Living a dead life.
Full of hatred towards love.
I take forced breaths.
Sometimes I wish I could gather up the energy to stop them.
I complain about the life I have,
but I made it this way.
And I am doing nothing to change it.
Im actually just making it worse.
They say God never closes one door
without opening another.
But I find myself trying to break down
and open the ones He has closed.
And when I see the ones that He has opened,
I close them.
I do not realize what I am doing until it is too late.
I try to let all of my problems flow out through my eyes.
But that only makes it worse.
It blurs my vision.
I cannot see where I am going
or what I am doing.
I mess up the few good things I have in my life.
I have someone to make me laugh and smile
then I mess it up.
But when someone comes along that does me wrong and breaks my heart,
I do everything I can to keep them.
I wonder why I do the stupid things that I do. . .