Darkness envelops me from that speck of light that I aimed to reach for
Parents didn't believe in my depression and marked it off as "wants for attention"
"You have no personality." The girl says to me in a haunting voice that spirals around my mind
Looking towards my sister for hopes of an understanding towards my feeling, nothing.
Having sweet dreams of the Pills locked in my parents medicine cabinet, so I could live in Wonderland.
Seeing the beautiful Caucasian models in posters and TV screens, as I stare in dreadfulness at my Afro- puffs and baby hair.
Writing down in tears everything that I hate hate about myself with my door locked from reality.
Applying dark eyeliner on top of my eyes to disappear from this pure hell.
"Let's hang out this weekend." A girl says to me but, I shake my head as I slowly lose more interest in everything.
Staring at him as he walks out with my friend hand out in hand, leaving me alone and in heartbreak.
Depression handed me a ladder to crawl back into it as no one stood by my side...
Suddenly, A pencil rolled by my eyelids as I grabbed it and noticed a Journal lay by me.
I think about the hate I have for myself as a person, my envy towards my beautiful sister, my loneliness of my parents, my heartbreak of him and the lost of me as a once blissful little girl.
Grabbing onto the pencil and digging my nails into it with pure anger, I write endlessly expressing every single hidden thought I could never express.
Thoughts and words of suicide flow from my hand as well as my love for him is revealed.
Those words stem endlessly saving me from the actions of commiting suicide.
All my words that I could never confess or even convey in such simple words stem eloquently from my pen like the paper fostered its growth.
Standing here strong and still alive in 2016, I live my days loving myself and still recovering my darkest days, owing parts of my recovery to Poetry.