I am Growing up...

Not such a good thing, in the eyes of others...

A red headed little girl not living with her mother, not knowing her brothers,

Sisters, and mom's sleeping around with other misters.

I am a broken home...

Parents were never together, but mom had a thing for dad.

It was all quite kind of sad.

 

At that time I couldn't quite understand, why a mother would have to steal pots and pans.

Not to provide but to get high.

Living in a shelter in the Bronx, but not feeling sheltered at all...

I was just waiting for the next man to fall.

The love shared in the shelter wasn't like any other... felt just like it was coming from any mother

 

As I got older things changed, but not all for the better...

Most of the times eyes and pillows got wetter...

I am the early years

A book you'd never want to read

But yet the pages seem to be tattered and torn

The spine is battered and worn.

I am a bad book.

 

A book you'd never want to share

For only you see the meaning behind it.

Every page tells a story

And you’re the only one that grasps every single word.

For I’m a bad book.

Upon the first page your eyes start to water

As a picture of a little girl begging for a quarter from her mother

Crack pipe in hand

Money was of no issue but it caused one

Soon after the mother left.

Even through all of this a man,

Throughout tears and cheers was always there.

Just to make her smile and care for his

Emotionally fragile child

 

I am my father

For his love was always there.

I am his smile, which was always wide.

I am his everything, his joy and pride.

 

I am the streets of New York

The scraps and scars of its people.

I am the corner liquor stores and subways

I am the many streets and buildings

 

But after some years

I became the southern grass of Georgia

The long highways and winding dirt roads

I became one county with many little streets and stores

I became a mature young adult

Still hoping to find the other half of me

I became trouble

I became broken and battered

I became hurt and love

I became me.