Middle Hours

As my head lays motionless on top of a soaked pillow

While my empty music fills the void of the room at midnight

Blank eyes illumanted by wrung out lyrics

I know you'll never be there 

right in my hour of need


Being absent from the pain is lonely

So lonely, I try not to be 

All I do is hide away behind a facade, how vacant my theatere really is

Shows stuck behind rehearsed lines

I try not to want to


I keep rolling around in sheets in the dark

waiting for that last note


I can't help but love it even though I try not to

Turn a deaf ear to my prescence is what I've managed through

Love the way I feel so cold

I love the way it hurts

becasue it reminds me what I'm truly worth in the dark


In the dolor nights I cry myself to a bittersweet felt sleep

I weep in marked time that I'll be in your arms hold/

that you'll love me while I fall apart

I try not to, but hearing the words I want to

makes me more of a mess


I dig until my lip bleeds, till I can barely breathe

with my fingers scratching deep into the wreck I call myself

I am covered by the music in the background

My tears don't have a sound track

but they replay the most dark times where I

hear the words I love at night


"I wish you were here......"


This poem is about: 



(Made this while listening to Ruelle - War Of Hearts. Had some influence in the lyrics.) Do you remember those nights, one of those nights that you cry out in desperation to the night through your music? You can't help but feel so many emotions wrack your body all at once yet still feel numb to the sensation of it. Where your tears are the only source of heat you can feel at the moment alongside the ache you feel in your ribcage. You're not sure where it's coming from but you know it comes out from a bittersweet feeling that will last the whole night through. It's almost an intoxicating perception because you want it to stop, but you are addicted to the pain. You like the pain because it means it is or was special to. It shows that it means a lot in order to be left like you are now.... and...you don't want that importance to leave you so soon. Do you remember those nights?


There is nothing worse then feeling alone, just wanting to be held, wanting to be wanted. 2 a.m.. is honestly the hardest time to be alive. there are nights I'll claw at my skin just trying to escape the pain. your not alone in the way you feel i know exactly what that feels like. thank you for helping me see im not alone either. 


I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. 

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