I can't hold on,
I can't let go...


I keep on breathing
But each breath is suffocating.
My heart keeps pounding
But in my own blood,
I'm sinking.


I wanna hold on,
I wanna let go...


Smiling if I'm sad.
Frowning when I'm glad.
The past feels like a dream,
The future, a nightmare.


I'm not holding on,
I'm not letting go...


Here's the feeling I can't express:
There's a fret I can't suppress.
Words, thoughts
I've been screaming to you
Come back as whispers
Like I'm talking to my echo.


Tired of holding on,
Afraid of letting go...


I don't wanna die
But I keep on killing myself.
I need a reason to live.
I need the sun to wake me
From my restless sleep.


I can't hold on,
I can't let go...


Hands stuck in the solid air,
Standing on waters, crystal clear.
Hanging on to the nothingness,
Begging for help from the emptiness.


If I did hold on,
If I do let go...


If I fall deep into the sea,
I only wanted to see:
If I disappear,
Would anyone care?
Shed a single tear?
Pull me up here?


As the gravity drags me deeper...
As the light vanishes from my sight...
As the waters conceal that I am crying...


As I keep on holding on,
As I finally let go...
As I talk to my echo...
And drowning...

Written
11 September 2016


Revised
10 November 2018


Copyright
© Khayri R.R. Woulfe. All rights reserved.