Letter to myself, before I was a survivor.

Hey kid.

Keep doing what you’re doing

I know sometimes it hurts to exist

I know no one seems to understand

I know you’re afraid to tell them

There’s so much we will never tell

So many secrets between you and I

I’m case you’re wondering

We’re still single

I know I promised we wouldn’t be alone

But we’ve embraced alone

Loneliness is only as scary as you make it

And we have friends now

Not like the friends you had

We have friends who stay

Friends who ask if we are alright

Friends who check in out of love

Friends who text first

Friends who make you laugh

Make you smile

Friends who you don’t have to hide for.

And I know people keep telling you that things will get better

That we will get better

And I know you never believed such things,

That things would get better.

But they did. Maybe not in every way

Maybe not how we’d hoped

But things got better

And I’m sorry

I’m sorry that we never really did

That our head is still full of storm clouds

See, I didn’t get better,

I just taught myself how to survive

And sometimes that’s just as good.

Teach yourself how to breathe

How to stand tall and walk again

Because although you may always have days when the shadows block out the sun,

You will also make so many memories

And you will be so glad to be here

And that you didn’t miss it.

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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