Life's all about the little ironies

And taking them at face value

We wipe our brows, grin at chance

Bracing against fatigue and famine,

Peering across the dunes that is our system

And laughing at the mirage of torridity

It looks just like water!

Then we drop into the sands and melt away,

Giggling like schoolgirls at how it's not water at all.

Just another little irony.

Work hard in high school,

And wipe your brow

Here, have some busywork

And wittle away your life

College won't be like this

And you won't be ready

And you'll be sucked into your dorm-desk

Swallowed up and laughing and laughing

At another little cruel irony.

I'm liable to be bed-pressed by Uncle Sam

The little harlot of the government

Good thing I have the district's views

Investment is just a sexy word for corporate conglomerates

Good thing I know Pythagoras and Ulysses

And I'll vote how you want me to, if ever

And I'll be preyed upon by the world about me

Then we laugh and laugh at the little ironies

You want to know what you do?

Nothing a robot can't

Megatron can assign textbooks

A photocopier has plenty of handouts

R2-D2's accent isn't so thick as yours anyway

Think you're here for the hapless children?

Have a heart, Tin Man, and back off.

Go about your day, laughing at the little ironies

You could actually try, you know

Make a college prep class 

A little more like a college class

No, that's okay

Push me through the system

Just watch as our nation implodes

As education is lengthened in expediency and ineptitude

While we laugh and laugh at the cruel little ironies.