Sat, 04/09/2016 - 12:34 -- kebyrd

They ask me what I could never do without

and I am tempted to say a name or a place

But I realize now what I could not survive without

This faith I have in believing in something as big as myself

and the pain it has taken to realize my strength

Confidence is not the same, oh no, for I have a minimal amount

But faith, faith is the trust I have in my heart and mind

The friction I feel when someone I love crosses the road without looking twice

The heartfelt longing I have to be something great and to do something great

It’s knowing that I don’t have to have someone by my side to be happy or to feel whole

The strength and determination in my soul to continue on even when I feel the darkness closing in

and the black night is dragging me down by my feet

It’s the fight and the will and the idea of never giving up and never stopping the dreams I had when I was seven years old

The dreams of being on a stage and singing to another little girl who will become someone even greater than me

The dreams of painting a picture of the one I love and seeing tears form in their eyes because they now see how much I adore them

The dreams that I hold onto in the day when I  get sad and when I need the magical, enchanting sparkle to return that left my eyes when he did

I realize through misfortune and haunting memories

I find out by the look my mother gives me as I break down all because I’ve held it in too long

I know after every mistake and every heartbreak

The tears I release create a map for me to follow on my worst days

And I understand

I understand now that I have faith to move mountains and rocks and rivers as wide as the cracks he left in my heart

And not only do I possess this faith, but I have it in myself

Because after everything, I see how strong and unbreakable we can be

I see how beautiful the scars of life can be on our hearts

They ask what I can’t live without

Now I know it is this faith I have created for myself

for without it I could no longer survive

because this faith is the only reason I'm breathing.

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