Some people hide their depression
their sorrow, pain, and loneliness
behind a forced smile.
One that's not genuine.
What about me?
And I one of those people?
I have a smile,
a smile that sometimes might be a little too wide,
but it is real, nonetheless.
I don't hide any scars on my body,
except for the ones I've acquired
on my many adventures.
I don't hide a fear that I am too fat,
or that I am too tall,
or that I am ugly,
like many teens do.
But everyone hides something
I am no exception.
What do I hide?
What is something nobody knows about me?
What don't I announce to the world?
Why do I need to put myself in the limelight
and take attention away from those who really need it?
People who have nothing, who are struggling to survive.
Why would I want people to treat me any differently?
To think that I am too good for them,
or that I know too much and am so smart
just because I went to the International Science and Engineering Fair,
when I don't even know how I made it there.
People try to justify my past to make themselves feel better:
“Oh, the only reason you won that scholarship is
Because you're a minority and
I'm just white”
People feel intimidated by me.
Why would I want any of that?
I just want a normal life,
to fit in with people my age.
This won't stop me from pursuing my passions.
It's only that,
Nobody needs to know that I am applying to Yale
that I won a $10,000 scholarship,
that I pass every test,
volunteer at the state archives,
knit and sew my own things,
Nobody needs to know that.
It doesn't concern them.
It's my life, as busy as it is,
And I love it.
But I still want to have the life of a normal teen.
So I hide most of it behind a curtain.
Out of sight, out of mind
So I blend in with the rest.