When the Inside Doesn't Match the Outside.

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In the beginning, I owned two masks. One was a Barbie, one was a Power Ranger. 

 

On the inside, all I wanted to wear was Superman underwear and a Power Ranger mask. 

 

On the outside, I had to wear dresses and bows to go with my Barbie mask. I was told girls have to wear bows and dresses. 

 

I didn't understand why I couldn't wear what I wanted to wear.

 

Why can't girls play with GI Joe's?

 

Why can't I use the boys bathroom?

 

Why can't I wear swim trunks to the pool if I want to?

 

I lived life with the desire to do what other boys did, but was instead forced to do what the girls did.

 

I didn't know what my thoughts and feelings meant.

 

Until in high school when I found a video titled transgender.

 

Even though I had a label for my thoughts and feelings,  I still carried both of my masks. 

 

it was ingrained in me to care about what other people thought.

 

I was a representation of my mother.

 

To make her happy, I had to be a perfect Barbie doll.

 

So I wore my Barbie mask at all times when in her presence.

 

At my dad's house, I could be myself. I could wear my Superman underwear and Power Ranger mask. 

 

At school, I was in between. Very few people knew my true self, so I had to conceal my inner identity.

 

Society and my surroundings prevented me from removing my masks to reveal my whole self. 

 

When I was 18, I got tired of carrying both of my masks.

 

My mom threw me and my Power Ranger mask out, and I moved in with my dad.

 

She unchained me from my Barbie mask, and gave me the opportunity to be my true self.

 

Today, I get to live without any masks.

 

I was able to transition to make my body match my mind. 

 

I am proud of who I am today.

 

No one should have to hide behind masks and curtains. 

 

Society doesn't always accept it when you show your entire self. 

 

You just have to accept yourself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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