My Pandora's Box (I Can't)

My mind thinks too much

And yet, i can't think, can't eat, sleep, breathe

I feel a Pandora's box inside

I can't let those emotions out, not now

But I can't keep them in, can't let them win

I can't run outside, I'm not allowed

I can't vent I haven't got the time

But I keep wasting it trying to help my mental health

Talking to friends who just get me pissed off

Could it be that in my endeavor to help I'm making things worse?

If so can I stop the cycle?

Not much else to do. Got a million homework assignments

I can feel myself getting behind by the second

The guilt is weighing down heavily

But the hatred is so deep

The panicked energy flows through my veins

But I can't move, I can't get it out

Call it what you will, anxiety maybe?

I don't know, but I can't talk about it

My friend'll get mad if I tell them their pissing me off

I can't talk to a counselor because they wouldn't understand

Anyone who would understand won't understand everything

So I'm left to take care of this box on my own

Trying not to let it all out

But I have no way to ease it out, no way to vent

My vents, my drawing, my music, my poems

Nothing's working, it's all not working

I'm not working, I don't function properly

My brain  is over-thinking, over-analyzing, over-doing everything

I should probably eat, sleep, take a shower, take care of me

But everything just leaves me with this over-energetic lack of energy

I'm not depressed, this is different

I know I'm strong, I'm Overcomer, I believe in myself

But this feeling is something too new

I don't know what to do, I can't even think of rhymes

Something that comes so naturally when I write

I can't even write in couplet, everything is freeverse

But I can't let myself by free of my box,  isn't it ironic?

I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't

I know that's all you hear, but what can I do?

I don't know if I can do this

This poem is about: 
Me
Poetry Terms Demonstrated: 

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741