I keep telling myself that it's all going to be okay,
I keep saying it's going to get better with each day.
But its all a lie.
How can I move on when I caused you to die?
There is no healing, there is no way to hide,
There is no justice for how you died.
The choice was mine,
It was I that cut your life line.
It was all me,
I wasn't ready to be your Mommy.
I wasn't prepared to care for an innocent child
Especially in this world that's so wild.
It was selfish and wrong,
Yet I still went forward and played along.
Now I'm here thinking of you,
Wishing that this reality was untrue.
I gave up on you way too soon,
I should've gotten up and left that room.
But I laid there and let them tear you apart,
Now I'm here with a shattered heart.
I will never get to see who you would have been,
But I will forever be responsible for this sin.
Everyday I think of you,
And everynight I cry in the presence of the moon.
I was supposed to be your mother,
But I turned into your murderer.
As confusing as it seems,
I still think of you in my dreams.
In my mind I feel guilty,
My soul feels empty,
And in the moments when I begin to cry,
It's because I'm thinking of you Sky.
No matter what anyone else thinks of what I've done,
In my heart I'm always your mom.
I know that you are up there looking down on me.
Someday will come and I will finally get to see,
The precious face of my first baby.
I will never forget you, no matter how hard I try
Mommy will always love her angel named Sky.