Maybe I Do
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I sat with you when you got angry.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I held your hand and told you to take deep breaths.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I helped you stumble into bed night after night and brushed your hair back as you wretched.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I tended to your wounds after fights like a nurse.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I bandaged myself discretely after you took your anger out on me and then crawled into your arms.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I tried to get help for you-- and for me.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I complied when you didn't want it.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I let you pressure me into things I didn't want.
Because I loved you, and maybe I do,
I ignored all the signs.
But, because of a new-found love for me,
I have learned that I might love you less than before.
Because I love me, and maybe I do,
I'll have to leave the love I once held.
Because I love me, and maybe I do,
I will hold my head up high.
Because I love me, and maybe I do,
I will get help, with or without your permission.
Because I love me, and maybe I do,
I will speak out.
Because I love me, and maybe I do,
I will not be afraid of the monsters that once lurked over my shoulder.
Because I love me, and maybe I do,
I will find a way to start over and love myself, not just maybe. Completely.