I am Working

I am working.

Don't bother me right now.

I don't want to be mean,

But there are priorities,

They determine how much I can care about something.

Right now, work is my prioroty,

And you aren't.

I am sorry

I can't be more open to you,

I am always working

Towards my end goal,

And then what,

After I reach it,

After I've accomplished it?

I am hoping

You'll still be there for me,

To listen to me, because a lot of times,

There's no one but me.

I am alone

But I'm not.

My head can get pretty loud at times,

My inner voice screaming into the void,

That cry pushing out from the inside.

But all the while

I am quiet.

Most of the interesting things I say in my head,

Most of them have already been said by much smarter people.

I am overly dramatic

Or possibly psychotic,

At times, it's hard to tell which.

But one thing is certain:

I am so self-derrogatory,

I always feel the need to bring myself down a level

Even if I'm at the bottom.

Its hard for me to speak possitively about myself

My accomplishments,

By my own measure,

They are nothing,

I am nothing.

Nothing at all.

Nothing special about me.

To set me apart.

I am overreactive.

When I panic, I make idiotic mistakes, for which I kick myself repeatedly.

I am lazy.

How many more scholarships could I get if I sat down and wrote a few lousy essasys?

I am judgemental of others.

When anyone does anything, I immediately criticize them, mentally.

I am a terrible person,

According to my own judgement.

But to go by this one authority,

I am wrong.

I have no reason to do that to myself.

I am smart.

I state the obvious, but my teachers tell me that nothing is obvious to everyone.

I am creative.

When inspiration revives my mind, I can see an epic unfold behind my eyes.

I am caring.

When people need someone, I know I can't help them, but I find someone who can,

And they've let me know that that has helped.

I am more

Than what I give myself credit for.

I am loved

By everyone I know,

They are happy to know me.

I make their days better, however I can.

Here is where I would usually cut myself down.

Minimize who I am,

But not this time.

This time,

I am accepting that

I am a good person

Who puts others before himself.

I must never forget

I am a good person

Who treats everyone with respect.

Why should I care what I think?

I am happy

To know that

I am a good person.

I am also a good worker.

So I'd better get back to work.

I am busy.

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