Dear Broken-Hearted Girl,

 

I remember seeing you, lying there in the darkness of your room

I remember watching the tears fall and listening to your stifled sobs

As you tried your best to keep from waking your family

I remember the struggle to get up the next morning

I remember your puffy eyes and the dark circles that somehow highlighted

The pain that you experienced.

I remember the sinking feeling that you felt

I could see it on your face

As you stood face-to-face with heartbreak

Day after day, smiling and laughing along with him, trying to make him happy

Despite the fact that you were nothing more than crumbling ruin inside

 

I remember the day you walked away from him

And it hurt for a while

(it more than hurt, it stung to the very roots of your heart, it burned you so badly that you retreated further into yourself than you ever have.  But that’s the risk that comes with your first young love).

I remember how you healed

And you healed because you tried to

You made an effort

And the waves that had hit you when the hurt first began

Became fewer and far between.  

You smiled every once in awhile, genuinely.  

You learned that happiness had never rested in his arms

Safety had never come from his smile.  

And even though you still hoped and dreamed that things were different,

You began to stand up and allow yourself to be okay.  

 

I remember the first day of junior year,

You came back better than ever before

You were prepared, you were ready, and you were unafraid

Your smile was absolutely radiant, as if a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders

And you no longer remained a slave to the heartbreak that had tethered you down for so long.  

I remember how you blossomed

How you grew into your individuality, how you learned to live with the idea of not needing another

How you became not just the counterpart of another,

But a complete whole version of yourself

I remember how you accepted metamorphosis as a part of human life

The good, and the bad all in one

You embraced what you had once dreaded

And you were now better than you had ever been

The thoughts of him were few, if any

And you do not miss the sweet nothings he whispered into your ear

You do not miss the late night promises and the dreams you had held close to your heart

Because when you let them go,

You created more room

For the love of yourself.  

 

To my past self,

And my ever-growing present self,

I am proud of what you have become

Through what you have overcome.  

 

Sincerely,

Me.