Why is it that I only feel safe here,
In hospitals, locked away from all my fears?
Why is this my favorite place to retreat?
Why is it only in places like this that I can feel complete?
Why is this air so pleasant to breathe,
But anywhere else the rig and the pipe are all I need?
So here I sit, in the garden of peace and pain,
Wondering if there's anything in this life worth trying to gain.
So I sit here, in the garden of pain and peace,
Asking the doctors to PLEASE,
Tell me how this suffering can be eased.
Explain why I see life as just a tease.
Or why when I cut, the wounds don't bleed.
Have I gone forever numb?
Is dead inside what I was destined to become?
Can I stay in this hospital forever?
Or is it possible that I can truly get better?
I feel so safe here,
In this hospital, locked away from my fears.
Medicated, from even my mind I retreat,
Running from the part of me that feels so incomplete.
Running from the world, the normal air people breathe.
Please doctor, tell me what the fuck I need!
- Jarred Shah