Wane and Wax

Facing the light I walk through unplanned days,
The hours went slow and they hung me in a daze,
Ringing bells of laughter and singing improvised songs,
I took things for granted but not to do wrongs,
Full moon faces, round and bright,
A child I had been, still learning what's right.

"Keep facing the light and you'll see no shadows",
But my eyes start to focus and the road begins to narrow,
I sat in my wild daydreams but my eyes catch a crow,
They push my nest into the river and tell me to, "Row, row, row",
The water's moving steady yet my time's beginning to wane,
I make haste with the paddle when the clouds threaten rain.

Trust in the sun's light though the path may seem long,
The water is now rapids but my arms have grown strong,
I'll run, I'll swim, I'll fly high and soar,
I'll stand tall, be brave, and let out my roar,
The air feels heavy and the pouring falls in retort,
Not a quarter to the finish and my courage falls short.

Not enough, not enough,
The journey's too tough,
The last crescent of hope is slipping away,
My thoughts jumble up and my heart's in a fray,
But still the tugging and pushing of determination prevails,
My boat stays sturdy and in the wind flies my sails,

In the distance it shines: a sign of new futures,
A step away from my boat and into unfamiliar junctures,
My workload's tripled and my free freedom's over,
But every footfall's a chapter that brings another closer,
The old me lives, we weren't reborn,
The feather-light heart is gone but there's no need to mourn.

A landmark with a new start,
I know there's hope in my heart,
Though road bears no sign,
I know where I'll align, 
New me tells the old me,
I'll decide who to be.

Waxing and waning,
Filling my new self with training,
With a clear, renewed sight, 
I'll put up with a new fight,
I'll run, I'll swim, I'll fly high and soar,
I'll stand tall, be brave, and let out my roar.

Facing the gray I tread through planned out days,
The hours sped fast and leave me in a daze,
Ringing phones in business and listening to written songs,
I see from all sides but there's no avoiding wrongs,
Full moon faces, round and bright,
A more experienced person I am, still learning to do right.

This poem is about: 


Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741