s what we’ll call
my life path.
The melody still rings in my ear when
I hear their claps.
The melody that plays now,
There is a girl here/She spends hours looking out windows/tracing swirls on her skin with a finger/Sometimes I think she's imagining freedom/mostly I imagine she's thinking nothing at all/ Everyone here is broken/but while we still exchange false
counting knots in the wood slats-
the ones i can feel my nonexistent breath bounce off against
the ones holding up the musty mattress that does not get granted a body for most of the year
silent cabin
I want to die,
I'm scared of death,
So sometimes I just hold my breath.
I close my eyes and count to ten,
I pussy out and breath again.
And they speak of age – the elder years.
It’s always tomorrow. And tomorrow has not settled. Now,
Darkness, woe, and failure stench abound.
You look through a glass
I know she’s on your mind
you cry tears of spite
yet your heart remains kind
And you keep on wondering
How a girl loved as she
Would keep you expectant
Darkness It’s what separates the good from evil It’s the lack of good and the lack of light It’s the feeling that creeps inside of you when you least expect it It’s a force strong enough to bring the strongest man to his kneesIt’s enough to drive
I hate the feeling of
nostalgia.
I can try to go on a walk in the
road,
just to clear my head.
But all it does is stuff my head with more
memories.
The summer afternoons after swimming in the
i still sleep
with the light on
in hopes it will travel through my ears
into my dreams
faster than the train did
With this being our last moment together, whether or not you know it.
I owe it to you to be as honest as possible, but that's impossible to do and not hurt you.
I could sit here
tracing lines
in your hands
Outside of time
endlessly
full of dreams
A buzzing phones
the trance that
held me ends
I am thrown
I write to you on this tragic day,
To tell you how you have been betrayed.
This love is fake,
It was never real.
What you felt,
Was just a deal.
You entertain me,
And I make you feel.
I am constantly trying to remain sane but the status of
our relationship is driving me over the edge
or maybe i am already over the edge and the breeze of
Your mother is now gone
But, you can still hear her voice
She will always be there in spirit
To help you make the right choice
Remember those lessons that she taught you
And the times you all spent together
Can you please make me remember,How we started this fight?‘Cause I can't remember,our last good night. What are we doing?I said I loved you, You said you might. This is a jumbled mess,Do you realize?I look at your face,You look away from my eyes.
The sun it shines,The stars they shimmer,The moon it reflects,Yet my world just grows dimmer. Moments I know can never lastand soon they fade into the past.
A break up is something couples dread the most.
It is something couples avoid or else they'll feel lost.
Our significant other is the one that makes us whole.
I cannot wear the red blouse.
Lines that defined my curves taunted my eyes
Blurry tears dripping as I ran faster into dusk
To fit into a teenage concept of “sex appeal”
My Mother is the greatest actress I know
She's able to portray the "perfect" wife when she's around friends because they're all BFFS
She is a volunteer junkie because she cares that damn much
I'm paralyzed.Stuck in these feelingsstuck in my head.It's too late for treatment,I'm already dead.I'v
Nothing but pure madness
As teachers and students run for their lives
Such a dour situation
Filled with corruption and strife
The mark of evil
Has sadly, reared its ugly head
Looking at the stars
Thinking about the place I go every day,
The place I call home
But it doesn’t feel that way.
Home feels like bad dream
Ode to the Hard Holidays
Whether it’s Christmas
Family coming together
Celebrate the birth of Christ
Gratefulness
Whether it’s Thanksgiving
i taught you how to love again. i helped you open up your heart to more than just the familiar. the love you had grown to know.
Remember when I was born?
Remember when we went to Las Vegas?
Remember when we went to Chicago,
Dearest father
I’m eighteen now
Can you believe it
Probably not
You were never there in the first place
So why would you care now
I like to think that sometimes my mother lied about who you are
Dear Dad,
Sometimes I wish I never met you.
1,000 miles used to be the only distance,
But now we're quite through.
And yet, I still think about your existence.
Dear Brad,
I just wanted to thank you…
thank you for being my step-dad, my guardian, and my protector.
These are words I wish I could say to you.
Dear Dad, Hey, it’s been a while, I didn’t really expect you to be gone so soon. How are you doing up there? I know how picky you are, so I can’t assume. Things haven’t been the best since you left, But we are getting by. My
Dear Almost lover,
I'm writing this because I never got closure.
It's been awhile since we've talked
and I think it's time for a disclosure
and I don't want to be mocked.
Dear IT Department,
My PC is dead.
It no longer whirs and beeps
Its CPU is void of warmth
An amateur's cheap creation
I love you in the morning,
with soft sunlight peeking through the curtains
casting over your sleepy face;
eyes dazed,
smile slanted,
The light in her eyes had dimmed
She was no longer,
Then she saw a ire, it burned golden red
The flames were attracted to the darkness within her eyes,
they engulfed her whole being,
Dear Anxiety,
Not a day goes by where I am without you
Not a day goes by where I like you
From holding me back
To making me cry
From filling my head with negatvity
To making me freeze
Dear One,
I miss your smile
I miss your laugh
I miss your spirit and your craft.
When I started this letter it was too late,
I should have written it before this date.
You taught me kindness
Dear Nathan,
I’m sorry I couldn’t say goodbye or even say hello
I wish I could’ve stopped you
And showed you that you weren’t alone
Or if I couldn’t do that
Dear anyone who’s going through a rough time,
Currently, my life is a riptide. Life has slowly began to
come to a high but I know, in time another fall will
follow. I had to be hurt, many times to understand
I dreamt of you last night,
you were smiling and holding me tight.
I stood on my toes to reach your height,
your beautiful face captivated my sight.
Something about you seems so right.
You didn't love me
Because you didn't know how to love
You only knew how to play
So indeed you played,
With my heart. My feelings. My time. My life. My mind.
You say you know what the world means
When you never know your silent screams .
The world is pretty with all to do
Where everyday there is something new .
But tell me this
February 2, 2017
Dear Person Whose Life I Tried to Make Perfect,
Arielle, you were light you were gone before we saw this when you left it was dark I couldn’t see who could replace such a beautiful thing nobody so it stays dark, like the darkness right after the sun sets i pretend like it’
Up and down that's just the way it goes
Some days you're high then others you're low
Life will be great no matter what path you chose
Just remember that somedays you will win and some you will lose
Since I was a little kid, I always had this feeling deep down inside
Dark deep emotion that kept me alive, as I even feared it
You.
I’ve cried more times than i can count today.
I don’t know what will become of us.
I want to stay with you because you do make me happy, but nothing is written in stone.
A Fallen Hero by Steven Isaiah Gilliard
I was known as being tough and respectful.
I was highly respected by my fellow brothers and sisters.
My Sweet Peanut
love of mine
make me smile
all the time
My Small Raisin
on the floor
i giggle at you
you smile some more
My Perfect Balloon
always far from reach
Dear, the unwanted note on my whiteboard,
You stated, "Shut the fuck up cuz"
You were staring at me.
I was a young girl
Confused with the things
I had experienced and seen
I was too curious
I tried to experience love
So imaginative
Dear Future Jeff,
I have so many questions,
Don’t know where to start.
Are we keeping it together,
Or continuing to fall apart?
Right now, I’m really excited,
Not sure what to say.
Dear him,
We were beautiful
Like the the breeze on a warm day
Like the peak of a mountain top, miles away
Your hands were soft
Dear Mom...
I don’t even know where to start with you these days. How are you? It feels weird to say that.
Do you wonder how I’m doing, too?
I’m 25 now,
A woman. Last time you saw me I was a girl.
What if dying isn't deathIf when we leave this world…
The weight of it is simply off our chest
When we take that final breath
they say that in order for someone to
live,
someone must
die.
and now i must know.
who was the one who
died
I was either
too young or too naive
too selfish or too needy,
But your love was the thing I needed.
Never had I loved
someone’s eyes,
0. We all wonder how many times parents pray for a child with no complications before birth.
1.
2.
3. I learned the alphabet but momma is foreign on my tongue like my forgotten native language.
4.
My best friend tried to die twice in the same day.
First with a gun and second with a wire off a hair dryer.
One peron's Heaven
Can be another's Hell
And truthfully I say I hurt
I shudder
I weep
Is something wrong with me?
How unfair must it be
That I am unhappy
Dear Dad,
I look back on the days
When you showed me all of your love
Showed me all of your care
When I thought you just acted tough
Always left your side fast
Dear Ma,
The eleventh of March
Nineteen seventy-nine
Baby born at this time
Little foot with an arch;
Her dark green eyes glistened
As she looked at her mom
Pat held her in her palm
Dear My First Love,
Second guessing my hope in us
Comes from the misguiding thoughts of others
Talk of wanting better for me
Goes through one ear and out of the other
But I know what is best for me
Dear Betrayer,
Sometimes I sit around and think
About how everyone has a focus
One day I could just fly away
And my loved ones wouldn’t even notice
Or maybe they would start to see
To that Fake Fricking Friend
I really, truly, hate you
But I love the heck out of you
You are my beautiful baby but girl you are a benevolent bi-
Biscuit tray delivered from Grandma
Who? Am? I? . . . :’(
(written by an ENFP)
Who am I? I say fuzzily . . .
A tear drips out of my eye, a single droplet.
I am the world’s savior I say . . .
My sad eternal tears keep coming back . . .
And once again I must shed my tears to go and cry . . .
Despair is all I got to hold my back. . .
My sad eternal tears keep coming back . . .
And once again I must shed my tears to go and cry . . .
Despair is all I got to hold my back. . .
Dear Ex Best Friend,
I stand upon the shore of roaring sea
Attempting to see all that I have lost.
I dream what might have been and still might be.
The saddest feeling
Is the one not felt
The one that stays, and is never let out
The one that haunts
and torments
The one that fills you with nothing
the one that soaks you dry
indigestible being
that was the lesson--
you had to leave
they needed to
let you go
even though you thought of youself
as sweet
remember,
you too, were poison.
what's left to say in those whispering tones?
got gasoline in my brain
and ink on my bones.
what's left to recall me; but the walls of my cell?
they say it will heal.
but i think that was hell.
wow look at her
they see my past
judging before looking
nasty rumors fly fast
they see the scars
the way I look
they way it is hard to trust
they all laughed at the fact
on how i acted
When they told meYou had gone away,I didn't thinkThey meant forever. I thought you wereOn vacation,And I was jealousYou didn't bring me. But even now thatI understand whatThey said,I still wish IHad gone too.
Dear Daddy,
I think it's been a while father,
Don't you ever wonder what's going on with your daughter?
It’s been long since you’ve gone,
my romanticizing eyes
leave me tired
with each sweet smile
my heart gets stolen
is it that i’m so desperate
for the love i was robbed of
Of a melancholy tone
She is through with you
Look at what you have done
And the madness you've put her through
Just consider her gone
You manipulated her heart
Always the one to torture
I know you probably have had millions of different people around the world seek out to you. People of different skin tones and cultures, who have been searching for you their entire life's and not to even have a glimpse of you. The real you.
Love is a thing with Arms,it loves to craddle you when most weak -It listens to your thoughts and changes them- All you do is out of love-But what is love might I say-Dreadful tears and sorrowful alibies
Dear YOU,
I know you hear what they say about you, it is hard not to listen.
Their words will not cut smooth like a knife through butter, but like a serrated edge through drywall.
This is our last chance to grieve
Dear Lord, I was only thirteen
The host of trepidation freshly forgot,
You coerced forgiveness from fester and rot
They talk about fairness
And honest wages.
They talk about making it all right.
They make jokes about work unions
And they like to say it's all going to change
Or they quite.
But they are weak.
Inside it is dark
There’s a monster in me
It is something I can not hide
The monster was created to shield
my fragile heart from pain.
to the person i can’t forget,
the sun sets,
taking my happiness with it.
the same way you left,
taking parts of me with you.
and i realize,
after you left,
Little girl, now don't be sad,
I understand your pain,
How you feel there's no way out,
That you have gone insane.
Dear God (if you are even there)
The world is cruel
Most people realize this at a young age
Well at least I did
When I was young, everything seemed so big
my parents fell out of love
screaming silently
they never fought, it was only
tight lipped smiles and
white knuckles on coffee mugs
not listening when the other spoke
and finding away to disagree
Girl, just turn the page
He never was into you
All he did was criticize
And broke your poor heart in two
It was nothing but a facade
A masquerade at that
Do not drown in sorrow
I didn’t mean to choose this.
I didn’t ask to feel like this.
But I do.
I want to feel like normal people do, but I realized that I just cannot.
When you head down a corruptive path
Darkness is what you will often find
Nothing but a somber and gloomy matter
One may sadly lose their mind
All of your trust is thrown out the window
Dear The One Who Hates,
I still remember the days that we shared.
The plucking of flowers and pulling of hair.
The theories of God that would fly through our heads
Big Brother watches us, down on the ground,
Doing what we are told, not making a sound.
We listen, follow commands, its our nature,
No other lifestyle that we know.
Telescreens looking close, that's the game,
The girls wore pink,
and the boys wore blue
The girls did ballet.
and the boys played guitar.
The girls wore makeup and jewelry
and the boys wore jerseys and Nikes.
The girls and the boys
Your ray of sunshine hath died. <br>Perhaps the things I thought true Were nothing but deafening lies, A façade. You were like a sister to me Always a shoulder to cry on. The room no longer glows a golden hue as you enter a room, But a mee
Dear Rapist, it was three years ago now.
That lonely day when you defiled me
Where I screamed and cried for you to please go.
My fight was for naught unfortunately.
You left me there, ravaged and abandoned
Once again that my heart shattered
Lights went blackout, no more flickered
My head went full blank
My life I had hang
I thought my life doesn't matter
Kicked in the stomach
But standing straight
Smile on
But inside tears escape
Bruno mars and backseat singing
windows rolled down
highway swerving
Nurses,
Should be nice.
Or at least that's what I thought.
They didn't care about me.
Hurt yourself?
Stop crying.
Lonely?
Oh well.
we are more.
more than you remember.
we were fire.
maybe I was just the lighter
maybe you were all the trees burning off us
maybe you saw me as the candle,
it is difficult
to have loved someone
who will never feel the same,
because a hopeless love
is the emptiest
and loneliest love
there could ever be.
lessons can be learned,
however,
The rain fallsPitter PatterMotionless and powerful,In a steady flowing patternWashing away the thingsWe no longer wish to see
Dark skies
Lonely nights.
A city full of people.
Yet its not so bright.
I'm so in love
but I'm not.
Maybe just in love with feeling.
In your stomach.
You know, the knot?
Dear Future me,
I see that your rich and successful or that’s what I want you to be.
Or maybe not, I’m confused and that’s what I’m told to see.
~
I’ve been disappointed in you a lot and I know that’s not fair.
Confusion and frustration are present
We may be lost in the shuffle
Just get it together immediately
And move on the double
Nothing but pandemonium
Not a soul knows what is taking place
My chest is tight
My throat is closing
My stomach is in a knot
I feel my heart breaking
I close my eyes
I feel you, next to me
You are noiseless
You are cold
My mind is a computer,
It plays games,
Process information,
Turns to power-saving mode.
But if this is true,
Then what are my disorders?
They are flash drives,
I said i’d leave you alone
But nights like these make me want to talk to you.
You’re the piece of my youth & desperation
That god no longer wanted to carry.
dear boy i almost gave everything to,
i am not a glistening bar of solid authentic gold,
i am not a crystal clear 50 karat diamond,
i am not a smooth pearl that shimmers in the sun.
i am a ruby.
I long to see your face,
To hear your voice,
But that will never be the case.
I want to pull you into an embrace,
Squeeze you tight,
For all the negatives to be erased.
Girl, his heart was never there
But you decided to stay
You were blindsided by love
He has sadly, led you astray
You have suffered a great deal
What a tough lesson to learn
Next time just open your eyes
Some people
Love it
Hate it
Indifferent
I hate them
I go into a daze
I get depressed
I cry for no reason
I have mood swings
I feel like rather
Than everyone is
You used to say
The only way
You could ever sleep
Was in my arms
So when did it change
That I was the one
Wandering at night
And you were the one
Finding solace in sleep?
I only started
Praying again
When I thought that god
Might give me a hand
So for the second time
In my life
I lay awake at night
Reciting the Lord’s Prayer
Every single night
I couldn’t sleep again last night
Demons plagued my dreams
Wearing faces of love and affection
One that you often see
Demons plagued my dreams
Whispers of I love you
I’ll never leave you
They carry the secrets
I whisper at night
The moans of love
Oh, just sex, that’s right
The things I keep
In my mind out of sight
The walls are alive
Dear mother,
I banged on your bedroom door with a bleeding heart
you pretended to be asleep
I hate you
I came home and found a note on my bed, in which you wrote
Oh, how these past few months have been filled with tears.
Losing you was by far one of my biggest fears.
You made me face it, with your sadistic, evil ways.
And now we haven't spoken in days.
Thank you,
I am my own Alice
seeking a non-existent
wonderland,
I am a butterfly
fluttering about in
a flowerless field,
I am a pen
deprived of
the badly needed ink,
He once spoke of her as if she's
a rain in the middle of summer,
a blooming flowig amidst the fall,
a ray of sunlight during winter,
until she became a dandelion of a windy spring.
It feels good to be sad
I snap when I'm awaken
There's a beauty in being alone
That in groups is overtaken
My words become their words
I get nervous and don't think
She has decided to walk away
Because, you did not treat her right
Nothing but a chaotic scene
Situations sadly, ended in a fuss or fight
Face the reality of the matter
She often drowned in tears
Why?
Why must you spurn me so?
Your words harsh and cold.
Why must you abandon me?
Leaving me lonely and melancholy.
Why must you taunt me thus?
Childish insults stripping my confidence.
Conversation has sadly drifted away
All hope is fading
We barely speak to one another
Girl, why are we masquerading?
We need to open up
This eliminates the bad air
Obscurity has reared its ugly head
so stuck I cant write ...can't even get insight ...on why I can't keep up the fight...or why I never feel right
every one has there thoughts ...as I feel left out ...stomach in knots ...not even allowed to pout
From the first day i ever cried
without reason, i was told to
be stone cold, never show 'em how you feel,
because emotions are bad bad bad
don't use those dirty words.
Through the darkness,A candle burns,Erasing the varnish of the tainted world,This flame shines,Leaving behind a forgiving line,
Tavern mugs and boisterous laughter,Another line in this wondrous chapter,Long after the sun has set,Quills still write, and candles stay lit.
My entire life, there is one thing that was drilled into my miserable brain.
“Bottling emotions is wrong.
But let me make something clear.
The way a spark can create a fire burning bright so too can it be snuffed out with swift vengence
The world is a cruel mistress with no allies and no mercy
All those days you celebrate fortune you fail to recognize the coming
Rape lasts longer than a moment,Rape burns an imprint into the self.Rape strips more than the outsideIt thieves the words from your frightened mouth.It makes you think you are different,Like you’re deserving of this sin.It cripples up the bodyIt f
dear love,
you are a nightmare
dressed as a miracle.
you are misleading.
you are troublesome.
but somehow,
you always seem beautiful.
you always seem to pull me in
Hello motherHello brotherHello sunflower Hello rush hour Hello proud boyH
My anxiety cripples me
I take it on as a first line of defense
My tongue’s as sharp as a knife,
I’ll cut you with my words until you bleed apologies
I’m the kind of anxious that gets too comfortable
I'm sorry I'm such a mess and you gotyourself tangled up in this but pleasedon't fucking leave me because thesky and the stars and the moon don'treally make sense without you
When the morning comes
My heart is full of sorrow
For I prayed that my eyes did not see a tomorrow
Put me out of my misery I plead
Do a young girl a good deed
November 1st, 2016
Dear the Man,
Challenge me here, my dungeon of sorrow
Make me or break me, a push of tides
You left a point on my blunt dagger
I’ve got couple bong rips
Held with a deep grip in my lungs
Yeah
I got a couple slits
Not just the ones that cover my eyelids
Dear Daddy,
Do you remember that day out on Tiana Bay?
I was four years old,
Big brown eyes, twig legs, and abounding joy.
We went on the boat,
You are just standing there in the dark
The look on your face seems grim
The lady of your life has taken lots of abuse
Your outlook looks mighty slim
She feels battered and betrayed
Its frustrates me.
It pisses me off.
The way she can say
She wants boyfriend
When I was a great one
But no she dumped me
Cuz she was gonna cheat on me.
Like what the fuck
I wish not to be forgotten
Or my seemingly numb heart
Because of the things I’ve said
But did not meant
And my dry voice
I still think of you, as I lay through the night.
Looking at the blank space, praying for you light.
My thoughts go crazy at the thought of us to reunite.
I've always wondered, if I was your knight,
Dear God,
He just committed a fraud.
He promised to never leave,
And made me believe.
Oh, why?
Have I been told a lie?
Now I lay confused,
And my heart is bruised.
Oh, please guide me,
Oh it's you.
Hello again! I know, it's been so long, it's so nice to see you!
What do you think? I've barely been holding myself together.
Are you kidding, I've never been better! How's the wife?
my life has consisted of loss
death and betrayal
ive seen it all
i want a new path
a chance to restart
a fresh slate
clean off my scars and wounds
and start brand new
Share your smile with the world.It's a symbol of friendship and peace.Because of your smileYou make life more beautiful and prestige
The soul that sees beautyMay sometimes walk aloneLoneliness adds felling of unwanted And expresses the pain of being alone
Dear Bully,
We haven't spoken much since middle school,
I'm sure you've noticed.
Or perhaps you haven't noticed.
The only thing that I am truly sure of is you used to notice me every day.
From whatever distant island you're
viewing me from today:
I have conquests on nations.
But you can't see that through a lens,
or a message,
or That letter I never replied to
My hair is long, which is nice, but I have too many split ends,
My natural hair is wavy, not straight like theirs in my defense,
I’m short, I could never be a model, I don’t have the body for that,
Girl, why do you stay with him?
And make an excuse
Haven't you had enough of his mess?
Along with all of the abuse
Time and time again
You have sadly, sat there and drowned in tears
I’m stuck here alone and broke, just my luck,
What can I say? Growing up sucks,
I’m getting fat because all I do is snack,
Don’t grow up, it’s a trap,
A nuisance, a loud crying baby,
I can’t express how annoyed you made me,
But I was young and I didn’t know,
That you were a blessing in disguise before you had even grown,
A shoulder to cry on,
Goodbye
I wont see you again.
We don't always love what loves us,
But please do not forget
that we laid out in the parking-lot
Have you ever had a dream?
A nightmare, to good and then evil.
It's like eating something really sweet over and over again
I feel alone in this loud room
chaos is all around me
and it will drag me to my doom
I just want to be free
they are so so happy, smiling
while I lay there dying
I've given up on it all
Ill use the love letters you wrote me to fuel the fire I light to destroy this paper house I have been living in.
blood is thicker than water, they say
but to me, they are the same
i feel the blood leaking out of my heart
like liquid pain boiling through my skin
and
Let no man be lesser.
For all
Are mere specs
on the
backdrop of the void.
No,
they are particles
Inside
an expanse of nothing.
We are
Merely the reality
of our
alone burning with anger
becoming stone the only defense
she gets hate from a stranger
she didn't do anything worth offense
.
I'm gonna start working on me, myself and I
Gonna stop all this just tryin to get by
telling me to "get better", "stop crying", "you're fine"
Self-Inflicted
I do this “thing.”
I bring more pain to myself when I’m already hurting; and I can’t stop.
I crank the sad songs,
I drive in the pouring rain,
No one will see your sadness.
Even if your insides
Are bleeding violently
And screaming
Their loudest scream,
No one will notice.
Not because they dont care to,
But because souls are
No one never really understands
Unless they see from the same point of view.
share the same brain
and the same lifestyle as you.
People judge.
Jump to Conclusions.
Dear Sophia,
I love you.
Because I love you,
I'll text you in class, although Mr. Roberts isn't very fond of it.
Because I love you,
I'll cheer for you at tennis practice, even after coach blows the whistle.
Autumn
Is the season of fireworks in the trees
The tea time that never trully ends
Carpets of color layering the sidewalks
And plastic pumpkins by the door
Scarves and fleeces and boots
“How was your day, Sweetie?”
“I should get one for my partner too.”
“I mean… Would you want to?”
It’s as simple as that.
Dear momma
Thank you for giving me Real Love
The kind of love where
I feel safe enough
To be myself and shine
Real Love
Because I Love You
Doesn't mean you can hurt me
Because I Love You
Doesn't mean you can desert me
Because I Love You
Doesn't mean you're not supposed to care
Because I Love You
I had waited.
For.
The rain to stop.
But.
The sky stayed open.
And.
It did not seem.
Like
You would arrive
Sadly.
Then I found out.
That.
Passion stirs up within my fragile heartEverything I have ever wanted hereNothing in this world can keep us apartNo earthly sorrow or crippling fear.
Every time we communicateThere is no positivityThere's things that you put downThat I think are greatConversations are dullThey drain meWhile the fill you upTear me downWhile they bring you upShatter my heartWhile they toughen yours upI can't take
You often find yourself in a trance
Because, you did not treat her right
She really is tired of your mess
Night after night
She has drowned in sorrow
Tears have fallen from her face
They are saying It’s Christmas The bells are all a’ringing, But somewhere, deep inside Someone’s not singing The beds may be made, full of joy and of care But a little girl’s still crying Since her idol’s not there We’ve all lost a lot This year,
I would do anything for you
I'd fight a dragon
or go on some magical quest
Because I love you.
I would turn up at your door,
For nothing more
Than to hold your hair when you are sick
A wax sky drips over a sidewalk corner
Illuminated by a burning-wick sun
As I smile at the old men living there,
Baked and leathery and meaning everything to nothing
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for the lies, the things I've done, and constantly reminding you how little I care.
Hands placed on a unclean slate. Clans faced off and deaths happening at a unreal rate.Bodies lay quietly upon the ground, shoddy warn down knives all around.
We spent night upon nights spitting words laced with toxic until our minds grew numb
but we still said good night and we could feel the warmth
The sun is hot and painful
It leaves scars on the skin
It brings fires to homes
The sun is blinding
But I can’t stay away from him
Because I love you, it feels like it was only yesterday,
You looked into my eyes and I told you to stay.
Because I love you I’d get nervous around you,
I didn’t know what to say or what to do.
Do you think what you say doesn’t hurtBecause i'm here to tell you it doesYour words are like a hot knifePiercing deeper and deeper with each sentence You think you can say anything through a screenBut in reality you're just a coward Who does
I tried to stop myself
Falling was easy
Realizing you didn't fall too
That was hard
As I was falling
I knew I would hit the ground
I knew you wouldn't be there
I fell in love with you. A foolish girl I was, to fall for you.You stole my heart away. I wished for nothing but to please you.I only asked of you to look my way. Please look my way.
You wouldn't look my way.
Because I love you I listened to you, Because I love you I cared about you a little too much I lost my self in the process of showing you my love, in
I am sorry, it is time for me to depart
I have seen the person that you really are
Yet, he wishes for me to stay
Pulling the same trick just so I stick around for another day
My love, is it you?
i do not want to loose your soul for another because of blindness.
am i blind?
I miss you but i cannot remember who you are and loneliness
Girl, what happened to us?
Conversation has sadly ran dry
This has become a masquerade
Time continues to pass us by
If we do not communicate
Darkness will appear
Of a melancholy nature
I look at you with longing eyes and I recieve a warped image of a stranger who was once full of love. Was I wrong to wear my heart on my chest for the world to see. Was I wrong to love you with all that I had inside of me.
Tears fall from her face
That is ever so clear
You did not treat her right
You were insincere
You messed with her heart
And played with her mind
Nothing but an insolent demeanor
So degrading and unkind
Do you want to know why dreams are better than reality?
In dreams, you can be with people who you could never be with in reality.
You can hug and hold them with no fear of separation.
Do you want to know why dreams are better than reality?
In dreams, you can be with people who you could never be with in reality.
You can hug and hold them with no fear of separation.
I lost my life to a familiar face,
He went by the name, Past.
He shot me down with bitter memories.
He poisoned me with lies.
The thing about my garden is,
When all the flowers wilt,
I cannot find the strength to
Plant new ones.
-ajh.
it's scary how one bad memory can make you forget all the good ones, how a single word can overweigh a whole book and how one smile can hide a thousand tears.
We used to be inseparable,
But that quickly changed.
When he came along,
By you I became estranged.
Silence was...
Before you spoke.
While still in my embrace
Your voice ended in quiveres.
Asking qurries we both
didn't want to hear the answeres to.
So they stayed rhetorical.
Because I love you..
That means I should spend all my time with you
Forget about my friends
My family
My life
Because I love you..
I should give my all even when you give none in return
Let go of the lies that have been told since birth
Let go of the yells that have been heard through walls
Let go of the memories that wonders your mind
maybe when you left
my tears weren't because i lost you
maybe because i was alone
with my own thoughts
maybe i was in love with the attention you gave me
maybe i was in love with you
What is love
Love is a chemical reaction
Love isn’t black eyes and bruised cheeks
Love is gentle caresses and soft kisses on Sunday mornings
You have to continue on
Even though you have lost a loved one
Remember the good times you had with your mother
She taught you how to be strong
She is still there to guide you
Life isnt the same
You left at the same place you came
I couldn't have any blame
But all I could do was think of your name
You were in so much pain
But its best that you are gone but life isnt the same
A hockey team skates slowly over thin ice.
Lonely but not alone, the goalie stands,
Guarding a meaningless area
That has been assigned temporary meaning.
Her head held high, she takes the puck,
You have consumed my thoughts.
How are you?
You have become a part of my daily routine.
Should I text him?
You drive me crazy.
Why hasn't he replied?
I think I am becoming depressed.
My hands began to shake and tremble as I read the message you sent,
nothing but silence filled the air as my relationship just disappeared.
We were us and now we are; you and me,
Oh ...
I suppose
I'M
The one
Who
Was supposed
To
Fix the
WHOLE
FUCKING
WORLD!
no?
Then
why
isn't
it
done
already?
Nothing is free In the grand scheme of things.
But I want your lies tonight.
Broken men have broken courage it's broken
and miss construed.
And I myself am broken.
So let me have your lies
like glue
I don't like people,
But sometimes you meet
some sweet ones.
Some wonderful people.
Maybe they said "hello"
The way they do.
Or maybe they just showed
you love.
They make the world
I learned the secret to success
Is to push on when you can't.
But my brains are battered
My soul is wet.
My hands are tired,
Please don't forget,
That I tried harder then ever
To no good effect.
Isn’t it Ironic?
It’s sometimes overwhelming having so much to say,
Thoughts filling your head all moments of the day,
You would scream at mom,
as I held my ears closed.
You would sling things,
as I shedded tears.
You used to get angry,
you used to get sad.
If I even said a word,
you would get mad.
Because I love you, you should love me too.
You should honor, appreciate, and cherish me.
Broken Fixers.
This life isn't broken.
It was never a working thing.
The people didn't know.
They cry
She was just sixWhen he told her to fixHis dirty desireRemove the heat of his fire
She was just nineWhen she was toldTo kiss him below the lineBy that gigantic old
Ive been treated with fake love since day 1
the just loved the baby side of me
I was born with short term memory and they didn't want to tell me
knowing that could've helped
instead they lied to me
failed marriage
couple kids to take care of
one named tom
the other named Sarah
1 went with the mom
other with went with the dad
cried herself to sleep
from all the wreckage
I sit alone, think about somethingWhere is my life destined towards?Is it towards what I aspire forOr is it towards what I'm inspired forAll of us can cogitate about itBut no one can declare what is it
She wishes she couldPunch them in the faceThey thought they wouldBeat her in that race
She was somehow silentBut they were raging a warShe had some different scentNow she regrets, she could roar
No one, just no oneNot he, not sheNot them, just no oneListen to youOr they justDon't want to
So stop screamingOh! You don'tJust don'tThat won'tWill help you
Free
Push her to the ground, watch her fall.See how strong you are?She cries from the pain and you just listen to her screams.Over and over again, In her mind, she dies.
Wilted leaves tumble past
Helplessly
In the sun-warmed air
I stare into the sky
Endlessly
Wondering what’s for me out there
When I think of you with another girl
My mind seems to go in a whirl
For I find it so hard to see
That your with her and not with me
I start wanting to cry
Tears start appearing in my eyes
Look at her, Like, you want to praise herAnd not chase herRender her at sightThat makes her face brightIf your look is nullThat will make her Dull
I'm always alone no matter what I do
All my friends that I have
Will eventually leave me soon
All the promises we made, you broke them
All the things we said we were going to do
We didn't
Broken shards of hearts
are dregs at the bottom of the teacup that is life.
But I suppose you always made it ok.
When I was a kid you would sleep in my room,
To keep the monsters away.
Those days were perfect.
The message is there
Words have been unspoken
It is crystal clear
That hearts will sadly be broken
Proper communication
Would definitely alleviate the situation
Those clouds would disappear
Dad, can you help me fix this shit?
I keep trying to build mountains out of nothing,
And you always could fix anything.
I know, you'd pick a shovel up, and help me
Dig my own grave, if only I'd ask.
I feel the wind blowing
Against my fare skin
The cold giving me
Chills up my spine
As I walk the single brick pavement
Gravel grinding against my aching feet
When I see you
I remember the time we met
In the class of grade eight
Your stole the heart of a thirteen year old kid
Giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, no take
I thought that just for once, my heart would catch a break
Break as in rest, but instead the shit shattered
The image is blurred
Spoken words, still unheard
Stop trying to change me
for your convenience.
Pictures and images
you are no longer perceiving.
Unavaible for your viewing
my life wasnt right
all i wanted to do
is grab a knife and
leave it all behind
thinking it would make
things right...not knowing
Once upon a time, I left my dress
In torn pieces on the floor
Where my sisters ripped it off
And left before they did more.
Once upon a time, I left my home
To venture into a one-night dream
We met by the sea
In the billowing greens
By the hanging tree
Where a body was seen
Swaying in summer breezes;
In the tree by the sea
Spot her across the room
Smile, look away
Allow a minute or two to pass
Make sure she’s still there
Something I like to remember when I need to cheer up
Is that I was not a part of the plan
I wasn't thought to be possible
I suppose the only truth i have found,
Is that nobody is in control of anything.
But a lot of people are good at pretending.
We choke the life out of our children.
We say things like, "you need an education"
Never have I asked for this,
A dungeon with a twist.
Never did I want this,
A chain lays heavy on my wrist.
Never could I pondered this,
A life on the list.
It was never supposed to happen,
She believed that it was true, reality.The touch that lead to a warmer sensation inside.The laugh, the voice, the comfort.Complete silence, and pure happiness.She soon found out that it was a moment.
the wavering tree
the rolling stone
the shaking plea
a place called home
a hopeless need
chilled to the bone
a want for warmth
and a shoulder to cry on.
to get out of the storm,
She waits, silently in the lifeless yard. The sky that night, dark and starred. She lays there, waiting, its getting late. When he comes, they'll leave this fate.
I heard your voice
over my morning alarm.
Then it was silence.
I picked myself
off of the hard wood floor,
Got dressed
Reached for the door
and felt you on its brassy doorknob.
Dark grey clouds have filled the skies
Inside my heart dies and cries
The dark grey clouds filled with rain
Can feel my sorrow and my pain
Inside my soul my hope goes cold
Broken from what has been told
Once upon a time;
The most beautiful maiden in the land,
pricked her finger- destined asleep for a cycle of seasons,
was promised life by a challenger of fate.
Approaching the deadline;
You say you think you know me,
But I think that you're confused
Because if you really knew me
You wouldn't say "abused."
You say "locked up, imprisoned,"
Held tight from the inside,
"Once upon a time an angel and a devil fell in love. They started seeing each other and didn't care what anyone will think about them. Till then the gods found out about them and prohibited seeing each other.
Once upon a time
a girl stood in the cold streets
selling her matches.
She was all alone
in the cold winter sidewalk
as adults passed by
Once upon a time
There was one sick wolf,
He walked down a road
Even though he had a cold.
He smelled a stinky pig from a house of straw,
and then he knocked on the door and started to make a call:
Do you remember?
How we used to play pretend?
And giggle and laugh
Until the day's end?
Do you remember?
The many adventures we took
Together as partners,
With every step, the earth shook
I am a wall.
No matter how hard you try
you can not break through this wall.
My emotions are cinder blocks
I cupped you in my hands and i said you couldn't leave.
How silly of me.
You burrowed your way through my ring finger
and fought your way free.
I saw a picture of me and you today.
In the quiet hours before death.
all men must come to terms with their lives.
all the parts, and all the seasons.
they must observe it, regret it, and be proud of it.
depending on who you are,
It is a peculiar and otherworldly feeling.
It is subtle.
Subtle like a touch mark on a knife,
Or a fingerprint on a mirror.
But in the quiet of a silent hour I can feel it.
Okay, let's switch things around
This one isn't gonna be a dumb poem
I promise the next ones will
Then
Death is scary,
because it's that realization when...
When you die
One day gone.
And not even that.
I miss you already.
My throat is sore,
From having to make up for my lungs
My whole chest is left weak
from the gaping hole in my heart.
Please be safe.
Darling a life without you
is a life I don't even want to try to live.
But I will for a little while.
At least untill you retern.
My heart cries,
Killing time.
trying to get people to understand me.
but they can not.
Just like i can not understand them.
Every man is an island.
seperated from all by the oceans of our skulls.
trapped in our heads.
Girl, when we do not communicate with each other properly
We tend to push love away
Joy turns into darkness
Things have got to change
We need to open up to one another
There must be a form of telepathy
She will always be there
She has the voice to encourage and inspire
Your mother may have passed on
But, she is still there to motivate and push you to reach higher
She often showed tough love
I let you inside of my brain,
didn't understand why you caused me pain,
I find myself waking up in the middle of the night,
Trying desperately to feel alright,
There is lead in my bones,
I am rock, alone in the sea,
cemented in sad are others like me;
We are not dead, nor alive,
From such captivity I can't contrive?
Well...I have written all the letters.
So I guess this is goodbye forever,
or at least until I am better.
This mental state that I am in...
I can't even begin.
I hope that the next time you see me
My love:
Listen you don’t have to say a word, hush.
I swear to the stars your eyes make night sky blush.
Scarlet hue washes over the moon till dusk;
A constricted heart,
A lonely cry,
The broken parts,
All want to die.
A lone tear,
Falls down my cheek,
Overwhelming fear,
Makes me weak.
I shake against my binds,
She Wanted by Z. Alarcon
She wanted arms to hold her,
Not hands to behold her
Dark days, long nights;
Through it all, she sat
The stitched wound was ripped open The heart bledIt ached like an earthquakeThat didnt seem to end Breaths waverBody shakes Please save herBefore she breaks
Moments are melancholy
Because lives have been lost
People are in a state of bewilderment
Dithered, confused, and distraught
Nothing but a chaotic scene
Filled with lots of bitterness
I look at you
and I cannot believe
that you don't know
can't feel
my depth of love,
cannot reach your
hand inside my heart
and pull yourself out.
I wonder feverishly
11:11pm I wished for you,
I always wish for you.
I think that's what scares me the most, I cant stop wishing for you.
I close my eyes as the tears roll down my cheeks and a shiver crawls down my spine.
I'm so not ready
for the world to come crashing into my life this morning.
But it never waits for me.
I just want to be with you.
The earth is so pretty.
But it'd be prettier with you.
She grabbed her pearl beads
And her room key
Left her soul in agony
Cold street corners
Search for donors
Empty handed she won’t be
Empty hearted, possibly
Dying slowly, audibly
The more I drink the more my mind becomes numb. I'll continue to pour this posion down my throat until I can forget your name. Until all of the thoughts of you running through my mind is gone.
Take my hand.
We are only as good as the hands we're dealt.
I was there to lift you up.
When I met you I was young,
but you were younger.
I was a senior,
You were a freshmen.
Tip toeing the trail of self destruction
Teetering on the edge on insanity
Submerged my soul in sulfuric acid
Sewed my eyes shut from reality
It's over when you can't break down
Inside I am broken
All but the sound of my heart
Hands grip around my neck, choking
Tearing me apart
I lay emotionless
Listening to the my heart beat
Feeling it pounding in my chest
Are you ok?
"Sure"
Oh... ok.
I said "sure", since when does that mean "no"?
Baby, "sure" is the rape child of "yes" and "No"
I don't know if you'll be ok, but I gotta know,
Will you promise me you'll try?
Blinded by your lies
I trusted you
I should've seen it in your eyes
You were too out of view
All those nights were fun and games
Little did I know I was being played
Crying.
Constant tears.
Cruelty as far as the eye can see.
How come nobody helps me.
How can nobody see.
I’m in pain.
Walk into the work place,
"Nic, nice to see you!"
"You too"
I hate this place.
I hate essence of what it is.
I can not stand for it,
Selling my soul to be your bitch.
She has sadly passed on
Never forget what she taught you
Your mother was always there
She wanted to see you shine your way through
There for moral support
And teaching you never to settle for less
Pain is the feeling I get when I think of you,
You’re gone and you left us behind.
I can’t help but think about what you would be doing,
I taught you how to love me and instead you took the information to use it for herThat's all I was for youA source on how to become better for someone elseIm a used book that got put back on the shelfEverything I ever showed you on how to love was
we started off great
we started off happy
but you started us off with someone else
we started off together
now i feel we are going to end apart
separate
you'll be fine
ill be dying inside
I stood in the spot where we'd make out in my kitchen; where my parents couldn't seeI felt the loneliness in the lack of your presence and couldn't help but think How did we get to this? I thought what we had was love I thought you wanted
He made her feel so alive She yearned for that feeling of joyOnly he gave that to herHer eyes lit up like the night sky at the very sight of himHer heart came out of her chest with every word he spoke and lyric he sangShe felt so alive with him Be
Sometimes I want to feel
Things a great deal.
Other times I want to be
Completely empty and free.
it was here that I fell in love
trapped in the salty waves, burning my skin with the most gentle touch
ripples that altered images dancing in my vision
from an emerald sea to the clearest blue sky
I hope your heart is as a child.
Joyful and full of laughs.
The world is not good,
but there is good out there.
I never asked for it..
you say I'm nothing like your ex's
but that's a lie..
im a bit of both...
I hurt you...
and I cheated...
I didn't want to
I was lost at thought
I used to
Spend every eyelash, every dandelion wish
Hoping for someone to make me feel happy
I used to
Think about you and radiate joy
I used to
B L I N D
I see the way he looks at her
He wants her
He would brighten her
The perfect two
Oh, joy!
Like they were matched
Meant to be
But,
She's too blind!
Each poem I write isn't good enough...
So I wright this.
words press against the inside of my skull,
Something set them off.
I spray these pages with phrases like horse piss.
Then I gain control.
I spun a web from death bead threads.
those dreaded ends of sheets to shreds.
If you see the way that I am going,
My friend you must know where I went.
This is a sad poem,
but it's a beutiful day.
with the blue sky and a breeze
to cast the sad away.
ok.
But I am far to lazy to do anything about it.
I could be working,
I could be strong.
The thunder; it roars in the night resembling my stomach,
for which I haven't ate a thing in days.
Staring at my food, picking around it with my fork.
The wind seems to blow cold sharp shards into my skin.
I am sad
but never mad
no one knows
why
I dont get how
people can smile
when they see
people cry
You used to mean a lot to me, and now you are just a stranger
And the sad thing is that it was my fault we ended this way
04/11/2017
Empty ---
A long road ahead of me,
And thousands’ of miles behind me.
I continue my way,
Until I can see.
My vision is troubled,
My legs are tired,
Your mother may have passed on
But, she is still there
You can here her voice
Telling you to be aware
She loved you unconditionally
Always there to guide and protect
She may have been tough on you
The things we realize we won’t ever obtainOh, it kind of hurts at timesSo far away from each other and I have much to sayyour voice is like flowers and it makes
Don’t tell Depression I’m having an affair with Joy.
Depression knows I’ve been having an affair with Joy.
Does her call make me love Joy less?
Or do I just miss Depression.
Twisting words;
Love is hate,
Let's duplicate.
Engulfed in black,
No fighting back,
The love is gone-
I'm now your pawn.
I grew up where doors had no knobs,And rooms had no doors,And houses had no locks,To keep the monsters out.
Have the strength
To continue on
Think large, take charge
And be heartstrong
Your mother wanted the best for you
For she was always sincere
She may be gone now
But, memories of her are still there
Ivy is born in the Bronx
At 6:04 A.M.
She enters the world wailing,
Falling flat against grimy bathtub in her grandfather’s basement.
You sadly left her alone
With no one to talk to
She often blamed herself
She did not know what else to do
In a state of bewilderment
Withered and confused
Tears fall from her face
We wove a tapestry together and I thought it was beautiful
We were in the center and we were holding hands and all was good.
It wasn’t until after you left that I realised that
My biggest fear
Is to one day never see someone again
And to never know what ever happened to them
Whether they remember me
If they ever became the person they dreamed
If they decided to pack up and move
There's something so poetic about watching everything crumble around you
How can destruction be so artistic, so beautiful?
Seeing everything you attempted to build just fall
It's gone in the matter of minutes
I stand on the corner of Canfield and Clarion.
I search for a familiar car to drive me away.
It is cold; there is no car in sight,
And the wind cuts deep into my soul.
Of a melancholy tone
She lives all alone
With no one to talk to
And nothing to do
She drowns in sorrow
Feeling grim about tomorrow
Sadly dazed and confused
Because, she has been abused
March 3, 2017:
This everlasting darkness has really taken its toll on me
I don't think I can control myself anymore
This is spiraling out of control
So fast that I can't even keep track of wherever I used to be
March 6, 2017:
Sorrowful living is a long, desolate path
It’s where you’ll never really feel complete, but you don’t do much to fight it
Because, though you just want to be happy, you don’t know where to begin
It is crystal clear
She really does not need you anymore
You have tortured her heart
And that is for sure
What more is there for her to say
It truly is over
Nothing but darkness and silence
Here in a room, with a glass full of liquor.
And crushed to know, I desperately do need her.
Standing there, staring right towards a mirror.
Feeling helpless, like a tragic bum filled with anger.
Sometimes you look at me
as though i’ve never kissed a girl before.
I cannot tell if it is pity or love
which causes you to fret over my virgin lips.
A woman with delicate
Crow’s feet framing
Murky blue eyes
Leans heavily against
Her truck.
Everyone says I need to get over you But I can't seem to convince myself were throughWe're doneWe're overJust wish I wasn't sober Wish I could delete the thoughts From my headBut somehow
"I cry salty tears
for inside
I am an Ocean.
So dark and deep
not even monster
make a commotion.
But if you dare
to take a look
you'll surely drown in
all the emotion."
I can see the grass grow higher
-Oh how must this life come easy
To grow as the wind blows
-If only it was as swift to rest in peace
Regret, sadness, depression,
but never hatred.
Guilt, melancholia, sorrow,
but never anger.
Remorse, gloom, heartache,
but never hostility.
Grief, misery, woe,
but never rage.
Even the happiest times are melancholy without you.
Even the sunniest days are dark without you.
Even the warmest blankets are cold without you.
Even the fullest rooms are empty without you.
You often find yourself in a trance
Begging for another chance
She just wants you to go away
There is nothing more for her to say
You played with her heart
Right from the start
Nothing but torture and pain
I was pathetic.I was lost.I wasn’t me anymore…. because of you.
I would indulge in..I would desperately seek.I would want…. alcohol because of you.
Tired of imaginingTired of actingOh, how I wish that was meCat-fishingIs now existingMirror, mirrorWhat is my birth error?Is it my looks or personality?A shame that I desire plastic surgery
I hear her scream
I hear her tiny footsteps in the hallow way
Her shallow breathing quickening my heart
She is an empty shell of the person I knew
Her soft skin that used to soothe me is abused by her confusion
I am from Cadiz,
from the ¨gator pond¨
next to my torn down trailer.
I am from dangerous bike rides,
dodging trees.
From climbing rock cliffs
and pulling off ticks.
A door
A door with chips in the paint,
reminded me much of 2016.
A year full of dread,
for me, that is.
The knob shined as bright as a newborn star,
representing the new year that was yet to come.
Where I'm From by Ryan G.
The ground is where I'm from, born out if the dust and dirt.
I am from my family, and their laughter and love.
2016 started out rough
I thought it sucked just like everyone else
Then you came into my life
Like a bright fire fly
I though my luck had changed
In the middle of a normal day
I find everything so out of the way
Inside myself I am blank and nill
Wondering if I should take a pill.
It is outside of time and space
This reluctant child without a place
Get off of those streets
They are filled with confusion
Just leave those dark clouds behind
Nothing but pure frustration
When you live in a state of poverty
Gloomy moments will appear
Those walls will close
As opportunity passes you by
Darkness is all you will see
There sadly is no brightness in the sky
You have wasted your life
Everything has come apart
Not a great situation
I traded my sorrows for a pretty face
And a bottle
I traded my sorrows for him
And a cigarette to my lips
My sorrows were replaced
Cherry blossoms come to lifeAnd people, hundreds of them sit togetherTalkingLaughingEnjoying themselves
Tight, close, that's what we were.
In our youth, we were always so sure.
We laughed and we cried, but we always stayed together.
We promised we would be forever.
Dear Diary,
Today I saw a kid, who I knew really well,
He’s a straight A student, and… man you could tell.
He’s laughing, and joking, with three other guys.
She is sadly lost
And heading down a corruptive path
Messing around with the wrong crowd
She needs to find herself and come back
Darkness surrounds her incessantly
Family members are concerned for her safety
I think when I actually knew how happy you made me that's when I got scared, but I've always been the one that wouldn't run from the fire, I would run to it. You started promising things that would soon have no hope.
the lines of her hands
whisper of pinky promises
the good
and the bad
the cold nights of tears
broken hearts, hands, love
the days thoughts are smothering
"do you promise?"
"yes."
Abuse
You make me cry the way you talk to me.
It’s like I am crying a storm.
You hit me,
And yell in my face.
Do you?
Do you ever think about me?
Or our past at all?
I really did love you,
I just made a bad fall.
Do you still miss me?
August Forster
written:8/18/16
What do I do?
People tell me to keep my head up.
I try so hard,
I don’t think they see
To my Love Gone
I think of you so much.
I feel myself pressed against your chest.
I can feel your heartbeat,
Even and soothing to the ear.
The Girl
There was a girl,
she was in her middle teen years.
She was so shy,
it was hard for her to find a career.
What I am to you
I am technically single, but my heart is taken by someone I can’t call my own.
From someone who makes me smile, and a voice that leads me home.
You don’t know the pain
Until you are staring at yourself in the mirror
Tears streaming down your face
Wondering where you went wrong
I wish that I can make them happy.
I wish I can make it true.
But I wish that I didn't have to procrastinate, but hey what can I do?
I wish I wasn't so privileged.
I wish they understood.
Katrina DeKett
Papered Love Poem
999.
1 more and peace.
Half over half, color side up.
1 more and peace.
It’d been four years right to the day,Till she had come to see.Her love who’d flown so far awayAcross the deep blue sea. Their hearts had never quivered ever,From the one they most adore.No storm or any violent weatherCould dismay what they bore.
Things have been pretty bland
everyone is busy with plans
all my emails are spam
and my motivation has hit its low
I've got no one to call
I'm staring at walls
All that is left are memories
When a loved one sadly passes on
One never really gets over the loss
But, you must be strong
Never forget what your mother taught you
She always wanted you to do your best
when you're sad
You need to get happy
but when your sadness runs deep
through your bones
through your veins
through your heart
and through your brain
You need to get help
to get happy.
From January to February
I hit a new low in life
Everything was bothering me
All I thought about was the cold blade of a knife
From March to May
I feel as though I’m trapped inside a box.
I try my hardest to beat down the walls,
But the ticking of clocks gets louder.
When you’re young, you’re invincible
There are no consequences
You drive too fast, slurp too many shots, and run faster than your legs want to go
Do you ever get that feeling The feeling of wanting to fly But your wings are broken Every word unspoken Do you ever get that feeling The longing desire to run But your legs are paralyzed Your nerves are tranquilized Tell me the truth As my so
I am broken.
A billion shattered pieces scattered…
Who will put them back together?
Perhaps no one will……..
Shall I remain as broken as this tortured world?
She is no longer there
But, you can still hear her voice
To guide and protect you
And to help you make the right choice
Never forget what she taught you
She was always there
Mother was forever sincere
We shared moments of happiness together
We planned our future
We thought that we would be forever
We loved like each day was our last on this earth
We thought nothing would ever get in our way
What does tomorrow hold?This is the question often asked, but still yet has not been answered. What does tomorrow hold? Let's stop and take a gander. What does tomorrow hold but broken dreams and forgotten promises. What does tomorrow hold? … I'll
This feeling has sunk deep into my soul and I’m afraid that my body isn’t mine anymore.24 hours a day, 7 days a week.There’s no time for resting.This feeling makes me wish that the next day to come unfortunately wouldn’t.
I can't grasp the concept of death; how someone can be here one moment and gone the next.I didn't think a fragile needle had the power to take the lifeof a man who fathered my cousin and had a wife.
When I was younger, I wanted to grow up tohave a love like yours.I promised myself that I would never settle for lessthan I deserved.So, I slept in the beds of boys that didn't care to know my name.
She’s the pretty girl with the perfect life .She plays sports and gets good grades.But one day, everything started to revolvearound a knife.
My life has been hard, this year was no different.
Half way through I realized I'd missed it.
From being comfortable and never alone,
We were left without a home.
In our car is where we stay
When words are left unspoken
Hearts are often broken
You never made yourself clear
Nor, were you sincere
Nothing but a clouded mess
Along with strife and stress
You can no longer take a stand
"...Half asleep, I hear a light rustle outside my window then a sunk on the right side of my bed. You lightly shook me and smiled. As always, conversation turns into an argument.
they cannot breathebut they can seethe trees turn greenand the colorof the lake doesn’tmatter. they rememberthe color
leaving their face,
their body
forgetting
It is quite sad
Nothing but darkness and pain
There was no love to be found
Everything has gone down the drain
That is the price you pay
When a loved one messes around with narcotics
In this house, we eat supper as a family, no elbows on the table,
But remember, keep your emotions neutral, that way you won’t be called mentally unstable,
Who are you? How did you do that? I cried as I looked back in time,
He wrapped his icy arms around my waist, we stood there, intertwined,
I’m constantly holding back tears, I hate the lump in my throat,
I wake up, do my makeup, fix my hair, and throw on my coat,
I walk out the door and into the world,
Here I am everyone, just a lost, vulnerable girl,
It doesn't take much to change a mind,
unless you have one just like mine.
A choice was given to me just last year,
And I could only think "Oh dear, Oh dear."
I had to choose, go left or go right,
recalling bad memories
is like unknowingly walking through a minefield
and suddenly you cant yield
so your mind flies
as your body stays behind
and you know before you see it
People will always be people. no matter how many layers of rose glass we put
between us and them, they will always be people.
My heart is a very deep, unfinished well and at the end, if it ends, is a vividly rusted, old penny I threw in when I was about 7 or so.
Is it called suicidal if it’s not
right this minute that you want to die?
I have a lot to look forward to.
It’s just that, sometimes, I don’t particularly
I lie here and I think about what we could of had,
you were like a puzzle to me that I wish to put together
you always seemed down, and I wanted to bring you up
you seemed to be lost, and I thought I found you
For me it was gold
But for them its dirt
The way they treat
The way they speak
But whatever it is
I doesnt really fit
They came along
That wasnt too long
Both singing a song
I loved to try on your clothes,
the cute crop tops and fuzzy socks.
I loved to sleep in your bed,
to play games on your laptop,
to eat tacos with you and
to talk to you,
Beyond the seas of melancholy,
there was a time I held your hand,
My heart now bears an untold story...
like a ship at sea that longs for land-
A great untruth my lips have borrowed,
Harambe is dead
they shot his head
dat boi is gone
pumped his tire wrong
Cave bob has passed
he became low class
pepe suffered same
he became lame
what did they all do
Mask hides
sad mind
weights pull
I wish to fly
can’t break
chains of pain
toss and turn
lack of sleep
2016 started off great
Plenty of money and plenty of cash
If only I could see my future
And how it would not last
Falling for someone I thought was genuine
Learning his tricks and then going back to him
There are feathers here.
Light, beautiful, no one can
Trust them, they can betray
You, but they're beautiful.
There is cold here.
Excuses wrapped in
Coats that will never
People say they'll be there for you.
But when I cry all night,
What can you really do?
People say they won't leave.
But with what I know,
How can I believe?
I want to smile.
I want to be happy all the time.
I want to have fun with my friends.
That does not always happen.
Life gets in the way.
Who knows how long it will take
until from my deep slumber I will wake.
It's terrible, violence, racists, and poor.
When, at last, will I wake from this horror?
There's people dying, killing, and crying
On a dark-isolated path of alabaster walks a little
broken boy in black. Cold and Loneliness are his only
friends as he walks home. High, high in the fractured black
Tears and heartbreakLaughter and smilesRight and leftAlways together Never separateCuddles and kissesCookies and milkSleeping and dreamingLife keeps them together Because they are pairs
I embrace every word I write
Injecting them with my pain
Let it bleed through and disappear
But every letter brings me grief
Restoring things that shouldn’t be given a second thought
I don't know what I don't know.That is why I never asked questions. All I ever wanted to do is "go with the flow",But then all at once I learned. About you and him,And you and that night,About you and everything I don't agree with.That day felt li
My nail polish is chipping
My lips are cracked
I can’t love you
Too many lines engraved in your skin
My eyes open slowly as the rays of light settle on my face.
I stare at the ceiling,
hoping it would cave down on me as I listen to silence.
The only two beings in the room are me and the elephant,
you always said the wrong thing at the wrong time
you told me it was because you didnt have a filter
but i think it was because you didnt care
i realized that trying to forget everything you said works
Not a good thing
When one lives in poverty
Situations are often dreary
While in a state of uncertainty
There are dark clouds
That appear in the sky
Nothing but somber moments
Let us talk about what makes me feel good.
But this time, I won't share it on
my therapist's green couch or
my psychiatrist's wooden chair
or to myself when I feel myself slowly start to slip.
Aspiring
for that certain ideal vision which
one day i will
Achieve.
Achieved; something is missing.
Something: disillusionment
Something: discontentment
Something: worriment
As a kid
I loved swimming
It was something
That made me happy
As I grew
My love
For immersion
Became fear
As I realized
The mental horror
Of drowning
Why should she stay?
Look at the way how you treated her
She gave you everything
But, you were insincere
You never showed her any appreciation
All you did was waste precious time
She saw the waves crash a storm against cheeksCracking hurricanes into men's eyesDroplets of rain trickled endlessly into puddles of veinsCreating a reserve of rainy day puddles to look back on.
Last night I was dreaming a dream,
You were back by my side
I was happy, but had to wake up, and open the blinds
Sun pouring in illuminated the darkness in life
Dazzling people made of gold,
Dazzling people made of cold
Material, dazzling people made
Of glitter and stuck together with glue.
Dazzling people made of lipstick
Lipstick, kisses, stains on cheeks
My face is wet
not from rain though.
Wiping my eyes with a sleeve
I pick up a guitar
strumming a chord or two,
grab some ink and paper
and sing away the tears
of stress
betrayal
When the day turns blue
I turn on the music
Garth Brooks echos off the walls,
"Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers"
With every note that lifts from the speakers
He eats; he sleeps.
He jumps; he falls.
He thinks, but can no longer recall.
It moves; it beeps.
It can write but not read.
It is the mean.
When it stops moving and beeping,
It's mean when people make money from miseryIt's mean when people make money from my miseryIt's mean when people make money from your miseryIt's mean when peopl
There are some so selfish, egotistical.
There are some, through actions: analytical-
determining suite, of gloom and fright
As if to say: you have no right.
No feeling at all
Nothing to recall
Living my life
Day to day
While others have a ball
Can’t breathe nor smile
Sitting alone
And pondering deep thoughts
Blatantly staring at the wall
She feels so lost
She put her trust in you
But, there was no love in your heart
Nothing but pain and abuse
I've stared out this bus window everyday
Although never memorizing the route I take
only the swirling thoughts
mans my vision blurred with lyrics
You were like an onion
Hard but easy to peel
Wondering how far I should stand away from you before cutting you
Before you start to make me cry
Again
Knowing you make me cry everytime
It has been fifteen years
Since that dark and gloomy day
We as a nation were attacked
Nothing but total turmoil in every way
Thousands sadly lost their lives
There were painful hearts
if you ever miss me
and hesitate if you should call
to tell me or not...
just whisper it to the wind
and let it carry your words on...
maybe i'll be able to feel the coldness of your heart then
She will find her strength
And simply walk away
You have abused her a lot
Your heart has gone astray
She sadly drowns in tears
Because, she had put her trust in you
You never gave back to her
What do we fear the creepy crawlies under our bedor is it the wondrus voice inside our headkilling my thoughts until braindead
You were my life and, my light.
Then came that cold, dark night
Now the only time i see your face is in the pictures of this old place
Without you, i dont know what to do
Why did this happen to you?
She is brokenhearted
You have torn her apart
You were never there
Right from the very start
Tears are falling from her face
Nothing but mass confusion
Living in a state of turmoil
The monsters of our mind Chasing usNever letting go
The demons of our soulCapturing usTaking us hostage
The ghosts of our heartAre just bits that remainAnd shadows of what was
Not looking is so hard, but,
Why, pray tell, is it so hard?
I just can't seem to let you go.
It seems near impossible
Not to look.
Not constantly search
For your angelic face throughout
Darkness will surround you
If you are not careful with your path
Get it together
And take your life back
The streets are no place to live
For they are filled with confusion
I remember long ago
when when every summer day
you would give me a yellow rose before we played
I remember long ago
when fall was on the rise
you would come to school, with dew drops on your eyes
The walls were closing in on me.
Frustrated and furious significantly.
A grey cloud of despair, can't you see it in the air?
Where are you right now? You said you would always be there.
I was there for you
I gave you my heart
I was not aware that I was just fixing your heart
So you could go give it back to her
Just to be broken
Again
I used to think missing someone was the worst pain
It was the worst thing you could possibly feel
Here I am
7 months after you left
I realized that missing someone does hurt
I am jealous.
Why does anyone romanticize this
I belive you to be to good for me
I belive you are the stars and galaxies
I am never violent or disrespectful when I am jealous
You will never realize how much he ruined you
When you start talking to someone new; it will hit you
You will not realize until someone tries to do something he did
You will always think about missing him being there
I will never understand something
How can you smile all day long and cry yourself to sleep
Pictures never change but people in them do
How your bestfriend can become someone to hate
I never really understood this,
You were my "person" , meaning that i'm in love you with you, wantint you
You are in love with another person, wanting them
My heart used to skip a few beats because of you
Its 3:00am and here i am still awake
I keep crying and overthinking, but most of all regret
You're even in my dreams, thats why I can't sleep
I know that i'm fucked up, and I know i've made bad choices
Cryptic and puzzling
Hard to understand
No one could figure it out
Nor did they have a plan
What we have here
Is a mystery
Nothing but dark clouds
Filled with ambiguity
the dead leaves know so little
the swine and their eager snouts
scour the pile, although too brittle
swarming minds with no doubts
Alone I was when I sat underneath the trees Somewhere far in an abandoned park
A slight wind came as a cold breeze
A girl. Eleven years old. Same girl. Twelve years old. Same girl. Fourteen years old. Same girl. Eighteen years old. What do they have in common? They have brown hair. They love to sing.
In a day are so many sad hours
You may think I'd spend them alone
But I give love to happy flowers
And they make me feel at home
It's never is your intention
But it happened nevertheless.
Now your joyous arrival
Leaves me in distress.
I am angry with reason
I am sad with distress
I am disappointed with hope
A windowsill
Teetering on tea boiling in a pot
And musicians hissing about politics
Legal highs and all time lows
Screaming foxes and gunshots
***This was written during a dark part of my life and don't worry I am totally fine now and these thoughts are no longer a part of my mind***
Every dayIt's like they're embarrassed and ashamed.Like they don't want anyone to knowAbout my existence, and that takes a toll.
There they go making plansTo meet up and celebrate as friends.They talk to one another like I'm not there.I'm just an invisible nothing with no one who cares.
Salt is an accessory, not to be consumed aloneBut, salt is bitterShrewd white crystals that should be used in moderationBut I ate too muchClumps grasp at the walls of my throat
There was once a boy, in the 1700s
who survived in his house's basement.
Stuck he was,
for the sadness exhausted his will to go out side.
His mother too, for she was distraught at the idea of bearing a 'mad' son.
I give my mom a hug and feel nothing. No happiness, no love, no comfort. I want to repel away. She looks at my face with worry as she sees the absence of care on my face. She sees my dark eyes and straight smile.
If I hit a low again
In the witching hour
from the dark room where I lay awake all alone,
and I’ve gone so numb I can’t feel the aching cold
I speak supreme no need for dreams
Way too big for my Jean's
Sent from a heart that has been broken.
So the ones eye has freak don't run
Arose/ from broken boulevards, story tragic
When you avoid responsibility
It clearly shows that you do not care
Just open your eyes
You need to be more aware
Opportunity will pass you by
There will be nothing for you to gain
You will lose everything
The rose is mineI cherished itIt's something sacred and uniqueSome give it up so fastGive it away at any momentTo a boy or a girl
Plunging into the abyss
Of your pretend security,
Blanketing the truth
Of your own pain,
From me.
I handed you just myself,
My soul,
My heart.
And you trampled it
Like an egg.
I've been here before.
Desolate feelings creep in
before I get a chance
to close this door,
once again.
Reading excerpts of his cherished poems,
As the ocean breeze fluttered past our noses offering the smell of salty water,
He taught me many lessons.
She can clearly see
That you really do not care
There was zero communication
You were never there
She sadly drowns in tears
At the distorted connection
Such a horrible sight
Some dreams are worse than others,
but they're all the same,
a passage to a better life,
it's difficult to explain,
whether by knife or by rope,
either way,
i couldn't cope,
She did the best that she could
And really tried to understand
But, you were never there
You just disappeared
She sadly did not turn to anyone
There was no father figure
Lots of darkness and ambiguity
She was my friend.
Blonde, green-eyed,
Fair skinned and delicate.
She was perfect in more ways then one.
And I fell for her.
She was a flower,
Beautiful and dainty.
Last night
I had the misfortune of seeing you
in my dreams
you looked at me with your sad eyes
that gleamed
then the clouds began to cry
I don't know...
I can't shake the preening feeling...
That I'm not really living...
And even though it's not a physical pain-
It's a dull persisting ache-
And even though no one else is living
Best friend falls for best friend
a classic
sometimes tragic
rarely as magic as movies
but people love the possibility in familiarity
at least when it's she and he
but it was her and me
A is for air force. It’s Captain Briggs in the jet. The toughest and proudest man that you’ve ever met.
B is for ball, “why can’t you catch?” Dad grumbled as I shaped my small hands for the next.
I wonder if she still sees me
as I do
As the girl in the rain
Crying silently
Tears scarring the earth
in small rivers
There are times when I think she does
And my heart breaks
The memories burn my heart like the alcohol that runs down my throat every 1am that I can't sleep
And I can't sleep because the thought of you keeps my mind wandering
And the thought of you is so beautiful, it hurts
Depression is like a black curtain over your face
You can not see a thing
And day after day
For two years
I felt that
There was no way out, no way to be happy
After you destroyed me
I wanted to cut off your hands
Rip your fingers to shreds
Tear your lips off of your face
Gouge your blue eyes from their sockets
Slice your legs to bits
This one is for the kids
with no more hope
No more purpose
Broken smiles
Shattered teeth
The kids who fall short of their dreams so closely
they scrape them with their fingertips
If only it were light
That you desperately needed,
But it's not.
I'd light up your world
So you'd have to spin around
And rethink it all--again
But the tragedy is
You're gone
My mind explodes with hatred. I was only told of the awful memories. I was only told of the abuse. My mom wanted to protect me from the bad. I was forced into a game of hide and seek except there was no one looking for me.
You don't know how much it hurt
When you came home collapsing.
Words slurred together into a sentence,
At least that's what I think it was.
You stumbled like a baby taking its first steps,
Countless hours
Harmony in my head
Words of life
Don't send me to bed
Stay up with me
Keep me company
I am the quiet stream
But you're the babbling brook
speak in sense
This was a visual poem that I had worked on about a year ago as a class project.
The poem is about the overall feeling of being alone that may come with moving onto new things or new places.
One step to the left and,
Already dead
I pull-poked the wonderings out of my head.
They slimed and they slithered
Into the pool
To recreate moments of frivolous drool
That deemed little merit
I'm sitting here.
Again I'm alone.
I'm trying to escape
Escape from the hurtful words and the voices in my head.
My headphones are on and my music is up.
Here I sit.
I'm by myself.
I hear you words everyday
in somhow in some way
you say you aren't controlling me
but I am trapped I'm not free.
You degrade me in public
call me names to make me feel pychotic
<p>I'm no longer in step like a marching band member off his countsI'm no longer in the program like a singer cut from the choirI'm no longer in the loop like a roller coaster off of its tracksI'm no longer with the conventional crowd anymor
Biten whole, broken sand and sole, shreds of something they
said
Love-and-loss: same breath, same bed.
Forget the good and its sunny smile
-
'Cause
-
you-and-me were all I had
He sailed out to sea to fish a day's wage but the sea did not like him and threw him in rage. The waves got so tall and the sails got so taught, that the little old sailor gave up his day's plot. He huddled down low filling buckets with water to d
Good morning, they say
And I'll say it back
But I still desire unconsciousness
Not because I need the rest
Although I do
But I stay on my feet anyway
Aware of my struggle to
I wish I was a bird.I could fly far away and never come back.I would finally be happy, and this depression I have I would finally lack.I would soar higher than any bird has before.
I wish I was a bird.I could fly far away and never come back.I would finally be happy, and this depression I have I would finally lack.I would soar higher than any bird has before.
Is today that day
The day so dreadful to me
Where you took my heart
And shattered it to millions
Then burying with your lifes
Have you ever felt alone?Like there's all these people around you at work or schoolSmiling and laughingWith their friendsAnd theirBest friends.
You’re a fragile spirit, afraid to leave the grave of which you were laid to rest.
Metaphorically, of course…
Flowers used to grow in your veins and now they’ve long withered away and died.
I can't do it
I can't walk back in there
What if I still get hit?
They still won't care
They still call me fat
I'm still ugly
They'll slam me on the mat
I'm trying...
I can't do it
I wish I could have saved you
From falling for a broke thing like me
Because I can see it in everythng you say and do
That the shards left of your heart aren't free
And this isn't what I wanted
the windows are open
yet no air comes in
a girl is smiling
yet her happiness doesn't spread
we open the book
but the pages are blank
though if they were filled
I had a math teacher
When I was in eighth grade
We' d hang out at his house
And play video games
I thought it was a little strange
I thought he was weird
But, he let us smoke weed
He whispers to the moon,
Have you really seen it all?
The wars and the terror and the art
Seen the righteous killed and the sadists born
She's drowning
It's heavy
Weighing her down
Realizing
Long ago
That she can't
Swim
Feeling weightless
But the bad kind
That makes you
Feel like a shadow
Like air
Being free from my thoughts is something I've found impossible to do.
I feel as if my mind is caged like the animals at the zoo.
I want to be able to conquer my hindering fear, but the demons in my head are incredibly near.
Quite the breeze boy
I still wonder why i came here
Im over dramatic and spastic
Holden on the hope to home
Im sitting on the stump gotta name these tears
Iv gotta get out of here
If I could
I would
Go back in time
When we first met
I would look at you
With different eyes
I would thank you
While we sat at a table
Alone
In front of the school library
I'm just soakingin itJust counting theminutesBlood stained water in the tubIt's hardly the time nowis itWhen you're breaking a
Today is her first birthday
On the twenty-first of May.
She looks beautiful on a 3x5,
But I’m a million miles away.
I’m a million miles away,
the artist who drinks thier own blood,
is the first to taste the salt,
flavor to enhance the taste,
seasoning to please the guests,
our blackest paints add the deepests contast,
It seems now a days im having more dreams
Were im falling straight down
No destination in sight
No light to guide
Sometimes I wish I would just reach the end
Cause it seems more and more these days
A little girl or boy, an innocent child of barely any age.You had a life ahead of you, some would be police officers, some would be nurses,Some would be musicians, and others teachers.Your life was taken, taken away.
When Robbin Williams died,Suicide,My family sighed saying, that's just how things are sometimes.
The sky exposes my melancholy and distress,
I won't be the girl next to you in a white dress.
Why did you ruin our dreams?
Perhaps it was a nighmare in reality and woke you up in screams.
I think.
I cry.
I cut.
I die.
But you don’t even care;
That I’m not here anymore.
You can tell me that I suck,
But that won’t change the fact,
A glance too long in the
wrong direction. Addiction
seeps into my core.
Where is my fix?
Your
Mind much too far from mine,
Has vanished without a
trace, leaving me barren.
Mayhaps it found a better place,
Somebody who wants it.
I
I used to think it was normal
To cry for three hours about nothing.
That it was normal
To think about dying at least once a day.
You didn't raised me
You left. Because I wasn't your problem
I gave you chance after chance when you came crawling back
But you were stubborn & pride was more important than your flesh and blood
You left me.
I am numb to the words in my head all the time,
But I'm still feeling lost and lonely inside,
My friends can have fun and live their own lives,
While I'm stuck in the mirror feeling broken inside,
The nightmares don't end when I turn on the light,
My thoughts prevent me from my rest in the night,
So harsh and so cruel not a good thing to say,
They leave me so nervous to take on the day,
such a strange wave
how things ended this way
each night the rain poured
and I still waited for you at my door
love is for fools
but it isn't when it's for you
I want to be beside you
There is nothing but a dark path
When a person engages in substance abuse
Your world comes crashing down
There is sadly everything for you to lose
All hope will fade
Nothing ever seems right
Tears falling by nite
Smiles rising by day
Wanting to express yourself, but not really knowing the way
Glass shattered, pain misunderstood
People telling you to change, because change is good
wrap myself to keep me together at each side each and every morning carefully reapplied out of tears and pain the cloth is spun and throughout the day it comes undone some days i do a messy job my hands shake and my head starts to throb my smil
wrap myself to keep me together at each sideeach and every morning carefully reappliedout of tears and pain the cloth is spunand throughout the day it comes undone some days i do a messy jobmy hands shake and my head starts to throbmy smile begin
silent and invisible it grabs hold of my lips it begin's pulling me down to the darkest depths shaking hands rest on my thighs my mind is twisted and full of lies shattered is each bone broken is all that ive known curious, my minds wandering u
You lost a diamondpiece
You sadly abused her
Treated her like she was nothing
When she gave you everything
There is no one to blame
She gave you many chances
Forever she will disappear
Every time I look to my watch, on my wrist,
I see the scars that remind me of my past,
The cuts that haunt my dreams,
The memories that will forever be there,
Reminding me that all I was in life is an failure,
Hand me a pair of scissors
I’ll cut the steel ropes
That led straight to your heart
At least I’ll try
If only I could get closer to you
That end of the rope is the thinnest
I'm chomping at the bit
Claiming validityUp on my soapbox, a leaderThe more swelled our tongues became
I'm chomping at the bit
Claiming validityUp on my soapbox, a leaderThe more swelled our tongues became
I was in a big city
And got a hotdog from a street vendor
It taste sooooo good
Ketchup, onions, chili and cheddar
As I walked home with a smile
My stomach started to dance
Little music box
please keep turning
your all I have
and all I need.
Please darling
I know you have been dropped
and left empy
but i promise to wind you up forever
Girl, why do you tolerate the mess?
You really do not need to deal with nonsense
You sadly let time waste to the side
Lots of pain and sadness you continue to hide
He never really appreciated you
My mother is special.
That’s what they say
When they drag me away
From that shiny white room
And I ask if I may
The sweetest kiss of twilightA crimson rose or threeLost in the moment loveA moment with out theeIs no moment at all The tender kiss of yours dearA crimson rose or twoLost in the moment love
1000 memories and they’re all colored blue
and the darkest shade appeared the day I met you
I never thought much of it, never bothered me nun
Shake and bake you toke and bake
We talk until we see the rising sun
Darkness is what you will see
When you follow the wrong crowd
Life will sadly pass you by
No one will want to come around
Your issues with substance abuse
Will put you on a path of nowhere
Carved it out of my heart, Blood dripping down my hands, I don't understand myself,I don't understand you,
She may be gone
But, you can still hear her voice
Your mother was always there
To help you make the right choice
Let her voice be heard
She wants you to do your best
Broaden your world
I am cold, stubborn, and reckless.
I am sad, skinny, and wild.
I am timid, honest, and loud.
I am forgetful, ignorant, and tired.
I have failed at being a daughter.
The early morning found us
sitting on your
tattered, burgundy, mattress cover.
Me, focused and writing.
You, scatterbrained and distracted.
You reminded me of our lives at seven.
Find it in you
To carry on
Losing a loved one is hard
But, you must have the will to be heartstrong
Cherish all the memories
And wear your heart on your sleeve
Think of the grand moments
And now your heart is hurting
And I feel it too
As mine has always
Been hurting for you
I look back and feel sad
and then it makes me mad
because you never considered what we could’ve had
You don't need my confession
To know that I'm struggling with depression
it follows me everywhere I go
and I wish it wouldn't show
I can bury my face in other things
How do I fill this void
I have tried distractions and diversions
But I am still a very sad person.
I try not to lose my writing passion
And that day I went to bed
but I never slept
because I could never sleep
without the part of me you kept
There's a brick wall that only we can see
and it's my fault that it came to be.
With a torch I set the bridge to flames
and then looked for someone else to blame.
I have been put down
In the harshest of ways
And I cannot frown
Because it is not you who deserves the blame.
The boy stood at the edgeHe looked up and down, side to sideHe just wanted to end the fight the one he called his life
Girl, why waste your time
And fight all of his lies
He has used and abused you
He never cared to see you cry
But, you stick by his side
Hoping that he would change
You will suffer through more pain
It is done
I have lived my life
I have had my children
I have built my house
But it is done
As I lay in this rose
Sweet and soft
Silky yet sorrowful
All the while knowing
When the pain sets in and your heart begins to sink, you almost forget you were born a human and not a robot as the weight suddenly becomes too heavy to hold. As you bite down on your quivering lips and inhale through your nose.
GunshotsWho could it be?I picture a student in ill-fitting clothing and unwashed hair.What kind of rifle? Is this how I'll die?What will I say when I beg for my life? I stop breathing. Eyes are frantic My heart sinks like lose change.I Imagine all
You and me
Were never meant to be
All the memories
Make me forget how to breathe
I can’t even look at myself
because I’m not sure if I’m me
you,
with your dark brown hair
and your green eyes
made me feel
like i
was the only girl in the world
and you
the only boy
and yet
why,
oh why
in a perfect world, the sky would be in a
perpetual state of beauty, the sun
always in set, the sky whirling
with pinks and purples of many shades,
the flowers always in bloom, creating an
My best friend,
memories are kept with me.
Why’d it have to end?
My successes I send,
flying free.
My best friend.
My art teacher used to say.
“Don’t add the black paint until you’re ready for a finished product”
and I never listened.
So I painted with my black paint
Lifeline
The EKG spikes and flat lines
All I hear, are my beagle’s whines.
As I lay here trying to survive
You could say that he was a Carpenterof sorts ---he built heartsfrom the outside in fixing rebuilding with his own parts, making a sacrifice just to hear their laughs just to see their smiles so that his own mind, his own soul could just possibly
Words only mean so much
They mean nothing without action
Time will pass on
And unexpected events will happen
Day becomes night
Tides will turn
Moments will simply become a memory
The lady falls like the dying leavesSoft and slow, forlorn and sweetOn a whim, she gives her heartWanting only to play her partYou speak, she hangs on every wordYou smile, she burnsYou touch, she shivers
It has always struck me as odd,
the idea that “loving you” and “losing you”
are only one letter apart.
This small difference is proved
Something in my heart is suffocating
Alive still, but slowly fading
This feeling of something dying
With constant pain and trying
Why won't someone love?
Why won't someone care?
That cruel winter day, she knew, would be filled with hate,
That one, single day would determine her fate,
If they smiled, or stared,
How much she wishes they cared,
As they laugh and call her names,
Happiness is the outcome to unquenchable tears which came because of struggle.
The world is sad, the world is bad.
You have that grin that makes me smile,
Even after I feel that I have just ran a mile.
You are the reason I wake up,
You were my favorite little pup.
Your the image that brings me warmth,
So on, and so forth.
Everyday is Hell.
Everyday I go through the motions
I engage in the small talk
I try my best to socialize
Everyday my head is filled with fog
Girl, you gave him a lot of chances
But he threw them all away
His heart was never into you
He broke your poor heart in two
There was nothing but frustration and pain
Simply nothing for you to gain
She writes about him in a five dollar notebook
Saying that she loves him so
His hands are placed at the nape of her neck
while his love was gripping her throat
the rainfall drenched the old oak tree
it was late september
i felt it was a sign
and when im with him
and he's listening
but not responding
i took it as a sign too
and then i realized
It is rather sad
When a person wastes their life away
They had every opportunity to make it happen
But, they sadly chose to be led astray
Their loved ones are now in a state of bewilderment
shake off this feeling
it's just a phase
but my heart takes a beating
when I catch your gaze
the time that he's stealing
my sould it does raze
but since I know your feelings
Like a bill collector
Death keep calling
I owe him something
But I'm not sure what
Some days I ignore him
Some days I talk
But no matter what
He's coming
Eyes red, dried tears on her cheeks;
On the roof she sits with pen and paper
Describing the beauty of the street lights
The sound of the rustling trees
poison tears
Rain, rain, go away,Because of you the pain will stay.Slit my throat, cut out my heart,Leave me here, tear it apart.
You hear and yet you do not listen
I know this because I watch your eyes
They glaze over, stare blankly at me and I realize you don't care.
I shouldn't be surprised.
I knew I had it bad,
when they asked what I would need
if I was stranded on a island,
and the first thing I thought of,
was your blue eyes instead of water.
Isn't that sad?
All I need is someone to take care of me.
Someone to be patient with me.
Someone to hold me, feed me, and change me.
Someone to teach me and play with me.
All I need is a bicycle!
No words can express the hurt
The pain and disbelief
A country under attack
People around the world are in grief
Lives are sadly lost
Things can change in the blink of an eye
This goes to show you
At night I feel you hold me,Whispering all the things you never told me.When I wake up you'll be goneBut for now, I dream on.
oh hi
how's it going
i'm fine
nevermind
i'm dieing inside
i'm not strong enough
Just too weak
but i'm supposed to be strong
And as he waits on the spire of the human soul,
End watches.
A woman stands outside and stares
across the rugged buildings to the early sunset. It’s a lot of blue
covered over with whispy clouds,
Charismatic and charming is he,
who steals my love only to flee.
He who shines as bright as day,
takes my heart but doesn't stay.
Arrogant and scheming is he,
who picks my flaws and laughs at me.
One
My heart skips a beat
He's beautiful. Perfect. Positively sweet.
I only wish that we might meet.
But perhaps I wouldn't be able to take the heat.
Not if my heart keeps beating so quick.
My hunger survives off your belligerent smile, as it puts the blazing sun up in my sky
It's those nonsensical possibilities you whisper which floods my being with your eyes
Windows rattle and walls shake
Coldness stings and stomachs ache
But no amount of money could ever buy
The love that's share between you and I
Poverty strikes like lightning bolts
Your crystal clear eyes are the first eyes I've ever been able to keep contact with. Your soft touch entrances me, your arms are my home. Your warm body seems to fit with my cool soul. We find that happy medium, you are my safe haven.
Shakespeare once said that “it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”
But he couldn’t predict the empty nights laying in bed wishing you were next to me.
Though I am sick, and I am scared
I know my heart must be repaired
I need to see the world once more
A simple chance that I ask for
"Why do you love me?" I ask.You reply with many reasons,some of which being how When I talk about my favorite book,I always obsess over the characters and my eyes take on a whole new formas big as dinner platesand they sparkle like the fourth of
The girl huddled in the corner
She knew once they were here they would take her
She would meet her entirnal fate
Baby, yeah I see you growing up in the ville
Messing round with these hittas
Knowing none of them ain't real
They blowing up your phone
Talking bout they want to chill
Trying to get up in your pants
tearing up inside me
fire and tigers and rage and roars
threaten to rip my limb from limb
but i don't have a word
i say i'm mad
i have that word i say i'm mad
She said she's sorry that she made him ashamed
To be vulnerable and open
Since she's been living that way
It was imparted on she, so to him she did the same
She never knew that the girl that she wanted to be
There was something about the pink walls of my childhood bedroom that I hadn't noticed until I had to bid them goodbye
The blue carpeting caught the tears that fell
And I shut the door
Hoping to delay the inevitable
please listen to the silence of my heart
so you, my love, may be spared from the grief
It consumes all my thoughtsTakes over my bodily functionsIt's overpoweringRuling with society's corruptionsThe darkness devouring
I want a guitar now, don't know how to play the thing;I tried once before but gave up when I broke a string. I want to make some music, make some kind of noise shed,Something that can reflect what's going on in my head. Something that knows what's
Oh, you're sad?
Please don't be!
There are so many things to be happy about, you see.
There are so many places to go!
You can go to a tree,
To a garden,
Or a fair,
You can go anywhere!
She wept
As the fire danced
and the smoke filled her lungs
The crackles of the embers
sang her a song
As her essence left her body
and she closed her eyes
And dreamed of all the good
I often spend many a sleepless night,
Wondering if I could make things right.
I know of your hatred of me,
She called herself the Art Whore.
For she saw art in everything and
anywhere.
The crack in the wall that had been
there since her father had slammed
her head against the wall was art and
How strange it is to see you here, even after all these years?
Come, have you, to see me now, to see me lying in my cask?
Have you come to mourn me now, or have you to degrade me once more?
Second place
The backburner
The fault bearer
Worthless
Stupid
Idiot
Liar
Anorexic
Twig
Bird
In the background
I silently watch as work takes over
Once upon a time,
In a kingdom far away.
There was a mistreated maiden
And to her dismay they teased bout her shoes and her hair everyday.
I'll let you in on a secret
So tell everyone else
I'm the ugly sweater,
I'm just there so you may laugh
I'm the ugly sweater,
I'm here on your behalf
I'm the ugly sweater,
I've always been the same
I'm still the ugly sweater,
This feeling sining into my chest
It feels as though someone has cut me open and poured in hardening cement
I don't even know what is running through my brain
I suppose now, I have really gone insane
Emerald amber mixes in between
the eyes that I stare into, and pray I am unseen.
Glass fogs and the words appear
to be smudged into my quaking fears.
Nose curved like a bell
Your mother may be gone
But, you can still hear her voice
She is there as a guide
To help you make the right choice
Visions of her
Are still with you
She will forever be in your heart
All around her,everything she's ever touched,everyone she's ever met,has faded to the black.
All around her,everything she's ever wanted,everyone she's ever loved,has died.
my teeth chatter at the sound of your name
my eyes close tightly and I hear the whispers from before
you’ve ruined me
A woman
Tall, intelligent, and free
Not only took care of herself
But took care of me
Eighteen kids
And a legacy left behind
So I’m actually stranded here on this deserted islandIt’s kind of ironic how many times I played that game when I was youngerWhere you pick three objects to bring with youThe heat is unbearable
Yelling and crying.
Screaming and dying.
This is the circle of my life.
Why try?
Every time you get happy,
Life becomes crappy.
This is the circle of my life.
You should prove your allegiance by looking me straight in the eyes,
and telling me that what we had meant the world to you.
Although no matter how your pupils attract me I know you’re all lies
Find the strength to carry on
In spite of the loss of a loved one
Just remember the lessons that she taught you
And see your way through
She always wanted you to do your best
Reach out and grab success
What is the point?
If there is no trust or communication
The bond will break
And there will be mass frustration
Nothing but clouded matters
Because words are unspoken
Just open up to one another
I’m asleep oh so gentle, so calm. I wake up to a touch on my arm. I jump up scared thinking he’s back, I then notice the feeling was myself touching my arm. “Anyone there?” I ask frightened.
It's hard being funny. They wait for you to ease the tension. "You make awkward situations comfortable!" You cool the place down with an allegory that's so random they'll reminisce about it for weeks.
Deterioration of the mind,
It's but a state of strained helplessness,
As I urge you to do what builds you up,
But tears me down.
You tell me that I should learn to be selfish,
To take what I want,
She cannot go on
Her heart is frozen
You have sadly hurt her a great deal
Because she is heartbroken
You never showed her any appreciation
Nor, did you really care
Her eyes are now open wide
Dark and gloomy
Along with mass confusion
Quite esoteric
This only adds to the frustration
Nothing but a chaotic scene
With the loss of a life
The little children no longer have their mother
When living in the streets
Your future is uncertain
Anxiety and fear surround you
You are always unsure of what to do
Just a sad state to be in
You are just asking for trouble
Try to find yourself