I Wonder

I wonder,

If you ever think of me.

Of all the nights

We spent side by side,

My head on your chest,

Arms intertwined,

As our hands engulfed  each other’s.

I wonder

If you remember all the laughs,

And silly times we shared.

The trips,

And fun.

The jokes,

And the smiles.

If you think of the fights.

If you think of the way our kiss

Would send shivers up our spines,

And electricity between our fingers.

I wonder,

If you think about the nights

I’ll spend crying.

Calling out, for you to come home.

If you know

That I’ll always wait:

Chest aching,

Lungs barely breathing,

Hands shaking,

Eyes tearing.

If you know that

I’d change everything about me,

If it meant keeping you.

If you realized,

I know,

It’s not just about you.

That I know,

It’s about me too.

That I know

You’re trying to let me off easy,

Before you leave.

I wonder,

If you think

About all the memories we share.

About all the promises we made.

Like,

You were never going to abandon me.

You’d never walk away.

I wonder if you know,

That I’m kicking myself for that.

For finally letting my walls down,

And letting someone in.

Only to be lead down the same path,

That I was promised,

I’d never have to walk

Again.

 

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