Afraid it will come back
Up like a shadow
Up like his smoke
Rolling in with the tide
Even when I hide
I'm afraid it will find me
I'm afraid I'm still to week to fight
Because I remember how
Giving up was once so simple
I let it take over my body
I cared to much
But cared to little
I know that's a tricky line
To try to understand
But it's exactly what it was like
I couldn't live up to perfectionism
So I pretended not to care
I couldn't change the world
So I pretended I could bare
Bare the pain I took in
From her eyes
From the memories that haunt in my mind
Bare to know I can't be perfect
I can't save her
to save my life
Even when finally things are over
In the back of my mind my hands are still tied
I'm trying to reach out to the past
But I can't
I can't change the past that left me so flawed
Flawed with scars
Flawed with these nightmares
Flawed with regret and guilt
Flawed
Even after I have met the standards
Flawed like no other