grow up
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A poem dedicated to you, mama.
When did it begin?
When did I begin to resist your kisses, your hugs, your love?
When did I stop seeing you as a beautiful person?
but an ugly fat lady?
I reienvented myself a couple times in high school
I had been a "good girl"
But being a rotten apple started to feel pretty cool
However, my grades made me see that was not the right thing to be
I was a little kid, just yesterday
Eating food at my favorite Tex-Mex place
I would sit in the booth as the waiter would say
“Hey sweetie, what would you like today?”
People, humans, mankind
A bit of a mystery, so it seems
After a bit of growing up you think there’s nothing to redeem
On the outside looking in, it may appear that we have it all together
I can’t stand these dreams anymore.
First, they started as simple nightmares.
Now they control my days and my nights.
I’m exhausted all while awake, but then dread falling asleep knowing ill be restless and tortured again.
Life may be easy,
Life may be hard,
And you'll always wonder,
How it ever came to be.
Life may take them away,
Life may make you astray,
And you'll always wonder,
Why it ever came to be.
When you first find yourself faced with the reality that you’ve “grown up”
You end up stumped with what you are expected to do.
Regardless of the fact that I spent my formative, adolescent years
Pieces of love
Like Water
Grounded
then
Up
Roots
To soak
Up
More love
Pulling leaf over leaf
Up
To small caterpillar kisses
When I was younger, I would dream of sleeping
on cotton candy clouds
while the breeze kissed my hair and fulfilled its duty of safekeeping
The monster.
It always came back to me, haunting me.
My own mother cruel as she has always been
Pushed me closer to the monster.
I was four when it happened. Locked in the bathroom, hugging and sobbing together while the police were outside trying to keep my parents from not being in the same room together.
Can you picture me?because no more fight is left in meand I don't want to go on.I am not a person who beleives in miraclesand I refuse to beleive thatI will be successful.I will say to the world,
Princesses are perfect, they glitter just so
At least that’s what I thought, at five years old
I wanted a knight, who gleamed and shone
To climb up my tower and carry me home
When you claim to not be a child, it's like
Saying you can breath underwater or see through walls:
Only a child thinks that.
But to say an adult cannot be a child
My mother carried me around the same way she carried her purse;
Right by her side, hanging off her shoulder.
The only catch- you can't be emotionally available to a purse.
The morning after his mother passed
Into some great valley of comfort and stars
My father sat by his computer.
“Listen to this song,” he told me--
Like so many times before--
We all grow up, but we don't all glow up.
Some of us just need to take responsibility and show up.
Helping others by learning about the injustices, we get woke up.
We all grow up, but we don't all glow up.
Some of us just need to take responsibility and show up.
Helping others by learning about the injustices, we get woke up.
Life as I knew it, changed,
Going from palm to pine tree sways,
My ways had become estranged,
Sitting in the backseat, heading away
Away to a place, a new home
sixteen
Lips on lips, never felt more sure,
that I'd give myself up and make me your own.
The sunlight could not compare
to the glistening specks of hazel;
Open your bible, pray for forgiveness, tell him your sins, the lord is your witness.
We are all children of God with free will; we are family, you know.
Then why in the definition of religion is the word control?
Now that I'm a "grown-up," it's time for me to go to college.
College is a canyon of mountainous buildings, each marked with a letter of the alphabet,
Each made up of halls, upon halls, upon halls, upon halls...
Highschool.
College preparation, scholarships, grades
Weed, alcohol, making out
Living up to every non expectation
Stereotypical, but the polar opposite
It wasn't when I found myself walking through the gates
We met when we were eleven.
We had a group of friends,
but they all fell away
one-by-one.
We were the only two that stayed.
We spent our nights baking cakes together
There were always those small moments:
The first time I drove myself to a friends
The first time I told my mom I was going to be my friends’ DD
We all have a story,
Be it painful, joyful, or forgotten.
We all had dreams of our futures,
And they were probably discarded.
We grew up, some of us too fast,
A gold mirror always hung on my wall,
I've never seem to think of it at all.
It was there when I lost my first tooth,
to the years of my bloom of youth.
As the years past
And went by fast,
Looking up at the bright blue sky,
My two best friends next to me,
Eating ice cream with the sweet sound of the ice cream truck in the background
Talking about middle school, clothes, the future,
Looking back,
It's easy to forget, you know?
That time can pass when you aren't paying attention
And suddenly, your little sister says she likes that boy,
And your little brother is taller than you are,
Growing up doen't always mean getting older,
it means maturing as a person, and realizing your true values in life.
Anyone and everyone will get older over time,
but it takes effort to grow your intellectual state.
came to the house early
my first house party
first of the twelfth month
stayed long after it was done
after the first handshake, the thought of me was a flake
unwanted unneeded
Upon a mirror, I stand
Confused and in a daze.
I search among the superficial
and find myself amazed.
My body is changing, my hips are wide,
But I know it's something more.
I hold a flower in my hand
It's been with me since I was born
Delicate to the eye, soft to the touch
Perfect, taintless, lily white
As I run and as I play
I try to keep my flower clean
Everyone says your old now
That its your time to explore and mature
Excuse me, but I am not a scow
I am someone who can be easily detoured
I am still young and unsure
Get Out of Here
Get out of here with your sensitive ass
Just wait, it will all pass
You speak as if your emotions are glass
You jump to conclusions way too fast
My childhood was filled with simple joys,
raindrops dancing on summer-scented skin
and soaking my downy head to the scalp,
belly laughs for so long they hurt
There was a time in everyone's life whenMagicWas an acceptable answerImaginationRuled your worldAnd wishesWere made on starsWhen everyone's dream was to be president
I never grew up with the gardens of flowers and fairies.
The sunbeams dodged me with as much vigor as the raindrops aimed for me.
My garden was full of broken walls, debris from the joy I once felt.
Who will you be?
Will you grow up without me?
Or will we stay here?
Under the golden sphere?
Or maybe under the silver moon?
While you act like a loon?
What about today?
blue eyes and green hair
we all started somewhere
juvenile games played
ignoring all the bad grades
best friends with an attitude
teasing boys and being prude
never knowing what to expect
