I Don't Know What To Do

And just like that, I found myself in the same situation once again,

Torn between cutting you out of my life, or keeping you around as just a friend.

You can't tell me that you didn't think of me the same way,

Through the conversations that we would have the things that you would say. 

But now, once again, it feels as if you are playing games, 

And I am wishing that I never even asked you your name.

I hate that these people I fall for keep coming into my life just to leave as soon as I start to feel,

That there is something between us and that it is starting to feel real.

I find it suspicious that you are talking to me when you claim that there is another,

Because the way we have been talking has been like no other.

Maybe I read it wrong, and you are not as good of a guy as I thought,

And you are just happy that your ego is getting a boost from the feelings that I caught.

With everything that is going on, this time something inside of me broke,

And when this whole thing felt like love to me, it ended up just being a joke.

A joke that for once in my life someone I wanted actually felt the same,

But in the end, I know that I am the only one to blame.

I know deep down that you and I can't just be friends,

And I also know that all good things must come to an end.

It was fun while it lasted, being happy for the first time in a while,

Because after being sad for so long, you were the one who brought back my smile.

This time, that smile is gone, and I don't think it will ever return,

Because this time there is no coming back from this deep of a burn. 

I wish you nothing but the best, but I am not going to repeat my same mistakes from the past,

Because I know that when good things come into my life, they never seem to last.

I wish you nothing but the best, but this is the end for you and I,

At this point, I am so used to it playing out like this, I feel like I have no tears left to cry. 

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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