decision
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A man
A poet
the one whom will put thoughts together
I am a stoic.
but what I am not
is how I create
shift
swirl
change and
re-make.
only my input will increase my stake.
Upon this dusty track I roam to see what I will see
What will come and what has been, all that time brings
And on this trip I laid my sight on an old worn memory
Of two children who were young and full of innocence
Sea shell at the bottom of the wave
water crashing down
forcing it to be brave
as the watchers
sit at the beach
one decides to take a leap
a step
into the wave
to save that shell
When we make decisions we lead with logic or emotion
So the final outcome won’t make us feel like we’re drowning in the ocean
The head makes sense and thinks of the long run
Through that happy dream
Open this wide gray doorYell then step and screamWhat is this place all for?
I am in the throes
of the time of a young life
when all that matters is
which college I will attend.
I always say I am drawn to one.
I wish it was for the pretty
Take a road on the jet-black highway,
You are about to embark on a new adventure,
The scorching sun hits the surface as the heat waves rise,
The eagles fly high above the flower-decorated cacti,
THE EYES SEES A LOT
BUT THE HEART IS SO BLIND
HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHAT YOU OWN
WHEN YOU CANNOT SURVIVE BY YOUR OWN BREATH ALONE
Dear Angelite
My tiny crystal
Light blue like the clear sky
I met you this past summer in a barn at the farm
I realized your power and felt your vibration
Decide
Take your time
Life’s too short
To waste on lies
Tell the truth
But only if it’s right
Right and wrong
You decide
I’m sick and tired
Of hearing that line
Confusions not decisions
Because decisions don't take this long to make.
Head going in circles on which road to take.
Should I go left or should I right.
Mad as a hatter they
Always say.
Down with bloody big
Head or so he says.
Always watching over me,
Thinking that I wouldn't notice him there,
Thinking that I'd be better off with out him.
Dad won't shut up.
Colleges won't give up.
When all the pressure just builds up.
You want to just drop it all.
Scream at the wall.
I'm not good enough anyway.
Let me go astray.
"My thoughts
are stars
I cannot fathom
into
constellaions."
Shooting across
the sky
of my brain.
I try
to change
their position
to avoid
the pain
My fear is not of material things
It's of a choice, and the ripples it beings
I'm so much more than a list of talents
Yet on them, my life hangs in the balance
The question is: who do I want to be
It will be hard and there will be doubt but you don’t give up.
You are weak to the words of the wise around you and second-guess yourself.
everyday
everyday is a struggle,
everyday i, we act like someone else.
to fit in we use sarcasm,
afraid to show eveyone who we are,
we hide,
Not knowing what i was going to see
I found my self in a place where i wanted to be
Mother, why did you to take my life away?
Why couldn’t I be allowed to live?
Why must I never see the world?
Was a grave all that you could give?
I am stuck in a very confined place
Where there are decisions I need to make
But no one can understand my true face
As I proclaim out loud “it’s a piece of cake”
With these thoughts my head spins frantically
So tired of playing the same sick games
Running around in circles playing whose to blame
We fight we fight you’re mad you go date around
Then when you aint happy
Im left to be found
Don't know what to do.
Can't have my cake and eat it too.
I can go to one school and then transfer. Or I can go to another school and transfer somewhere else.
I don't know what I want.
I know what you're thinking
I know just how you feel
The things in life, they don't seem to be real
How can everything end up this way?
How can I alleviate my pain?
When your used to speeding through life,
As I have done in such a short time,
Running every stop sign,
Shifting up through red lights,
Ignoring every sign of caution,
Total disregard for the consequences,
Fret.
Regret.
Anxiety.
Worry.
These are the things that held me down.
These were the things that haunted me
One big confusion. one big disaster, spinning out of control,
Ditch the ground rules,
A bounty of no regrets;
Desires fulfilled against the ethics,
Weaving the art of manipulation.
Mind games to consider realism
As a slash to the crossroads.
" You little brat"
I wouldn't believe you,
I had no reason to.
"That's what you are a brat!"
It was just a little mess,
just clothes on the floor.
"you don't care about anything except your self."
Miles to, hundreds from
Where my hearts pulled
Where the sun drowns
Where the wind doesn't blow,
We sit in silent war.
The cry's cold cut on the brink of hysteria
Is this the end?
Or just the end of the beginning,
The path in front of me seems infinite,
The more I run, the longer it extends.
Yet I can not stop because my heart wills it.
The pain and the agony,
You're walking home from the store
It's burning on the pavement floor
You have this sudden urge, what for?
To pick it up and smoke it
You've never cared to try it
When "peer-pressure" as they call it
Though the walls crumble around us
Though our time may be but short
Though a thousand more surround us
And grim grows the report
Will you choose to stay here?
The choice is as you please
What am I
I love music
I love food
I love soccer
What am I
Do you know
can you tell me
Some say I'm crazy
some say I'm ugly
What am I
What if you were a bird, my dear?
What would happen then?
Would you decide to fly off one day
never to return again?
Imagine if the judgment was switched. Imagine if being hetero was frowned upon. Picture the bullying you would get every day, Since being “straight” tempted you to pull the trigger on the gun. “All you’re good for is breeding,” they would say.
