Suicide Note

Im writing these words so that if anybody is to find this, they'll finally understand

The pain I was going through and just how deep it went

How blinded i was by the darkness

That its not their fault and they couldn't have saved me

That im (hopefully) in a better place and not suffering anymore

That i loved them but lost sight of the fact that they loved me

That i hope i didn't hurt them too much in this decision

That i tried but i just couldn't take the pain anymore

That i’de been planning this for a while

That i was already gone before i left

That my soul was already dead, i was just disposing of an empty shell

That there was nothing anyone could have done to wake me up

That my demons had tightened their grip and i had to let go

That they shouldnt mourn for me i'm (hopefully) better now

That it was over for me even before I ended me

That i was falling but there was nobody to catch me

That I was drowning and couldn't swim to safety

That i'm sorry, im sorry, im sorry

And thank you for everything you did for me

Goodbye. 

 

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

weepingwillowtree

i was going to end myself on the 5th but instead i told my therapist. i was sent to a psychiatric hospital and was kept there for a week. although i still hurt i no longer plan on killing myself, and i just wanted to shutout to anyone out there struggling with thoughts of suicide. please, please don't do it. tell someone, get help you wont regret it, we need you here, you matter, you have a purpose, and you are stronger than this. i am here for you and i just want so badly to make you understand how much you are needed. please stay. i love you, you are amazing, you can do this. 

Trans-and-tired

I hope that you see this reply and it doesn't just sit unread but about a month ago you commented on one of my poems. That was the first-ever comment I've ever gotten on my works and it made my day because I put a lot of myself into my work which makes me feel horrible when that work is received badly. I've been to the psych ward so while I don't understand the struggle you are going through I do understand the struggle. I finally got a laptop and checking my power poetry account is one of the first things I did since my parents check my phone and I didn't want to risk them seeing my account. I finally got to look at the account of the person who commented on my poem, you, I don't know if it helps or even if it makes a difference but your comment has gotten me through a lot. I don't know how much thought you put into it or if you were just being nice but that one comment helped remind me that I have allies and that I won't be in the depression hole forever. Know that when things feel bad and that when everything hurts even your smallest actions can make the biggest difference for somebody else and that you have allies too.

weepingwillowtree

thank you so much for this. it really means a lot to me, i really needed this comment. i did actually put a lot of thought into that comment, you are a very strong poet. im always here for you.

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741