Not Alone

Sun, 05/24/2015 - 20:13 -- Xanna

You say
I'm not alone but
My tears pool
And drop to the floor
None next to me to hear
My sobs
None next to me to soothe
My pain racked body
The blood drips
To splat on the ground
No one is here
No one can help me
Lying broken
On the floor
Painting in blood
Abstract, expressionistic
Everything is distorted
And my head is swirling
But there is not a soul
That I can lean on
To steady myself
Stumbling down the streets
Looking like just another drunk
But being sober as hell
Drunk only on
The hope
That one day
There might be
One person
Just one
Who might be there for me
Falling
And just laying there
On the floor
No hand offered
To help me up
So I stay
On the ground
To be trampled on
By imaginary feet
My thrown voice echoes across the
Empty space
There is nobody there
To even question
Why I was shouting
In the first place
And it's the painful truth
Because it's been so long
That I've been alone
That I don't even hope
And the ghosts I used to imagine
Don't exist now
And the drop of blood on the floor
was joined by many more
And my sobs got louder
My body, more pained
More broken than before
When I fall
I don't just fall
I collapse
I can't even bring myself
to stumble
down the streets
My voice is no longer
Shouting out
Can barely
Reach a whisper
Now tell me again
How I'm not alone
And think
If maybe there was
Someone next to me
How would I have turned out
Do you think I would still
be laying here
Surrounded
In my own blood
Finally happy
To have someone embrace me
Even if it is only death
Who wraps his arms around me

This poem is about: 
Me

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