The Slight Reliability


Measured in what?

In seconds/minutes/months/years/who we are

Versus who we were

Versus how long it has been

Since the orange creep was elected into office

Since this sad excuse for politics led to a loss of friends

Because while no, your political views do not start hatred for you in my heart

But your acceptance of hatred and your wish to give it power

Absolutely do because I cannot

Support you, nor can I let myself have friends

Whom I cannot support

Since I left home and made

A new one for myself at school

Where I have friends and my own makeshift family

Which is more than I’ve ever had here

Since I decided to stop mending my broken,

Always broken relationship with my father

Because his abuse cannot hold me here

Now that I can spend so much of the year away

And I legally do not have to follow his rules any longer

Since friends I thought were more than that proved to be

Only a high school situation

And now that we are no longer thrown together

Sitting in desks only an empty aisle apart

We do not speak

And it is apparently too much to receive a text back

Let alone a real reason why

Since my depression sparked up again

Leaving me hopeless and hurting

Over and over again

Who knows how many times this year?

Was it really one year? It felt like three

And how can I ever know for sure

When I cannot sleep because time slows

Down, down, down as though it has stopped

But I can see everything and everyone moving around me

What has changed? Or rather, what is that--

Change? New obstacles do not feel new

Just the same issue in another form

Because some things never do

This poem is about: 


Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741