I am let down once again.

Always, always, always

I am let down. Set to the side. Forgotten about. Never cared for.

I don’t know why I always get my stupid hopes up.

I should already know that you do not care about me in the same way that I care about you. 

I hate you for letting me down.

Forgetting about me and not returning my feelings.

For befriending me and making me fall for you.

I hate you for always comparing me to another girl you are in love with.

But out of everything that I hate, I hate that you are so nice to me. You are so unaware of how your niceness has made me fall in love with you. 

Now everything that you do hurts me. 

Makes me feel so depressed.

Feel…

Unloved

Unwanted

My heart not only shatters in a thousand pieces, but it also rips in a million more. 

I thought maybe I could make you fall for me.

We hang out so much, that I thought maybe one day.. just one day you’ll look at me as the sunlight radiates on my skin and you’ll fall in love with me. 

Maybe if I giggled a little extra. Smiled a little extra you’ll see what you meant to me. 

In all the time that we spent together, almost every day this year, maybe I’ll mean something more to you then just a friend. 

And I do wonder if you do feel anything… just even the slightest affection for me…

I want to tell you. But I cannot. I will not. I am forbidden to.

But if I could, I would. 

Maybe that’ll be my last wish… one of my last wishes.

To let you know what you meant to me and all of the pain you put me through.

For now, I hate you. I hate you for forgetting about me.