where to start

where to place the blame

where did i stop being a kid

maybe it was when my fifth grade teacher told me

i couldnt wear shorts skirts because  the boys would look,

maybe it was when my sixth grade teacher said my shirt was too tight 

maybe it was when seventh grade boys "accidentally" brushed 

their hands against my butt,

maybe it was when my best friend in eighth grade had to pretend to be my boyfriend

to keep the other guys from harassing me,

maybe it was when in ninth grade i got told my dress had to be

longer than my fingertips , 

maybe it was when 10th grade came and i got dresscoded for my favorite pair of

leggings because i was too skinny,

maybe it was the first go at eleventh grade when my bf was sexually abusing and

assaulting me but everyone asked what i was wearing and if i was on drugs

maybe it was when my school counselors kept trying to make me friends with my

attacker  and i attempted suicide,

maybe it was when that same year i was forced to deny what happened or risk

facing charges of slander bc the emotionally distubed boy couldnt be lying,

maybe it was when  my teacher was warned i would breakdown if we watched

videos about sexual assault and abusdive relationships and i had to watch anyway,

maybe my point is that i dont remember when i stopped being a kid that all i

know is it was A LONG TIME AGO .