I used to sit alone in bed and cry.
As tears streamed down my face I wondered when I'd find my place.
I'd think to myself "why do I even try?".
Days and nights passed and it was all the same.
I felt dead, could never get rid of the pounding in my head.
I couldn't feel anything, I just wanted to feel something, even pain.
No one addressed the problem, no one wanted to hurt me.
Or maybe no one gave a shit, maybe I wasn't worth it.
One morning I woke up and brewed a cup of my favorite tea.
I decided I was more than the girl who just sits and cries and doesnt live her life.
I ran 2 miles,
I did my make up for me, dressed all pretty and went to the city.
I stopped giving a fuck that no one cared and stopped being the girl who never had a smile.
I live my life happy day by day, and I don't care what other people say.
I used to sit alone in bed in cry.
Now when I think about those nights, all i can do is wonder "why?".