My Fill

Every part of me desires to be your lover and best friend.

But how can I be your lover when your actions speak “my enemy”, not “friend to me.”

My heart's broken, writing helps me wash my sins, allowing my soul to mend.

Life's too short, we're grown ups, no time to play childish games or pretend.

 

This feels like a bad dream, nightmare even,it has to be unreal

Took us breaking up, I left the city, to seal the deal.

For too long my hungry heart fed on lies for meals. 

No room for sorrow to wallow in, no tears left, the ocean is overfilled

I’ve been lost and misguided, led by evil and my fears.

Confused and bewildered, how the F*** did I get here?

 

I can’t trust you, when I don't trust myself, at times not even Our Father himself.

I can’t love you, without loving the unfamiliar stranger within myself.

Been on this dark path for far too long, lost the sight of my wealth. 

Was going backwards, treading water, with you I'm drowning myself.

 

So much has been said, much more has been done or left undone.

I don’t want to play anymore, it's not fair, this game is no fun 

I give up, I fold, we lost, but you won, we’re over, we done

This love left me empty, no family, no friends, not even myself, no one.

 

This is my truth, no need for anyone to validate how I feel, I know what's real.

No one believes me, they are committed to the lies, regardless of what’s real.

No pity party, I'm no victim, I served myself this nasty meal. 

Bite after bite a bitter pill to taste, but I have finally had my fill.

 

This poem is about: 
Me
My family

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