Inside Maine's Mind

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I am but a young soul 
 
born into the darkest place on earth
 
i am but a young soul 
 
so fragile that everything that touches me hurts
 
i am nothing that i thought that i would be, 
 
at the age of fifteen
 
but i take these, 
 
dark days and prey to god 
 
because i do know what they mean
 
could it be, 
 
i am just a pawn it the lives and schemes of others
 
the unwanted sibling of my brothers? 
 
the mistake of my mother? 
 
could it be, 
 
i can here just to see 
 
the punishments of every other
 
tortured bastard in the same situation as me?
 
I am discriminated and hate by anyone with a conscience
 
family or not
 
left and forgot
 
i am "black with an attitude" 
 
but most  are those who hate me
 
don't even worry about the last three
 
words in the phrase 
 
i am amazed 
 
at the limited amount of tolerance others have
 
for a being as bright as me, 
 
being that i don't hate other for being them, you see?
 
i have no release, no way to allow
 
energy building up inside of me out
 
without drawing a crowd
 
i am sad 
 
inside is outside down 
 
but outside angry with no frown
 
feeling like mixed feelings and ignorance is where i'm bound
 
most of the time
 
i won't even write it down
 
aside from being dyslexic, 
 
seeing hard times a paper leaves lower than the ground
 
that i stand on, 
 
sounds ironic to me when i say it
 
because i don't feel like i have any foundation in my life to keep me motivated
 
except for one girl, 
 
one lasting light in this blindingly dark tunnel
 
my world, my all and my everything 
 
who deals with ill minded little ol' me, 
 
willingly
 
can't you see planet earth? 
 
All i need
 
is some room to be made for Jermaine
 
where my past can stay behind me
 
and all of the misfortune and pain that i have 
 
unfortunately endured over these
 
past 20 years,
 
I'll drop all my fears 
 
and no more tears
 
as soon as the abundant  fortune love and affection is assured
 
i guess until then my mind will rot of thought of better days that i feel i could never see
 
as long as this helpless reflection looks back at me
 
i am but a young soul 
 
trapped in the darkest place on earth
 
who will remain trapped 
 
until he put down effort and hard hard work 
 
I will be more than what i thought i could
 
and if i should ever spot another me in this dark place
 
I'd tell him to use his little light as his saving grace.

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