Merry Christmas Darling

We’re apart as you planned

And every day is full of pain

Since you’re holding a different hand

 

Christmas doesn’t feel the same this year and I’m not sure if it’s because I thought I’d be spending it with you or because everyone else told me not to

 

Your love is hard, and cold, and everything I told myself I wouldn’t fall for again

And I realize your love was never mine

Your love was just a dream I had each night

 

It’s Christmas again.

Another year on my own

But I don’t miss your voice tonight

I don’t miss your hands

 

I miss the person who once missed you

I miss the man I was before he died

Before you broke the glass half full

And I miss the water I lost

 

I have so much pain and so little hope

I’ve begun to wonder who this poem is really for.

Typing away trying to forget you

Or convince myself not to love you

 

But time is a cruel invention

And memories can last forever

Teaching myself to ignore the storm

That some stories are better left untold

 

Do not forget that it is Christmas

That there are cookies in the kitchen

That Santa Claus is on his way

And that all I want for Christmas is to be ok again.