Self Loathing

They start from the moment i wake up

“You piece of shit”                               “go kill yourself”

            “Your pathetic”                                                                          “why are you so ugly”


“Pig”                            “nobody likes you”   “you attention seeker”

        “Slit your fucking wrists”                                                        “you have no friends”

                                             “Noone will ever love you”           

“Freak”                            “fuck up”                         “cow”

They pound on my head

                                         Screaming at me

                                                                         To get out of bed

But i can’t move                                          because

What's the point?

                                      I have nothing to live for

                                                                                      Why should i?

I have to plead with myself to throw off the blanket

Debate whether or not brushing my teeth is worth it

And if todays the day i end it

And they taunt me the whole time

                                                             “Stop getting the wrong answer”

“It's just 5 dishes!”                  “can you do anything right?”


           “Lazy ass”                                    

And when i finally go to bed

They continue to depreciate me 

         “You got nothing done today”                                                  “you shouldn't even be alive”

                                      “please don't wake up tomorrow” 

They never stop

They never leave me alone

Yelling at me

Putting me down

Strangling my self worth

Not that i have any

This ficking self loathing

I want it to stop. 


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