In The World
We live in the world
Where a man’s words are taken as more trustworthy
Than thirty women’s truths
Half of the human race sits silent
To allow atrocities to happen to them
Before them
To their mothers and grandmothers and generations before.
We live in the world
Where fathers tell daughters to be careful
Instead of telling sons to not assault and abuse
Where consent is just a pleasantry
That can be ignored when excuses comes along
We live in the world
Where consent is determined by the shortness of your skirt
Or the shortness of your breath after a drink
In which alcohol is an excuse for assault
And flirting is an excuse for rape
And what do we say to the battered women?
“You deserved it.”
“You asked for it.”
“Your skirt says otherwise.”
“You were drunk.”
“You are a liar; he is a good man.”
And what do we say to the men?
“She deserved it.”
“She asked for it.”
“Her skirt said otherwise.”
“She was drunk.”
“She is a liar; you are still a good man.”
We live in the world
Where we do not see these parallels
And if we connect the dots
If we dare to tell the truth
We are “feminists”
In the worst way
Because we believed her over a man
Because we trusted her story was true
Because we saw the scars and spoke up
Because seeking equality means shame
And seeking the truth means shame
And telling the truth means shame
Especially if it comes from you
A woman.
We live in the world
Where evidence is evidence
Until it comes from lips with lipstick
Or people with higher voices
Or worse, victims
Because we the people
The jury of peers
Mostly men, mostly prejudiced, mostly abusers instead of abused
Would rather believe
That our brothers are good
Than to accept the fact
That people have faults
That are hidden from us, their closest confidants.
We live in the world
Where despite the accuracy
Of 98%
The 98% who are true
The 98% of men who did it
Are insisted to be the 2% who did not
Because if a woman says so, she is a liar
But for a man to say so
To say he did it and to admit it
Is a normal thing to be accepted
That’s what the numbers say, right?
We live in the world
Where the second a man denies assault
Despite having the odds against him
We believe him
Because he is our friend.
Whereas the second a woman tells her tale
Despite having a 98% chance of telling the truth
We do not believe her
Because she is threatening our male friend.
We live in a world
Where rape kits sit in the back of police stations
As boxes of people’s most traumatic moments
Moments they’ll never forget
But moments forgotten by society
Where the kits are collected like button caps on the back of our backpacks
Where these kits are so common
That they stay there
Stuck in time
Stuck in space
Stuck in our minds
Until the kits stack up so high they could have built a castle for you and the abused to hide in
We live in the world
Where that castle and its sturdy walls
Those walls that could have protected you from your abuser
Those walls that could have shielded the accusations of being false
And the moats of DNA tests
And the bridges of utterly binding evidence
Are useless
Because a man’s words can blow the whole thing down.
We live in the world
Where when a woman comes out of that castle
When she takes a step outside of those sturdy walls of evidence and truth
We shout at her
“You’re a liar!”
“You’re only seeking attention!”
And we jeer
“Why didn’t you speak up earlier?”
“Why can we trust you?”
But why can we trust him?
Can they not see
That the reason women hide behind these walls of silence
That the reason women fill moats of frustration with evidence
Evidence that may convict him
Evidence that may prove to the world he is wrong
Evidence that may prove our innocence and our survival and our victimization was all true
Is to avoid the situation where our own fathers call us liars?
We live in the world
Where the scars on her body
The broken ribs
The neck stained with where he touched her
Where he touched “someone’s daughter”
Are all just accidents where she fell down the stairs
Until we see him in handcuffs
And even then, she is a lair.
We live in the world
Where women are forevermore the liars of society
And no matter how much evidence we gather
How many stories we prove true
How many times we show our scars over and over to prove that something happened until they are faded away and until the memory of him and his hands on her neck are gone
We are always the liars
Because we are women
And he is a man.