skinny
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Today I am wearing anything but black solely to hide the fact that I am just sticks…
Just sticks set up in such a way that if you even tap my shoulder… you will be impaled without intention
Our faces bounced off of every wall, as well
as the bodies of many with faces of despise,
Some of theirs would shrink and some of theirs would swell
just words written down
nothing more nothing less
until they were words about
bodies
respect
food
fuel
no longer words
but a path to recovery
Hi, I'm skinny
I am five feet seven inches and weigh one hundred and five pounds
Yes, I have a flat stomach
Yes, You can see my collar bones
Yes, I have a thigh gap
And no, that does not make me beautiful
I wanted to be skinny
to fix all that I saw
to bring myself some dignity
and try to get through it all.
I made myself a plan.
I was ready to follow through.
But now I'll be stuck all fat and alone
In my youth it was hidden
the color of my hands
the sun on my blonde hair
the glisten of my green eyes
and the accompanying announcment to society
of an all american girl
who had everything she wanted
Oh society how dare you Promoting skinny as beautifulAnd fat is insecureBut at the same timeFat should love their curves And skinny should eat a hamburger You create these controversiesThat being single sucksAnd to strive for relationships But who
Narcissism. Bullshit. Love is beautiful. Love is strong and love is proud.
Why in the Now are we told we are nothing without love
but
not
allowed
to
love
ourself?
I’m short.
Really?
Are you SERIOUS?
I NEVER noticed!
Thank you for informing me.
I was hoping 5’ 3” would be tall enough
to reach the cupboard
Without standing on my toes
Some people judge you
Most people want to be you
What do I want?
Acceptance
I can’t change who I am
This is the only life I have
I will always be
Too skinny
you love to call me thick
that must be a slick way to tell me to lose weight .
You tell me to put salad on my plate .
I heard you World , to be honest .
This pound cake is too good and it already on my plate .
I look in the mirror
You know what I see?
Such an unhappy girl
Staring back at me.
She sits and she stares
Waiting for something to change
Too much darkness to bare
That nests in her brain.
5'8
107 Pounds
23" waist
Yes I'm SKINNY
Does my outer appearance bother you?
I'm happy with my body rather you like it or not.
All you are worried about is TITS and ASS.
With an empty stomach I go to bed. There is no food for me tonight.
With an empty stomach I wake up. The result of the night before is taking its effect.
clickclickclickclick
goes the key board as i sip my morning tea.
Spiling, gushing ,spewng my deepest trauma and heatache.
My therapy, your guilty pleasure.
The best job, if you ask me, is that of a writer.
I'm back, but I'm falling apart
I'm back, but I'm lacking the heart,
That I need to keep movingAnd what do I think I'm proving? Starving for attentionReceiving it in the form of tension,
I once was
A girl caged in lonliness; living nightmare
The devil on my back
Crawled in my head
i look down
my toes are wiggling nurvously, as the blinking number between my feet
is not where i want it to be.
i close my eyes.
tight.
tighter.
Being skinny my whole life, I’ve gotten a lot of:
“How lucky are you.
You never gain any weight,
You can eat anything you want.
You’re so lucky,
I wish I was you”
I am so lucky.
she looks at herself in a mirror
she looks at her face
at first glance
she is relieved
she feels okay that this is who she is
and in okay with the fact that she cant change that
Inside, they consume me
the words of society
filled with rejection
My heart aches and throbs
as I'm wrapped in the image
of pure pefection
Yet I can not grasp
Digging deep down inside,
There's no place to ride,
I feel a since of emptiness,
that sometimes I can not hide,
Who cares about my up bringing,
I surley am not suprised,
Count the calories, count the pounds,
the less you have the smaller you are.
Collarbones, tiny waist,
beauty is deeper than just your flesh.
Struggling with yourself,
fighting the demons in your mind.
The bones they scream in volumes that grow
I hear them begging to show
They want to press pass the barriers
They want me to learn “no”
It scares me as much as it thrills me
To take it all in and see
Growing up, I was toldthat all of me was wrong.A waist too big, breasts too small.Much too tall and far too wide.My parents encourageda hatred of my body.Told what not to eat.
Dark hair
Frames her angular face
Protruding cheekbones
Paperwhite skin hiding lacy blue veins
Dark eyes
Follow me around the room
Judging me
Looking at me
Wanting to be me
I'm here to tell you who I really am
I may not be athletic, tall or skinny
but I know I was created in God's image
he made me differnt for a purpose,
so I know he's not finish.
the mirror reflects
my image
i see all flaws
no light
am i really like this
is this what
others see?
A pasted on smile, stretched over bleached white teeth
Perfect skin, clean and bright
Perfect body, toned, tanned, and fit
Perfect hair, straighted and dyed
THESE are robot girls, ripped from glossy pages.
Who am I to think I’m beautiful?Disproportionate at every angle, my figure is shaped like that of a pear’s.And any claims to beauty seem to be rare,because I can hardly stand the sight of my body bare.
when you look at me what you see
darskin ,brown eyes and sandy brown hair\
do see a big smile, with dark lips
someone thats not that tall
but stand so tall and proud
all the time
We wish upon a shooting star, just to change who we are
Gaze among the stars so bright, just so we can see the light
I don’t know much about the world, economy, politics and what not
I didn’t know about slavery or racism at all for that matter
I didn’t know about Martin Luther King’s dream and how the conquest for Civil Rights
Mirrors and mind contort what I see,
Skinny and thin is what I must be;
86 pounds just isn’t enough,
Starving myself is going to be tough.
I force down another bite
Pack on another pound
My friends push me to the edge
“You’re pretty, but much to skinny.”
So I eat and eat and eat
Not because I’m hungry
But ashamed of what I’ve become
My journey starts here
But , where do I go?
High hopes here and there
But , where do I go?
This test is like a show
But , where do I go?
Options weighing high and low
But , where do I go?
The thing about ED is
He never leaves you
Through the good
The bad
The ugly
He's there
A little wasp
Following you around
Stinging you
Every time you reach out
