My God, My God

I begged you for forgiveness

But you sat on your throne a laughed

I know you gave me my time with him like I asked you too

You gave me his love so you could watch me

As you took it all away from me forever

I don't know what to believe anymore

But if I don't stay here, where do I go?

In spite of your playing, your toying with me

The punishment for love, the reward for hate

I still cannot believe in anything else

I think I deserve it even if I do not

Because you told me I do, and I believe

I've never even thought about leaving you

I never thought that anything else was right

I never thought about what would happen if I decided to run

I can't say I don't believe in you

I mean, I'm literally talking to you right now

But what am I supposed to do when all you've done

Is destroy everything I tried to create?

Are you scared of me? Of what I might become?

Am I more powerful than you?

I can't believe that I am because I've never been allowed to

I don't think I am, I can't be

You created a universe, this earth, these people, all of it

I can't simply think of something and see it before me

I can't fix anything, I can't make any of this better

I am powerless at your feet

And I accept that, but I hate it with every fiber of my being

You gave me nothing to go on, but I don't mind you being in control

I've given that much up to you in sacrifice to preserve my place at your side

But why must you take and take and take and take

When all I've ever done is give?

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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