Equanimity

Mom always worked, leaving me in care of a grandmother.

In her care, I was taking care of myself. At 6 I had to learn to feed myself because I knew Grandmother wouldn't get out off the couch to feed me.
My mom always worked. I never understood why. Bills weren't a concept I could grasp.

In my adulthood. I understand the neglect, for reason otherwise we'd have nothing to eat.

I grew up alone, no siblings just an aunt and uncle three years older than I.

I grew accustomed to the loneliness that turned into my introversion. That lead to me being violently trapped in my mind. Unable to speak for myself. Or being indecisive when someone asked me anything.

And in my adulthood, I had to unlearn myself out of the cell I built in my mind.

I had to forgive myself, allow myself to be verbal. To speak about the pain I feel.

I can't hold anyone responcible. At the young age I didn't understand. I didnt know what I was fighting. I just knew I couldn't stay in my private cell. To free myself of the pain that shut me down.

My mother left me alone, and alone I stayed.

This poem is about: 
Me
Poetry Terms Demonstrated: 

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