standing at the mirror and i look like a shell of myself skin stretched over bone, barely hanging on, but so am i dark circles reflecting dark corners of my mind that attack me at night like monsters playing hide and go seek impossible to catch i have opened up lately to the pain, the heartachecrisp white air fills me up as i breathe inblossom i am a flower maybe wilting a little but still a flower these hands, these branches wrap around and hug others in the day and myself at nightthis heart, these roots dig deep and plant my feet into this ground there is no place like home but where is home the chemicals, the monsters have built a home inside my mindthis cannot be life but i have never felt like i was living more than in this stale momentartificial it feels but is a sweet artificial i do not understand the millions of things i feel but i do understand that i am not supposed to i stand and let myself flow in the water that is running in the bathroom sink below me water rushes i see my reflection in it i have surely been here before and i will surely be here again if i am a flower, i must water myself and let myself grow