self-hatred

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I know sometimes you feel like you don't deserve this that your core is nothing but a steaming pile of junk. And I know you feel like it's all your fault and you need to say sorry
The little people in my head never go away. There’s anxiety,  Finding the negative in the outside world.
Winter begins when our eyes meet We cast our icy stares at each other And I'm frozen where I stand I pound the glass in frustration You do the same The same idea must be crossing your mind
The mirror cries long tears to the bus station Her feet draw their mottled shapes on the Pavement It is wet and cold.   In my mouth, there lies elegant blood
Come, come, come with me Let’s embrace each other,  seep into me. It’s warm and deep.   But there’s something underneath.  
We, the new generation, are the dream. We, dentist smiles and thin, diet bodies. Fluorescent lights, hope for a star to deem
I forgot I’m forgetting I’m forgotten Since I got away from you for solid years, Built up confidence like a Berlin wall that separated my mind from people like you.
I’m a poster child with no more room on the wall, And I want to be the molly ringwald of every situation. The eyes in the back of my head hear you talking bad about me,
Pause in the mirror Stare into the heart attack waiting to happen  Smack flab lost in the caramel center  Drunken slurs slosh and slip from innards thrown outwards
My vision goes hazy My mind a little crazy suffocating, palpating my heart is tighter than my fist clenched, back drenched in sweat
She doesn't cry anymore. Instead she smiles. But her wrists cry. They cry rivers of red. But nobody notices. Not until she's dead.
There is a woman in my mind whoseshell grows and crumbles, collapsesand is rebornendlessly. A statue, a castlein some ancient landthat was first etched on archaic blueprints and
Brushing my teeth I use extra-strength whitening paste But look at your teeth, the Voice says. They're all nasty and yellow. I see a bottle of polish sitting by my sink
You judged me
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