Empty

It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise.

• Lemony Snicket; The death of a loved one.

I miss you when I can’t sleep,

and the birds begin to sing.

I can only think of you, snoring

as little dreams animated sweet

paws, and feet of silk

in the soft light of dawn that spilled

through the blinds into our space.

I miss you, little sunshine.

When I get ready you aren’t there staring,

sitting on the floor so stoic and serene,

and your tail doesn’t swish

back and forth, pondering sweetly

what are you doing, mom?

Our room is quiet, a stillness

fell here when you left, and stayed.

Unbearable things took your place, silence

so deafening that I can’t hear myself scream.

What am I doing?