My Big Red X

Depression is a stigma

A giant red X on my back
Marking the spot for insults to land
And 'well meaning advice' to grab on
 
'Just don't think about it'
'It'll get better soon'
'Be happy and it'll go away'
 
People think about depression
As a second side of me
A person standing next to me
That I can simply shoo away
 
Depression is a voice in my head
My own voice 
Pointing out my flaws and mistakes
Like I don't already see them
Showing me all the ways I could just 
End it
 
Being announced as depressed
Has marked me 
So all those who need to be amused
Can make remarks about if I cut
Saying I should make train tracks
Up and down my arms with blood
 
Suddenly every time I am out sick
It is because I cut too deep
And am too ashamed to admit it
In their minds this is cause enough
To silently scour me for new scars
Ones they assume I put there
Another reason to call me emo
Say I've just got the 'blues'
 
Where did that even come from?
The 'blues'?
If anything, depression is grey
Bleak and empty
Destructive yet overlookable 
 
Depression is my big red X
The one others point at and stare
 
 
 

 

Comments

ritergirl

sadly true, alot of people in my family deal with depression but still alot of others in my family are just like you described. 

if this is true for you i hope those idiots get over themselves and stop making themselves feel better by pointing out your flaws because i'm positive they aren't any more perfect than you.

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