Stumbling, falling, staggering, bawling
No one cares (Or so I think)
Nothing matters except the bottom of my drink
If I go, who will notice?
I see them staring at me in my misery.
They judge me as they pass.
Hands in pockets, kicking up the litter,
The world goes cold
And once sweet music-bitter.
The last straw has come and gone,
They tell me to cheer up and so on.
But truly, the world doesn’t need me.
With my rope I stand on my chair
I jump, fall
And suddenly my sister is there
But she’s not my sister but me
I see her there, decorating a Christmas tree
She is the me I never got to be.
She looks so happy and gay
Laughing with the family I pushed away
Why didn’t my life go that way?
She had support, love and friends
Even as my life ends
I wonder, would she be me,
If I was everything I was meant to be?
The rope goes taut
Blinking back tears I think
Maybe I should have fought.
Then suddenly I wake,
With a start and a shake.
And I realize, that I’m me,
The me I dreamt of,
The one who I’m meant to be.
So it doesn’t bother me
When I’m told I have no job
No house or money
Because I’m me
I’m the way I was meant to be.