disability
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I have given up.
I know that's what they want,
The bureaucrats who giggle with glee
As they set the hoops ablaze,
Lining them up in a maze,
Each hoop higher than the last
And further--
Beady black eyes stare at the egg
Dark-feathered wings ruffle in anticipation
The tree is silent
And the nest is cold.
But the crow will wait.
There I was
Sitting alone,
With my hands
Caressing the strings
The wind carried my noise far
Down to the corner
The people turned
And they heard
The sweet, soft crying
The earliest memory someone has should not be
the burning scent of hospital antiseptic
mixed with oxygen coming through nasal cannulas.
Should not be of crying out in pain
Crutches.
Two of them.
One strapped to each arm.
That’s the first thing they see,
But do they see me?
Stares.
I wasn’t always this lost, my days consumed by chaos
An era where everything makes me nervous
And every other day my mood drops, and rises
It’s always a fight to find my way through this mind fog
Oh, my sweet mother,
Hope you are alright,
Could not imagine life,
Without you in my sight
Oh, my sweet mother,
Please hope you care,
Life will be stressful,
Yet, it will be fair
A sea of people, eyes wide and ears open
listening intently to the compassion of my voice and conviction of my words
which has now sent me on a brand new journey
Dear Mom,
I'm sorry it has to be like this.
I wish you were able to get a good night's sleep instead of dozing on a lumpy hospital chair all night,
And having to go to work the next day.
To the people who don’t understand why I won’t let them touch me,
I’ve built a wall between friends, family, and others.
And fucking think again if you thought I had any lovers.
I was 3 when my life was flipped upside downI never got to sleepover at a friends house or Ride a bike or been ask to danceNever got to chase my brother or play like a normal kid
It has almost been six years since we last talked.
Time sure does fly, I still remember the day mine and your life changed forever
As if it happened yesterday
You lost your ability to move.
Definitions
Yesterday I got out of bed
Changed out of my pajamas and into fresh clothes
Splashed water on my face and cleaned my teeth
I laced up my own shoes, i crawled into the bathroom
People are curious by nature When I tic in public I get an ocean of judgmental eyes pointed at me A few people even come up and ask questions Feeding their curiosity Why do you curse? Why does everyone with Tourette's curse? Have you tried
I walk into the doctor’s office.
She looks at me.
I see her thinking,
Okay, no worries
Look at this girl
Thin
Tall
Young
No drinking
theres buety in silence and peace in the times without motion
but what happens when you find that those moments are gone
the days grow longer, minutes fade to hours, and hours turn into months wasted
White pillows, beeping, a rush of fluids in my arm. Oblivion.
It is the dawning of a new year, but I am stranded
In this room, awaiting the sentence, the doom, the judgment.
They put me down and replaced me.
Looking at me,
People assume I'm a healthy, happy girl.
Invisible illnesses are forgotten when disability is brought up.
This poem isn't about my genetic disorder,
or the surgeries,
They speak in broken English and they lie with silver tongues,
They swallow down old whiskey and they smoke away their lungs.
They cursed me for my difference, they hated words I sung.
weary is just not the word
I am inside another Friday night
and trudging through an anger at myself that only I can understand
all of these weeks, making myself sicker because of my own stupidity
To speak of irony I've always been good with wordsForming art out of syllables And pulling love out of vowelsBut I can never say the magic My head says, beautiful, spectacular, undeniable
You don't look sick. You are just lazy. You are using your illness as an excuse to not live life...
Disabled: Adjective
Having a physical or mental disability: Unable to preform one or more natural function. (Such as walking or speaking because of an illness or injury etc.
It first arrived in my life the day I was born
It wasn't there for me, God's breath still fresh on my skin
It was there for my parents, eyes clear, paw raised in reassurance as if to say “know this child will be able.”
I am the one with the disability
and yet you are the one who really cannot see
The world is larger than you and I
Can you not see why minds must diversify?
Can you hear the sound of the world calling your name?
Can you hear your heart talking to your brain to make sure you are awake?
Can you hear your name being called repeatedly by those around you?
Cause I can't
Makeup is itchy
So I don’t wear it.
Purses are heavy
So I carry stuff in my pockets.
If it can’t fit in my pockets
Then I don’t really need it.
But what I really don’t need
Little brother,once you asked me,why often you could not quell the urgeto leap, quiver, shake,crash upon the earth and rise again,body shaking to the beatof an unheard, forgotten hymn.
There is so much to say in the world,
Ways to express yourself or someone else or something else,
But I can't.
I can think it, it's all in my head
I just can't speak it,
Say the words.
I can't.
It looks like he has his own world.
I like to think he dances with the things he must see.
He bounces constantly, he’s like a small bird
Stuck on the ground.
He draws through the air and tells us stories.
Sped
retard
slow
those are just a few names they are called
they
are not different
because of a disability give to them at birth
they are humans.
I have a dream that one day race, socio-economic status, gender, religion, ability, or sexual orientation will no longer serve as obstacles to justic
Imagine a world of no conflictNo anger, no murder, no war
A world of respect
Where the color of your skin doesn’t matterWhere which side of the tracks you grew upon makes no change
Do you see the tears that pour down their faces?
Watching their loved ones die
Its no way to live, why not cry?
We see it in their eyes: the weakness, the terror.
To borderline death is no way to survive.
They laugh and play
and run around and say "That's retarded,"
overheard by the mother at the grocery store who wanted nothing more
than the best for her son who was born with his disability.
Ableism,
She is innocent and sweet
A joy to everyone we meet
Wish I could see the world though her eyes
When we sing and when play
She brightens up my darkest days
I try to see the world through her eyes
Big hand is Minutes and Short hand is Hours
Both take my time and waste it as I try,
Try as hard as I can to read a clock, It's easy.
Counting by fives, It's one of the rare things I can
Puzzle pieces fit in many different ways
Some go this way, some go that way
This world is one big puzzle, beautiful, and incomplete;
Your edges are frayed
And your corners are bent
My lungs don't work well, but my brain does,
And with my brain I dream and dream!
In these dreams I can see my future.
However, my brain does not sing.
I sang for you - or was it for a grade?
The boy with colored eyes
The boy with pale skin
The boy with a cute smile
The boy who makes me grin
The boy who's really tall
The boy who loves to run
The boy who never stops going
The Household should not have a head
after all I am not only an arm
I am an intellectual human being
that's what all my influences say
My parents say I'm just a girl
my brain is not yet done cooking
On a cold Monday night of 95, came into the world a 7-pound baby with blue eyes, pee-wee hands and feet.
Joy and happiness spread across the audience’s faces.
Ma and Pa were excited to have their first precious new-born home.
The smiles he gives
Are the greatest things to see
In his heart
I know theres a place for me.
Tallness takes over
With big feet at the bottom
He's a white tan
Like cool fall leaves in Autumn.
Don’t call him weird
You’ll crush him
Don’t call him “special”
He’ll be suspicious
Don’t baby him
Dumb it down, make it easier
He can see right through you
Even if he won’t say so
“I can’t, I have work after school”
“Oh, where do you work?”
“Remember I told you? I help that little boy with Autism”
“Oh yeah. Man, that’s going to look so good on college applications”
16 Years side by side separated by a wall.
You're my brother, my parents greatest illusion.
Since you were born we saw your first steps, we heard your first cry.
You had such joy and we saw you with such admire.
i
scrubbed violently at the grime on my skin
filth dirt stain soot
struggled to cleanse the grease out of my hair
dirty oily unwashed
Dreams of days that have not been,
Maybe someday, known not when.
If the future, dreams foretell,
To the present, fare thee well.
For days in progress, fondness lacks,
Closing doors behind our backs.
There is a special one out there and he's not like the rest;
He enjoys running around non-stop as fast as he can
He will even run into walls
not because he doesn't understand,
but just so he can feel the sensation
Being born in a black box
The room’s dark and cold
There’s a world outside
You know of a better world
But it’s beyond your reach
You can see it, everyone else
One day, there’s a door
People look down,
Because their words aren't right.
People look down,
Because they feel bad.
People look down,
Because they simply need to stare.
People look down,
I wonder what it must be like to sit atop the handlebars of your best friend’s bike.
I wonder what it’s like to drive a car, and to stand, looking at the stars.
I wonder how it feels to swim in a pool,
Fat
Ugly
Gay
Retard
Words heard
Words felt
Things the mirror reflects back,
aren't always the truth.
Dana never could remember what was proper to say
His only concern ever was to make someone's day.
So when Dana saw a girl, as lonely as could be,
He walked up to that girl, and that girl was me.
