My Fault

Fri, 10/04/2013 - 19:56 -- Jay328

Location

The truth has been spoken
With the words that was suppose to
Set me free
But instead hurt more feelings
Than my own
I didn't intend for this to happen

I only wanted my shattered
Emotions to be expressed in
Silent remorse
And for the first time
I have seen the damage
Of my own words

Wishing, hoping, and praying
To one day take them all back
Never could I express my sorrow
I feel as if I have killed another
For my own benefits
As if trying to create one's

Own Pleasure
But in the action of destroying
Something else's before it is formed
Regretting the moments
Constantly beating myself up
For acting as if I was a child

Not wanting to let go of those
Piggy baby days
Or the times when I was only
Knee high
But just knowing that next year
I will be proceeding to high school

To be completely honest I was scared
Of the thought of changing
And from then on those days may never
Even be spoken of again
I guess in my own personal defense
I myself was being most selfish

As in not wanting to share
The most valuable person in my life
With anyone
And with a new person in the house
Plus the simple thought that I have to go to
High school next year

Were teenage girls are most subject to change
For the worst not the best
Maybe it just all got so overwhelming
For me to handle in a mature manner
Which I fully understand
I can be hard to deal with

And some times I dont like even myself
Any more than others do
When I get that way
Honest and truly I would just love to
Act like the child
I longed to continue to be
But I understand as I get older

You aren't allowed to do that anymore
Besides I dont really wanna
Grow up just yet
Just to have a few moments
Of being real childish
But to everyone this applies to

I would like to apologize to you
Because lately I have invented
A new way to over-react
And right now I have come to terms
With the fact that it's about
The time to grow up

But of course I won't do it all at once

 

     

Guide that inspired this poem: 

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