betrayal
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I pull the curtains close
No crack of light
to penetrate the dark
of endless night
Love's a light you say
as you stroke my face
But I in darkness stay
in your embrace
In my embrace, I’ll hold you tight.
Snug and warm, I watch you sleep.
My arm turns numb where you lay your head.
I can’t feel my hand anymore either.
I sold my life to you
I let you be responsible for my actions
I trusted you
With my whole life
And you took advantage
You hurt me
Getting hurt by you
Was like being hit with a ton of bricks
My relationship with my mother
Has been a series of trust falls
And she's never once caught me
.
But I keep leaning backwards
And hating myself
When I inevitably hit the ground
.
The smell of sand.
The feeling of peace.
The edge to cry for absolutely no reason.
The cravings...the need to be held.
A kiss on the forehead
Is a gesture of betrayal
It's not a kiss of love
Filled with joy and humor.
Un baiser sur le front
Est un geste de trahison
Ce n’est pas un bisou d’amour
Empourpré de joie et d’humour.
I seek truth in your eyes,
find lies I never knew existed
and wonder
how stained is your soul?
I wish to discover purity
caged within you,
to dig deep until I can uncover
the purpose of deception.
I know you're in love
With a certain someone
'Tis just a matter of time
Before I find out who
You're trying to hide
No, you can't from me
'Cause if you're in love
I feel that too.
Haiti (Ayiti, Bohio, Quisqueya, Saint-Domingue)
Is a long ago
Kidnapped country
Before the parturition of the harmful bayonets
Half empty glass been scattered on the floor
Please don't make it last, someone may hurt to the core
I have stood strong and careful not to fall
All the same sides of the same coin.
"Privacy privacy!" In an intricate web weaved by the shadow spiders.
"We value it! Protect it! Embrace it!" Yet the illusion of even typing these words are not so very private.
I was so open,
Legs open,
Heart open,
But mind closed to the idea of
Your deception.
Of
How you
Sometimes
The most painful reckoning
Is to stare in the eyes of the sinner
And watch them smile and pretend
As if they've never burned you
And the Giant sighed, grimace and frown
as its impossible form was broken down.
Bones like steel, warped and bent,
and skin like leather, was easily rent.
No sign its might, no courage seen,
𝔜𝔬𝔲'𝔯𝔢 𝔞 𝔯𝔢𝔡 𝔞𝔭𝔭𝔩𝔢
𝔉𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔢𝔫 𝔱𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔤𝔯𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔡
𝔇𝔢𝔞𝔯 𝔶𝔬𝔲'𝔯𝔢 𝔱𝔲𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔟𝔯𝔬𝔴𝔫
𝔄𝔫𝔡 ℑ 𝔴𝔢𝔭𝔱, 𝔣𝔬𝔯 ℑ 𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔲𝔤𝔥𝔱
𝔜𝔬𝔲 𝔴𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔦𝔫 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔠𝔬𝔯𝔢
𝔅𝔲𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔞𝔯𝔢 𝔬𝔥 𝔰𝔬 𝔯𝔬𝔱𝔱𝔢𝔫
When writing this poem/song, I took inspiration from the greatest rapper of our time (in my opinion), Tupac Amaru Shakur/also known by his stage alias, “2PAC” while listening to arguably his most popular diss song called “Hit
Wearing this crown of shit. Proud and shameless. I stand. I'm Standing tall. Here I stand. You will not make me fall. I will not crumple. I will not hesitate. As you spectators speculate. In an attempt to emulate. To only perpetuate. Some it may
I know it's silly
...
i use to fall asleep
i would see your face
my eyelids would fill
with bright colors
and my nose would
breathe in your scent
and i would hold you close
I knew this really helpful gentleman.
So helpful.
So gentle.
So man.
He was always declaring how he loved to help.
So helpful.
So gentle.
So man.
I'm going to start this out like I start everything else I write you
Even though I doubt that you'd ever see this
I swear to God that I'm not mad at all
There is no hate in my heart toward you or anyone
Acting like you caught up in the game
You’re so vain
It’s a shame,
You can’t even maintain
Your rep. has been stained
You try to act deep but
You still sound shallow
Full of big talk but
You think you’re all that
You’re as real as can be
Have you changed your style
Out of screaming envy?
Have you had second thoughts
Because of someone else’s opinion?
I’d never change my mind
i take off my shirt,
turn my back to the mirror
and look at all of the scars-
taking a knife to my back
seems to be everyone’s favorite hobby,
i see you in fucking santa clarita.
fucking that bitch
that will never fucking love you
that will never treat you like me-
that will never protect you,
As the new tracks licked the freshly fallen snow
My eyes seemed to glisin brighter than ever
As if my arrows could taste the thick metallic liquid of the soon to be
WALLS silently whisper to me all the time
We Are Loyal Listening Stations for a lifetime
I betrayed myself
During my younger days,
And opened myself up to shame,
I betrayed myself
During my younger days,
Over and over again,
And there are times
That knowing what I did
When you're rushing back and forth in desperation,You will find me
When you're so in over your head at night under your blanket,
The effect of your affection is wearing out
You shouldn't have waited so long
Kept him wondering if to you he belongs
Only for the agony to prolong
The place has turned vacant, yet
I have loved everyone. I did.
My life is an infinite number of scars,
Marring the planet upon which I walk.
It’s one after another,
They never seem to end.
Some were caused by others,
Please don't cause me depression.
Am not begging you to make you feel inferior over me, or make look like a kid who lost the compass to the future.
But please listen to me while I still have a voice to say something.
It is not just one, there are many, one for each you
Wounds, Hurt
One for each absence
How much you? How much me? How much of us?
How much time and absence on this goodbye?
DISAPPOINTING when the only expectation that matter is to be loved
EMPTINESS caused for not listing
CRYING without reasonable reason
EVASION of the more simple things in live
The happiest point in my life,
Is somewhere I'm supposed to be,
Your youth shouldn't be filled with strife,
Instead it should be carefree;
But that has nothing to do with me,
But I'm blessed with a family,
yo
i'm broke
'cause i'm lovin' these hoes
give your heart just so they can shoot it down from a microscrope
backstabbin' disruptin' hoes putchu on the low
now you sittin' here all alone
My friend, you betrayed me.
What relief there is in that simple statement!
Your actions so entirely obliterated
Your pillar of my world that your betrayal
Has lost its sting and I am left without a doubt:
Can’t we find love in our selves
Without worrying what others
Think about us?
We are told that there
Is always an enemy amongst us,
But they never for once said it will be yourself.
The person
Who you
Confided in
Told your pain
Let them into
Your heart
Those people
Were the ones
We thought
Wouldn't hurt us
In the end
They all do
Goodmorning honey, so they say
distant at heart.. but close at screws
so vivid you see, you without me
things missed for things misused
selfless laws governed me
troubled, shrubbed up with worry
“I love you more than anything,” you once whispered in my ear,
while you read aloud Goodnight, Moon in my pillow forts,
and hummed quiet lullabies so I could rest.
“I love you too.”
It never works,
And I'm an idiot for trying.
I feel like you've unpopped the corks,
'Cause I'm suddenly crying.
I don't know where to start.
You’re the downside to up.
You can make a happy man frown.
You’re the bad side of good.
Where sin and worry are present, you are there.
I loved you,
Quiet in its blooming,
Branching thoughts of wisdom,
Soft petals cascade.
In lavender and gentle pinks.
Then soul crushing blues,
sweep the garden,
petals peacefully cascading no more,
waves of desire.
stormy days and his ocean eyes,
and a world of hurt
being left to decipher
what I did I did wrong,
what put me so far away
from what I wanted
even after I wrote you a song
Best friends you said
looked me deep into my eyes
straight into my soul i thought
best friends you said
over your shoulder
casually, easily
best friends you said
ONE DAY A STORM CAME
IT DESTRYOED THE ENTIRE CITY
THE CITY WHICH WAS ONCE KNOWN AS THE CITY OF LIGHTS
THE STORM BROUGHT HATE
THE STORM BROUGHT TEARS
THE STORM BROUGHT BETRAYAL
ONE DAY THE STORM LEFT
You have a beautiful smile, thats what you said.
I laughed it off as just pretend.
A month then passed and you were there,
Right beside me combing my hair.
Behind my ear in a loving way,
the rain pounded heavily last night
drops of water ran slowly down the car windows
matching the silver trails of the tears that wound down my cheeks
rough hands that weren't yours stroked my skin
New friends and beautiful Allegheny sunshine
gave the impression things would get better.
Momma and I needed to do some healing and
wemade sure to make lots of new acquaintances
so we'd have "love" and "support".
It's like a blade that never stops twisting in your heart.
When you fall in love, you fear everything about them.
Their very existence is your foundation.
You love them so madly you're blinded by it.
You said some things.
Don’t hide behind a screen
Say what you really mean
Face to face
To the person you seem
Too shy to answer
When the morg fills with these bones of mine,
please know that I was not alone.
For inside me, was mind, made 1 and 3,
the soul to which I cling from with in
is composed of the holy trinity.
The reminder of heartbreak comes, I am sad
when life is good, its good to me
and everything that was bad is only, a mystery
but when the dark clouds roll in
i start to shiver within my skin
She wasn’t trash nor the last slice of cakeon the dinner table at your friends gathering that was never touchedShe was a person shattering through the mirrorbecause all four pieces destroyed theastonishing caring girl she once wasShe’s trying and
Light outside snapped and dipped
around the old stone
and the
clipped clean manicured lawn.
i had to look up to meet your wild hurt gaze
your fury at the top of the staircase
above me
A real man will know your body is sacred
His desires are more than fruit from a tempress' garden
He will be pactient
He will not try to decieve
If he is a man
Then he will only see you
You water me with your reassurance
You made me feel beautiful
You dowzed me with sun
You forgot to water me
You left me to welt
You told me I was pretty
Yet you left me out to welt
Come in, sweet friend!
Speak to me in calm whispers as I study the kindness in your heart.
Your brown eyes fade from my memory as you slip the knife into my back.
I learn there is none.
Tears set in blood on a child's face,
A child betrayed by older men,
Dissolve with a blush of embarrassed shame,
As five long years of silence begin.
Confused hands tremble in a disoriented state,
Maybe it's the way
You hate me
That pulled my heart
Closer to you.
I am a flower
Wanting to be a tree.
It's too far
For me to reach
Like the love
You have for me.
Why even bother,
why even try
to think about someone
who only lies.
Their arms are not
worthy
but I push it
aside
because I don't
know what I will do
You know, my friend, a better friend might care a little more--
An honest friend, a selfless friend, would want to help me soar.
Dear Zhenna,
I don’t want to do this,
But what choice do I have?
Where else would I go,
If you’re the only friend I have?
No space between, at least not seen,A gleaming gild shines there.A golden scent from air is lent,The heavenly pools in pair.
She ran to the outside and stood in the highest peak,
She looked up at the Sun, who looked like he was going to weep,
His rays, tired they were
You said No one likes you because you cry so muchAnd I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me.When you claimed that My voice My intellect--Every skill and positive trait
I've witnessed your suffering
Your deep pain unparalleled
Open yourself Love's flower
only to wither and die
I've heard your secrets bemoaned
Intimate and euphoric
Here envelopes you a cave
So why'd you do it?
What made you think it was okay to blow it?
We spent so long patching up the things that didn't belong
And now it turns out that it was you all along
I spent so long trying to make things right
you think a lot
you think about the space above
the planets and stars
when you're sad and alone
oh how you wish to be a star
you bet stars don't have to deal
with what you have to deal
with
Have you ever asked me if I was okay?
Have you ever asked me how was my day?
Money is all you cared about
And you got it no matter where you stayed
You didn't care about my emotions
The sun reflected milky white off my skin outside the gym
When you asked me where my sister was
I told you that she was sick
You asked me what I meant
In one year and two months,
My memories were engraved in the dawn of time
Where love is not the only thing that moves people.
I lost the feelings between the quenchers of
Glory and Self-righteousness.
Dear First Love,
Out of all the lies you’ve told me “I love you” was my favorite….
But your “I love you”s have lost their meaning,
And my body has lost all feeling,
You say you love me,
Yeah Rright!
You wouldn' know what love was,
if it was dancing in the mirror.
Singing sweet tunes as you slept through the night.
You say you love me,
Yeah right!
You say you love me,
Yeah Rright!
You wouldn' know what love was,
if it was dancing in the mirror.
Singing sweet tunes as you slept through the night.
You say you love me,
Yeah right!
Because I Love You
I protected you from bullies since we were little.
"Crybaby" "Loser" "Whiny" "Weak"
They called you all this and more, but I stopped it
Because I Love You.
Classes separated and we drift,
Dear friend, why do you not speak to me anymore;
Overtime, you slowly closed that door;
You locked it firm, while I knocked for help;
Your words pounded me like an asteroid belt;
Is it wrong?
Is it wrong,
If my heart beats
For two loves?
Is it wrong,
That my desires
Are made whole
By two doves?
Is it wrong,
That in one my intelligence
If you only knew how special you were to me,
you wouldn't treat me like you do.
But you treat me like trash because you don't know
how much I really love you.
It's been a while now
That I've had a liking for you
Hidden in the shadows of our friendship
Slowly kindled for years
Perhaps it could be love
But who knows,
There was no intention
See thee now, who hast betrayed
The ways of old, the sacred sage
The time that flows in strands, a stream
Its silver waters under your light doth gleam
You robed in white with flowers crowned
She was a one of a kind.
With a tail for legs,
Princess Ariel never thought she'd find,
A Prince Charming who loved who she really was.
Until she did, or so she thought.
Once upon a time-
In a land far before the days of rhyme
stood one wiser than all, and that would be I.
Knowing all, naive to none, I once upon a time, was a brilliant someone.
#Day2 - August 2017
Love shot down like a thug on the street..
Heart shattered like broken glass on a beat..
Sound waves rumbling through my head like a stampede..
Miss in, your infinite jest
your classic fury
your talking seeds
Mist, the clouds of vermillion
the masquerade of bells
the chef behind red
There once was a banquet.
Many had come afar.
There were dancers, games, people doing wonders.
There was even a boy with his guitar.
The party was long
We thought you'd do your part from the very start
and provide for us like a small marketer running his cart.
But no. You couldn't handle the prod, the pinch, the feuding.
Betrayal…
as much as we fight it, it still finds a way to be near
Known to psychologist as unconscious fear, but I seem well aware of it after each tear
I wanted your help but you turned away
made it seem like attention's what I really craved
I wanted to smile, to laugh, and to play
but all you really added was a little more pain.
And there we were deteriorating.
Where were you when we were degenerating.
And here you lack some empathy.
And our corrupt hearts are worsening, regressing.
Go ahead and mourn with other people.
What’s your worst nightmare?
Is it
The way water
Engulfs you,
Imprisons you,
And slowly steals your breath?
Or,
I waited there for hours,
You said he would be here.
I can’t believe I listened,
But I won’t shed another tear.
You have hurt me for years now;
You promised me a new man.
I take a deep breathInhale deepTo keep my tearsKeep all of my unwarranted hurtunwanted angerAt bayDespite the boiling rageThat unexplicit betrayal insideI smiled on the outside
I spent so many years with an empty feeling.
With you ,
I was filled.
I was whole.
I realize,
you were always that missing part of my soul.
Now that you are gone,
The betrayal runs deep.
I remember the days we spent together,
Filled with laughter and endless adventure.
I remember all the years that passed,
Bringing us closer with each rising sun.
She witnesed the other woman's lips
effortlessly against your cheek
like they belonged there.
Your voice whispered through her chest
reminding her how trustworthy you were.
Did it hurt you when you turned and sunk your knife into my skin?
Burning,tearing, watching my thick blood run down the soft subtleties of my skinThe skin you once loved, you still do.
my heart beats with the thunderI fall away this afternoonmy betrayal permeates my mindI think of leaving soonA year has passedI've gone my way with strange freedomI feel forever and a day
The way you look into my eyes shows your hunger.
You don’t want me.
You want my body.
When I see you my brain activates fight or flight.
TEARS OF AN ADOLESCENT
She was right there
seated on the front roll
with a broken heart in her hands
dressed in her usual black lace
this time with a sad face
I could see the pain deep inside her soul
If you promise to stay,
will you really
not go?
I'm not sure I can take
much more heart break.
Am I always drawn to the liars?
The helpless,
hopeless,
and mean?
Maybe I was too innocent,
maybe i was too stupid,
maybe i was too excited,
But who could have denied that i was in love..
Love which was beyond your cruelty
Where is what he fought and died for?
“Who?” I hear you asking.
Dedan Kimathi! The man we love to forget.
The man who turns in his unmarked grave every day,
The man screaming in his grave right now at our betrayal!
The knife in our backs
The memories revived
I see it all
When he plunged it in my soul.
How cruel was he,
Listening to me complain
As the soul I was allegiant to
I am drowning in tribulations yet I laugh.
I laugh at you, I laugh at me.
I laugh at all of us whose lives are tough.
He watches us with much glee,
Seeing how he fooled us once more.
I can run
You can't hide
A fortnight ago
I swore you died.
I watched as you burned
Flesh cracked and turned
black as the night.
Not a star in sight.
I watched you melt away
All that reigned primarily in his mind was getting home fast
Getting home to his woman’s loving and waiting arms,
To the comfort of his puffy couch,
To gaze upon the towering screen,
Across the stars, a name is written,
As any fraud oracle could’ve predicted,
All have become love struck fools, completely smitten.
1. When I first saw you, I didn't set my eyes on yours but instead observed your saunter from behind as you made your way into the crowd of people. I should have known something was up with you, I mean who wears brown leather jackets anymore.
what use am I to youunless I got a secret to be toldwhat good am I to youif my body you can't hold
I live in this world where my worthis measured in my bust my facemy hips and the size of my girth
There is nothing worse than betrayal, because it signals the end of a friendship.
You claim I betrayed you, but I did no such thing.
After all, I'm not the backstabber.
I'm not the trash talker.
I'm not the cheater.
I’m there for you whenever you need me
…except for when it’s inconvenient.
You’re the most important person in my life
…until someone better shows up.
I’m sorry
…that I got caught.
You murdered me with whisperings
of trusted secrets now in fling.
Our trust you tore with rampant greed
and flaunted my foolish empathy
that marked you as my everything.
When I see you I smile
I realize how happy I am inside
To have you as a friend
You were always so kind until the end
Smiling, laughing and having fun
We always did throughout the run
It stings deep inside
Though it reveals itself
As righteous anger
Or perhaps
A blind fury
Is more accurate
Your blood roars
With the urge
To inflict pain
Only later
Help me,
with a Clarity of Feeling.
Naturally,
as much as we can,
I must feel it.
Help me,
Be at Peace with my Heart.
I love Trust love.
Naturally,
The crimson petals of the past,
remind me of the colour of your lips,
the rain of your weeping.
Never did you listen,
when the angels warned you of my curse,
all I touched went toxic,
Your light shone but once,
sprouted my rose of ardor,
the rose soon to wilt.
In plentiful bloom,
is our chemical romance,
beautiful yet beastly.
Bleeding our love:
Nightfall is honest,
For when the dawn comes,
the sun awakens,
I too.
The truth dies with rising gold,
a new lie spun for all's eyes.
You’re my best friend-
what should have been a modest prank turned into a sick plan
that left me squandering energy for your own entertainment.
You played me like a puppet
the feeling is dark
it's burning real slow
growing and festering
the origin unknown
one day I woke and suddenly so
engulfed by emotion
and left with a foe
instinct is real
Poppies asunder put me under;A slumber bathed in deep, dark umber, Oneiroi aplenty approach me there;Company where there exists no air. Poppies given to me by you;Poisonous mixture, a warlock's brew.
I've tried evading the situation
but I have bled for too long
and I can no longer be strong
My heart has called for a confrontation.
The betrayal is quite tiresome
And how my heart did feel that day
When all alliance beat upon the crush'd
All hope of victory was deftly flush'd
By blood and for low price was I betrayed
But all in secrecy was soft relayed
I hear the words whispering in my head,
"Lonely, alone, lost, forgotten."
"You don't belong."
I look at everyone around me and I ask myself,
"Why are you so far from me when I feel so close to you?"
Each flower
I picked for you
I wished and wished
For your words to be true
But even the steams
Knew you told lies
Slowly, they shrunk
Without saying their goodbyes
Each flower I picked
Tell me
was it fate
that you built me up on lies
and threw me away
it was like a game to you
I'm caught up in what I thought I knew
but I know nothing now
baby girl I see you got the finest ass too bad you ain't got no class your lack of education shows desperation you seek for fame instead of self gratification.
"Have you ever felt
Lost
Tossed
You are chained
They didn't pay the cost
You did
With your nightmares
It hurts to be forgettenI try to supress the painbut it still doesn't work,so my other best option
You made me love you
Just to hurt me in the end
You made me laugh
Just to make me cry again.
You saved me from myself
Then ended up throwing me off the cliff.
You lied and told me you loved me
Here we go again
With you all proud of yourself
And me distressed
Why, I asked softly
Why
You simply just stared and walk away as I stood there humilatered
Over the course of time
I’ve caught a couple knives in the back
From a couple friends
I thought it was kinda weird how they thought
It would feel good
I am the cutter
You are the tree.
I love you
And you love me.
I take up my axe
Step out the front door,
Adulthood snuck up on me, deceived me
Oh, she’s a sly one
She flirted with me for a time, dangling her alluring maturity and ravishing freedom before my eyes
Money talks, so do first impressions
I guess she wasn’t impressed by
my words, cheapened by my nervousness
she thought I was one dimensional
A tinted red rose grazes my cheeks when I think of the time that you licked your lips after kissing me
when I asked you why, you said you could still taste me.
It was delicately beautiful and disturbing all at the same time,
Prick.
Betrayal hurts,
oh the prick.
The taste of metal,
on a soft finger is lingering on my throat.
Each drop is it's own separate thorn.
Don't wither.
I called a thousand times last night
But you were never there
I wore my voice out crying
But I know that you don't care
What happened to the kingdom
We built from blood and ash
Why do you push me away
When all I want to do is help?
Please let me help take care of you,
Since you cannot yourself.
You used to be so kind to me,
Now you won't let me in.
I can't win.
My soul sinks deep out like a ship,
a sole shepherd without his sheep,
silence of the lamb in friendship.
Your absence's killing me softly!
This is my story of the factors that determine me,Drive me to be who I want to be,And create my own destiny.I’ve never been a size twoAnd everything I would doWould be wrong to you.
The Monster locked inside this mirror is full of deception,
Deceived by a world full of hate and conception.
No where to turn to get a gasp of air,
There are no self righteous that are godly or fair.
You ripped out my heart and threw it at my feet.
You told me I lost my mind, that’s not really fair.
You listened as it slowly thumped its last beat.
betrayal
and aching in your lungs
the last half-sip of wine
no u-turns
one
missing
stitch
bleeding ink on left hands
whys and what-ifs
alone at a table
She told you
She trusted you
She fell in love with you
But you like someone else
She knew it
She didn't want to believe it
She fell in love with you
She told you
You tell me that you love me.
Why don't you stop with these lies?
You tell me you don't want to hurt me.
If that's so, why, why?
Why would you break my heart?
Troubles, I have troubles.
Here, there just about anywhere.
You could say I have 99 troubles
And you’re all but one.
Why can’t you be loved or loving?
I know you have been hurt,
I don't understand
What do your words mean?
I'd like to think I know you better than to believe that it's what it sounds like
You've been irresponsible for some time now
He used to light her up,
Watch her dance beautifully,
On a pedestal in his eyes.
But then he left her ,hanging.
All alone in the dark,
and waited for her chains to break;
Betrayal is indeed a bitter pill to swallow
one I never thought I'd have to taste
shows my naivety
betrayal never crossed my mind
so I never thought of it in others
now I ache deep in my heart
They say, "keep your friends close
But your enemies closer."
I ask, then, how do you know?
Who is your friend
And who is your foe?
One moment it's sunshine
And happiness and laughter.
It's now very clear to see
What you've been doing to me
It's written all over your face
Your arms, your legs, your chest
I couldn't see it before because
I didn't think you were like the rest
It is malicious. It is a place you go when you find revenge, vengeance, and reprisal,
Delicious.
It is a place where you feel trapped while you’re in it;
And where the memory, when you’re out, consists of black images—
She doesnt know she poor, Even when life tells her in many ways Her refrigerator becomes empty. Whenever she is hungry she can't even find a whole meal. Her family barley has enough food to last them until they can get more.
A: School is for fool!
Let's go to the pool!
Kick the stool,
And grab the tools!
We can make our rules,
And make the girls drools.
Do you want to be cool?
No rhythm
No rhyme
Just me
And myself
Dark hands
Bright face
WIth a dim glow in the eyes
Worn out
By the challenge
Of living each day with a smile
Inside
I am not the only one
Who has served someone my heart on a silver platter
And had it left to spoil in the hot sun on their porch.
Nor am I the only one
Who has trapped someone else's words in my mouth
I'm in a world of pain
My best friend and my... ah!
I can't stand this vain
"Are you okay" Well yeah
My heart just snapped
And my friend is a dick
While I just rapped
Up my rage until I pick
Do you know that moment
Where your life seems
To be spent
On stupid stuff like dreams?
Lies and betrayal all about
The earth as it spins
Its enough to make you shout
Because you can't win
Little girl stood strong and free,
With her head held high,
And her eye in the sky,
But little girl is different from you and me.
Little girl used to run and play,
She had friends by her side,
No secrets would she hide,
But soon little girl began...
All my life
I have been unwrapped
My ribs glossy-exposed
My lips made of glass
They have told me to learn
And I have taught myself to listen
While ignoring what is important
Behind the hazel, she's just a lonely little one. Behind the hazel, she wants to the world to be gone. Behind the hazel, she's fighting everyday. Behind the hazel, she's scared in every way. Behind the hazel, she's slightly shattered.
“Free me”, she screams in his face.“No more.No more a moore.I am a river.I flow.I live and give
I hate these ballet shoes
Everyday marks another bruise
And as I dance with the pain, my brain is in flames, going insane
Working double time over what should be considered a war-crime
Hope flies high above, unshackled and free
As any bird could ever dream. Shadows
Dare not touch it and fear, ugly beast, cows
Before its light. Watch, at dawn you will see.
I walk through a dark alley,
In this Texas Valley.
Its dark stormy night,
I walk still and fight for my right
To let go of my memories.
I now stare forward and I see it ; the evil liar.
Behind the curtain
What I keep hidden
From your eyes and mind
Is strictly forbidden
Under the mask
What a clever disguise
You were my partner…. you were my brother…You understood this side of me the way no one else could.We’d vent to each other, we struggled together every single day just to be seen as normal…
I am trying so hard not to say soft thingsbecause I am strongand distantand do not have tender feelings.Because you hurt me and I,I am far too powerful for that.
You told me forever,
But now you are holding her hand.
You held my like I was your world,
But now all alone I stand.
You kissed my like you were scared to lose me,
But now you laugh with out me.
Look here forward
Future told
Scrolls are written
Don't unfold
Don't hold near
or close to thee
Taking lives
and take a knee
Hands stained pale
Soul lost in lies
Everyone is always trying to rush to the end
just to feel good about the win.
But what awaits for you as you stand in the line of people who want the same things as you?
I'm not the type to hold grudges
But I do have something to say
There's just too many things unsaid
That I must get out of the way
I remember when I met you
You were innocent and kind
I cannot begin to imagine
What comes within this baggage
Friendship! What a slippy, messy slope?!!
A non-romantic relationship
Where two hearts begin to elope
You tell me you love me
That I'm your only true love
But how you going to tell me that
When we can't even go out
without you trying to hide
Your always so paranoid
I'm a coward
with ice cold feet
i was too strong to tell you
that you make me weak
i was too cocky
to tell you that I was afraid
And I was too used to replying to "how are you"
with I'm okay
When I was five years old,
I believed the fairytales;
Prince Charming would come save me,
and love could never fail.
I thought that every bad guy
would be easy to see.
When we first met, you were just the next in line. I already had someone; someone better. Someone who got there first.
And I could never call you Dad.
You’re not my friend
You’re a frenemy
You used my shoes
My towels
My clothes
My Dial
I thought you were true
You only hang around cause
My heart aches and breaks
as you walk away
Reaching out my hand
in hopes that you'll hold it once more
Listen as I grow old the Gov's mask slips and expose a past.
I learned so many things that concerns me.
In all honesty this world is breaking apart.
My poetry is picking up the debris.
Your misery to me is totally attractive.
I love the way your tears taste, or at least i would if ever sampled,
Your sadness entices me, makes me feel like I’m not alone
I was born and you were four you looked to me as an enemy Never saw the blood we shared since we came from two of the same
Forget Me Not
*controversial*
Morning sickness brings the blues,
Monthly cycle is overdue.
She was drunk that night,
Flinging morals in the wind,
Stitch-1 she should have thought before she did!
Stitch-10 she should have thought before she said what she did!
Stitch-20 she should have thought before she turned them all!
I came to my father and said, "Father, I have straight A's."
Ignoring me as he turned to my brother.
"Son, don't ditch school or get F's. You're the one that carries the family's name."
People say
Being at the bottom
Means there’s only one way to go-
Up.
But does it ever feel to you
That when you hit bottom,
You see the top,
You see where you want to be,
Sweet, musky scentthat rises the stripedstairs into my nostrilsand opens my eyesto see a blurred, blue silkysmooth crashing, clutchfrom the shoving mobbehind me, intoa forgotten memory, whose
I wish that I could sleep, I wish I couldn’t see,
All the things that we could be.
I wish that I could breathe, I wish that it was we,
But it’s you plus her, not me.
You never hit
Wetness like stripes fall
Drip into regret
You never yelled at me,
Gasping air, the thud of the wall.
Memories are set.
You never lied to me
I am a shirt
torn and worn out
like taking a pile of gold
and throwing it on the ground.
What's the use of reaching down
don't give yourslf a hard time
it will fall-your crown
Because it is vulnerable, an option, you might see.
Wide out in the open, entire visibility.
Kindness, is it only but a word?
A person who hears people's needs.
But oddly, sadly, is never ever heard.
You try your best to see the light.
In a blinding sheet of darkness.
You ignore and try to forget.
You walked away from life,
from friends, family.
For why?
For a love that never came true,
for a love that was broken hearted.
Can you say it was worth it?
Don't imprison me with your determined boundaries of fear and unhappiness
My love is real, unwavering
Don't hold me so close, so tight I can't breathe
My breathe is for you, unheedingly
What I Hate
Do you know what I absolutely hate?
What makes me so sick to my stomach?
And my skin crawl with repulsion?
I’ll tell you what I hate:
I down another bottle
To wash the pain away.
For a brief moment,
I feel a bit okay.
No Mama.
Nothing is wrong,
I was running, I fell,
I shouldn't have been running.
He told me not to run.
My innocence? It's gone.
He took it from me,
A beautiful rose;
Bred in forest,
Found in budding
A blooming rose;
The mountain smiled down,
Cradled the petals with love
A withering rose;
Doused with poison,
My eyes go red filling with anger
How can this be?
A person I gave my whole heart to betrays me so suddenly
He made my life green, giving me hope
Im at a loss for words right now
I don't know what to say
I don't know how to feel or how
to go about my day
The images never leave my head
Your happiness displayed
After you crossed that line,
I told you to get the hell out of my life.
I didn’t want anything to do with you.
I don’t care if we’ve been best friends since 8th grade.
Once that line is crossed
you take the blade
because it’ll fill the whole
you force a smile
to ease their soul
you shed a tear
where none can see
you swallow your pride
save them endless misery
I didn't notice how naked I was
until all our movement stopped and we just laid there
and I heard this was the best part,
I knew this was the best part,
I gave you my heart,and you gave me yours,piece by piece until i had it allbut I didn't realiseyou weren't giving me your heartyou were giving me minepiece by piece
I saw the way you looked at me, with need in your eyes
Desperate for me to come towards you, and to feel your flesh against mine
Every day that's what I've done, and what I had plan to do
Chance and chance again,
I call upon a question where I knew a friend,
Before the trials and tribulations began,
We had no end,
You were there through thick and thin,
High and low,
"I don't hurt people"
is such an
ignorant
statement.
Maybe you don't set fire to houses,
or burn down forests,
But that doesn't mean you've never ignited me with jealousy,
Staring out at the rain
My heart shattered inside
It’s the end of the world
Where I felt alive
My heart is on empty
Hopeless, alone
Lost in a world that had seemed like my own
A letter to my mother
My mother hates me and I don’t know why
We just can’t seem to see eye to eye
She disrespects me to the ump degree
Now I’m going to tell you what’s in my decree
You Lied
You Lead Me on
Man I thought I could trust you
Tought there was a reason you asked if I liked you
If I wanted to meet up
I thought maybe just maybe you to
Then you put me on the spot
Emile was a shepherdess,
Every morning she would go outside,
Skip merrily across the fields,
And into the pen
That held her beloved sheep.
Pinks, Purples, blues, greens,Strike with a Spark of Powder,With each curve,twirling,They leave a dusty trail.Only to be left,A mess.
Tried my best to please the beast, but alls forgotten wen you take a seat,faith is replaced with unspe
I can hear you scream my name
from the shoreline of my watery grave
but I can't answer your call
because I'm drowning in the darkness
and I can't see your hand
but even if I could
I want you to trust me.
I want the smiles,
The laughter,
And the love back…
I don’t want these tears…
I don’t want these fears…
I want you
To believe in us,
To believe in me…
I wonder,
If you ever think of me.
Of all the nights
We spent side by side,
My head on your chest,
Arms intertwined,
As our hands engulfed each other’s.
I wonder
The Sun shines in my eyes,
Its warmth on my face,
A smile on my heart,
I am filled with grace.
The Sun smiles back,
A very wide grin,
Speaks soft gentle words,
Inviting me in.
I am sensitive,
More delicate than
a Bleeding Heart.
Ice cold criticism
is my demise.
I resort to
witty remarks before
lashing out as
my last defense.
Our boat is sinking, and I hold tightly to it.
I tell you it will be alright. I tell you it may stay afloat.
Our boat is sinking, and I slide to the end.
I see the bruises on your arm
I see the townsfolk has caused you harm
I see those chains bound to your ankles and wrists
This windowless dungeon I wonder who could think of this?
When I first met you
I was determined to be your friend
Everyday I'd come over
Just to see you again.
I'd do the sneakiest shit
To see if you would smile
It's the most fun I've had
Bound to her lone tower
Her White Knight won't let her go.
Chaining her with his love
He's blind to what's inside her soul.
But in the midst of her routines
She's drawn to this Dark Knight.
Time keeps passing, the world still turns
I’d hoped I’d moved on, but the passion still burns
I know you still feel it, there’s no way you don’t
Follow me
Through this dance of conformity
Copy my movements
Add them to your list of improvements
Your sickness cannot frighten me away
Acceptance is child’s play
I’ll give you the antidote
I know you're sick of me, redundant,stupid, childish me. I know you don't believe me,and kicking out my mother and sisteris a-okay with you,but that's not how familyworks. You don't "mesh" with my demonsbecause you think there's nothing there,wh
The sweets
You gave to me
Became a metaphor of you:
So decadent with just one bite
I devoured them whole,
But now all I taste
Is your poison.
I am taking off my diamonds,
The emerald mask you gave me to wear
To hide the hurt you left behind,
The hole you left behind.
I am letting all my old scars show.
The sun has a waking effect
On those left for dead
Decidedly a lost cause
Because they more easily bled
These band aids can only cover surface wounds
And as the sun reaches down
Sick and tired of playing the victim;I have shown myself to be unconquerable.Though my pace has been slowed, I'll never give in,I am unstoppable.Because through all the pain,the heartache, and the tears,
People stand behind me
Supporting me
Cheering me on
They're my closest friends
In front of me
Are my enemies
I know they hate me
Their faces filled with disgust
The day is waiting here it comes.
Don't feed me the lies you love so much.
Just leave me to run with my fears.
The tears are coming,
False friends dying,
You never feel strong enough
A word that many kids seem to take advantage of
Who really knows the meaning of love?
Teens are too naive to realize the main truth
Guys don’t understand the meaning, we aren’t sleuths
Happy and joyful. Trusting and Loving.
Reaching out for love she wasn't shown at home.
Accepted and loved. Appreciated and wanted.
There comes a time in life when -
you realize that you cant trust anybody.
At first you felt loved -
and then you were betrayed.
Your life spins
and everything you thought you knew -
is now a lie.
Well, congratulations
You've made it into society
Here we rape each other
And curse our elders
There are no rules
It's a free-for-all
Welcome to reality
You've made it into Hell
When I made you smile, I felt something.
Like fire.
When you spoke those words, my cheeks burned.
Like fire.
When you took my hand nervously, it kindled me.
Like fire.
Worn eyes look through their own reflection.
With gel she tames wild red curls.
Nora steadily powders each feature,
Desperately masking true beauty.
We don’t recognize this woman in
The glass
A trip at the end of June.
One of those yellow summers muttered with new tales and new hormones -
Of gold and silver highlights -
Of diamonds and tampered addictions.
A flight quick as liftoff.
Bitches will be bitches. But what is a friend?
A Friend is someone you trust, would do anything for
A Friend is someone who you care about
What you said was a lie.
Me, loving you,
endlessly loving you,
For what?
What have I gained from you?
Betrayal, hurt confusion...
And so I ask
Why?
I always thought
You were my diamond
In a pile of coals.
But just a wolf
hiding in sheep skin;
you devoured my heart
there it sits -
Pulsing red and bleeding
out your lies.
Many men make appearencesBut to the naked eyeAll have the same voicesCould just one man be a lie?
When you're nearHe never callsWhen he callsYou're never near.
Locked in the Prison Cell
Created for you
I look out and see
You smiling.
Laughing.
I hide in a corner,
Threadbare Blanket
Over my shoulders,
Forgotten by the ones
I call friends.
I, who was born from the particles of life, like you.
A breath into form which
I walk and I sing and I rejoice with you.
All in pleasure soft flesh contained,
But how hasted with quick flash
All my life I've been waiting
For someone to come along.
All my life I've wanted
For someone to prove me wrong.
Someone to love me forever,
Someone to dry my tears.
Someone to call my own,
They said that I'd be fine
And I believed it to be true
Until at the next moment
My eyes fell upon you
My heart began to beat off rhythm
As my vision became blind
Now I am gone
My last curtain has been drawn.
Remember when you first showed up?
And were looking at my cup?
I remember.
Remember when we went to school,
when I look at you all I see are your light brown eyes and that boyish smilethat always drove me wildand all I see when I look at you is love love love and how you just give it away to me
I lie awake.
The whirring fan-
A broken heart
Caused by my own hand.
Awake.
A train horn sighs.
A numb brain.
I hate the blackened sky.
The man in the moon laughs
A darkened heart meets one still white.
Pious pride leaves you overcome,
With the sense of feeling
Not price of deed.
Each piece is revenge tasting bittersweet
Like chocolate
I'm on my ownYou never loved meNow I pay the consequencesAnd you just walk away
I messed upI fell for youI never had a chance
Tried my best to please the beast, but alls forgotten wen you take a seatfaith is replaced with unspeakable hate and rage that could make the earth shakeonly thing that was stuck in my mind was diffrent ways that I could make them all realizeI swa
My mother likes attention
and she’ll do anything to get it.
My mother likes Xanax;
I've seen her pop it dozens of times.
My mother likes child abusers
because all of her boyfriends fit the definition.
Why me?
After everything I have put into this,
After all I have given up
I still am in constant pain.
Pain that no one can ever understand.
Pain that only the lonely can ever feel.
Why me?
Once upon a time there was love// The clouds would part right for the stars// The sun would set for the moon above// And we made the sky ours// The creatures would creep in a moonlight serenade// Creating the mood for romance// Until he cut my he
I laid in bed,
I could not write.
I lost my soul,
and lost my mind.
Now I am so frustrated,
I simply just can not take it.
Tears streamed down my face every night,
I held on to you so tight.
Leaves of green are rustling in the wind
But I sit inside and must rescind
Everything I felt for you
Was it necessary to betray me
I see now that I never will be
The one who has your love
What exactly did I do
in a former life
For you to beat me black and blue
and cause me so much strife
Did I kill or harm or steal
could I have betrayed a friend
Now all I see and all I feel
Sink holes
are grabbing them
fires
are ravaging them
time
is unwinding them
society
is bowdlerizing them
all that I know
all that I love
has seemed to decide
treachery of deepest part
reaching from the pagan heart
dagger, sheathed no more
words with venom spread
brought forth in discontent
malice seems to breed
malcontents and infamy
Dear You,
Since you all I’ve been able to hear are shots,
For each glass that I’ve learned was a plot.
Caught up in a YOLO generation,
And dehumanized by your melanin fixation.
Lost
I once lost my cat, she died
She meant the world to me
But I was OK to see her go
Because I knew she’d been set free
Life is what you make of things
They say you take the good with the bad
They say that life is full of wonders
That there is something waiting for you at the end of the long road
He was intoxicating
Fond of abandoning
He left a sad little girl all alone
Years go by
He returns, but finds her grown
She saw past his alibi
He had stolen her life
All of her time
And just like that I became the snake to your apple.
However, you can’t deny the inherent curiosity you had swimming in you.
Not a tadpole, but a Kraken inside your blackened multitudinous seas.
Knees in three inches of proximity yet you're still not close to me
We speak but it's as if I can't hear your words
Because the emotion is drained out of them and suppressed under that organ in your chest
I am NOT your Toy.
My body is NOT
ball jointed plastic limbs
bendable for your covetous cock play
I always remember the days when I kissed you and all the times we hung out because those are the memories I don't want to forget. Today I was walking through school and I saw you with him. So in love even though he doesn't love you the way I do.
Love Poem: We males today in society should be treating our girls like diamond rubies crystals and pearls.Today females that have a relationship live in sorrow,fear and despair.All females want is something very rare, like a man that can express t
The stab of betrayal is sharper than any knife.
It cuts through the heart and the brain and makes the weak question their life.
It comes from those most beloved, and is by far the worst offense.
Why do you?
Like me, I mean.
You are the second,
who told me
"I love you."
But you are the first,
whom I actually believe.
As the days go on and the nights go by
I can’t think of anything else to do,
So I sit here and cry.
Liebe mich
hasst mich
seine fur alle das gleiche mir
denn du hast mich kaputt mich
doch hab es nicht bereut
Ich will nicht bereut.
negativ Erfahrungen,
machen uns stärker
Translates to:
Wishing away my life to die,
Your one of a kind, I shall not lie.
My heart is heavy from love and lust,
Worth it or not, to die is a must.
To gaze at your face was such a gift,
Married the one, caused only rift.
Oh my love, why have you gone away?
Gone away to another like me,
Off to Jasper Lane to see Katie Rose,
To hold her like you used to me,
To kiss her under the bright moonlight, but
Oh my love why can't you see,
last spring you told me
'it will all get better'
i watched you take his hand
and walk far away.
it is not better.
it's not even close.
why did you lie to me?
One girl stands out from the rest.
One girl is different
From the others.
One girl wears her
Heart on her sleeve.
No one knows how I feel
No one knows what I want
They laugh and laugh
As if they don't care
I open the door and I see her standing there.
I look into her eyes, and it makes me want to cry.
Seeing her standing there, staring with her vicious glare.
I can’t believe I used to say that girl with her vicious glare
The word LOVE flys freely as a bird.
The word LOVE isn't given the respect it deserves.
Why shall we find it okay to remain confused, between LOVE and Lust, LOVE and Fascination.
A chance on success
A chance on failure
A chance on life
A chance on friendship
Take me or leave me
Love me or Hate me
Don't try to make me feel less if
I don't fit inside of your "box"
My Achilles heel, instead in my heart,
pierced and bled, it's by whom, that gives the start.
If failure had a word,
I guess it would be me,
You crushed me,
Destroyed my confidence,
When you didn't even give me a chance.
What do you know about hardship?
About art?
Can’t you see,
I’m trying to be optimistic.
Everything you did,
I try my hardest to forget it.
Don’t wanna hurt you
By acting like I’m so resented.
But we’ve done it before,
once lost, it disappears,
it vanishes.
it disintegrates into nothing,
it's absence leaving a void
that can never be replaced.
Can't help to not to cease to forget you
Can't help to not to try to let go
Deep Inside,
full of feelings oh so very low
Betrayal, selfishness, and fear
once part of my past
Situations you never deserved
I truly thought I knew you well, my friend,
But wrong was I of your real intentions.
Everything was always lies in the end,
And not welcoming guilt or correction.
A long time had
Now a long time gone
Makes one so sad
But I must carry on
A once was then
Is a never was now
In the arms of a friend
Do I mourn a lost vow
Death to my right hand
He has betrayed me
He lied, stole
And crushed my soul
Hmm that was smart
No one messes with me
I'd kill you myself
If I knew where to go
You can't run forever
best friends turn into worst enemies
people who you thought were cool
ends up being a fool
smile in your face
throw dirt behind your back
often people wear masks
BFFL’s For Life?
I had to find new friends,
Coming to a new place.
The ones that would truly love me,
And never leave me,
This became my new race.
Everyday I used to see you smile,
When I would see it, it would warm my heart.
But now I only feel the remaining cracks of my heart stabbing my chest.
I would trust you.
Trust you to no end..
Doubt, doubt, whine and pout
Sore, sore, because you know nothing anymore
You must be cool and composed
You must- even when all are opposed
You must deny your morals and speak tact
You must unite your comrades, you have a pact
The truth lies the best.
For example,
Your textbook says he died
as a challenger of the lady giant,
welcomed to the American Coliseum,
but sir, that is not quite the case.
He died
Covered in blue hair dye,
my ribcage tightened
like a retainer splayed across the roof of my mouth.
