Alzheimers
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Walking the brightly lit halls of white walls and pastels.
Past the family holding hands in the doorway.
Past the woman looking frantically from face to face.
As if she really knows what she’s looking for.
My grandfather, in his simple way, informed me that he has dementia. Twice, today, he informed me that he has dementia and he is lucky. He forgot. And he forgets that he forgot.
Who is she?
The one who takes care of me?
Is she the one I loved,
But yet I don’t remember her,
From yesterday or any of the days before.
Dear Grandma Great,
I've learned so much from you, but there's much you don't recall
I know it's in there somewhere, but you can't find it all.
You made me laugh when I wanted to cry
I am from arable land
From tall scratching grass and hum of electric cattle wire
I am from stolen sweetpeas and muddy carrots, slipped through to the old white draft-horse
Too Fast
Time,
slipping away out of my buttery-like grasp,
escaping from my memory,
seeming uncapable to catch,
ticking further from reach.
They never lie when they say,
I watched with a broken heart,
and tears in my eyes,
As my beloved grandmother,
took hold of her eternal prize.
She suffered greatly in this world,
The world’s best computer
Here in my head,
Is all I need
Until I am dead.
The ability to reason
And think and decide,
If I should run
Or if I should hide.
"Who are you?"
My family had no clue who I am,
And it crushed me every time.
They were scared, not knowing where they were.
I'm scared I'm next.
They struggled to remember.
Who are you?
I'm Kimberlyn -
The one who spent
Every weekend,
And those sticky, sweet, Georgia summers
At your house making memories.
The one that glistened
Every Christmas
It slowly crawls behind a person
Like a shadow in the early stages of life
The few who leave early
do not get consumed by something so divine
A twinkling shade of innocenceA meteor in a pitch-black nightA tranquil glance with adorationA significant message to a blank mindThe blankness at a speckA tradegy diffuses itself
I still remember when you used to look at me without glossed over eyes,
I still remember when you took me fishing as we sat for hours beneath the bright and shining sky.
"There is magic every night.
A celestial tide.
Capture pen and parchment light,
Unstitch the ever darkened skies,
And print its memories.
To keep these visions long alive,
Rest your eyes.
Honey, hold me tight
I may have to leave soon
Kiss me softly like you have so many times
Whisper “I love you” in my ear as sweet as you have before
Disease: dark, empty.
Waiting for hours.
That strange thing,
of disappearing
It would be just me,
if she vanished.
The world beyond was black.
(poems go here) As he wakes all is forgotten
Opening a new world full of the unknown
Our eyes swell with tears
While we sit back and feel the pain
Not knowing what he will forget next
My life is stuck on repeat
