Void
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How does one fill a void inside?
Who is there in which I can confide?
I'd like to say I need to swallow my pride,
But there's none left, so now I'll just hide.
I wrote you a letter two years ago that I never gave you.
In the letter I said that I loved you.
I wish I could tell you that!
I wrote and I wrote and I wrote, until my arm felt like elsatic.
They expect me to stand here in silence to find worth in how they deprived me of who I truly was .
I hark back prior to my birth. My words couldn't possibly illustrate this event because man's intelligence communication, moreover words didn't exist.
As my head lays motionless on top of a soaked pillow
While my empty music fills the void of the room at midnight
Blank eyes illumanted by wrung out lyrics
I know you'll never be there
right in my hour of need
I'm afraid to feel nothing
I am happy to feel tired
If that is the one thing I am
Then I am tired
Say it as my first name
As my title
I embrace the fatigue
I do not want to be empty
Is there a point to all this?
Some sense of release hidden behind years of
Doubtful ventures into nothing.
Can I outstretch these fastened wings,
And search for some greater feeling,
Have you ever looked up at the sky during a cold winter night, wondering if there’s somewhere nothing exists?
Where time doesn’t have meaning?
Where even rogue planets don’t dare go?
Why is my mind so blank?
The colors that flash before my eyes,
they mean almost nothing to me anymore
I used to dance in the soft orange of a sunset
wade in the blue waters of the distant ocean
What comes after death?
What lies beyond the final breath?
Is the body just a mere shell?
Do we really go to heaven or hell?
Or the murky fields of Asphodel?
Or are we all under a spell?
The river runs deep
Deepened with crimsion
Each death premautre and unjustified
Lives claimed
stolen
devalued
Left behind are family
loved ones
There is a dark hole, thats been growing for a while.
Where there was once light, is now dark, with no desire.
Day by day my body aches, causing the hole to deepen.
We burnt out.
Our flourishing romance withered away
leaving us both as ashes of the people we once were.
Without our vessels,
we touch.
Our ashes attempt to replicate our bodies,
My dark soul takes apart the dread that is life
Leaving behind a empty void waiting to be free and filled
Waiting to be loved and held
While I stare into the void that is myself
I think
Here's to all the kids
who make it through the end
of the day
and wake up for the next one
even though
all they really want to do
is stay
and hide away.
So here I am
Thinking
About the thoughts
That won't come
About the fututre.
And as I think
My mind swirls
And the nothingness
That comes in waves
Stops.
As the steps outside are taken from the once pitch black
demon eyes
garage
yellow gazers...
The desert UPS package rain clouds like adobe hang above me
hazel
a tree in a snowy desert
Death is inevitable.
Alone in the universe with nothing.
The end is vague.
Not defined, or labeled, individual.
Beliefs, religion, gods,
Designed to soothe.
From the Earth, and back.
The real me is like the real you.
Sitting behind the scratched, glass pane separating us,
In our once a week, twenty-minute-monitored conversation.
As we speak through the coils of a half-
I wish i could write about nothing at all.
wouldnt it be interesting to describe nothing?
we couldnt say a color,
How would we know what color it would be?
We couldnt say a shape,
Your writhen thoughts had unexplainable august about them,
I wonder from what this could stem?
They have remarkable semblance to knotted fingers,
The way each twines into my mind and lingers,
Drawing me in,
So beautifully flowing,
so sporadically chaotic,
so miraculously conjoined,
the fact of existance,
so matter-of-fact,
as we live to simply not be.
Nothing may begin if there be no end,
If I could I would
Fill the empty place in hearts
To move on in life
Steady trying to feel in this void. I find myself clenching the sheets, feeling it's texture. Smooth you would've thought... but, it's been layed in so long there's a change. Not one too noticable, but one only the owner knows of.
It is you I dream of night and day,
In my mind is the place you dwell,
It is you that causes my heart to sway,
I hide my love so you can't tell,
A mysterious person you are,
Of all comes none, yet feels as still
some semblance of a substance seen unreal,
echo endless hollow beauty immeasurable.
