How different it is to go from one place and be so invisible, then to come to another and suddenly be the bell-of-the-ball. I remember wanting the attention and admiration of some many not too long ago, to now I have it- but why do I suddenly feel as if I am a creature always on display with nowhere to go, forced to constantly meet others standards. I want to defy people, but standing out any more seems like it is so much effort I will crumble beneath the pressure. I have lost so many I care about, I do not want to continue losing people. I have a heart so full of pain and it has been repaired so many times I fear for it to fall apart even one more time would be the end for me. You can only mend something so many times before it is tattered beyond repair and then some. What do you do when your heart is this object? What happens when it begins to crumble again? I do believe that, without a doubt, this will be the end of me. I will not survive another heartbreak, of any kind. I have so much still left to give but maybe my time is coming up and I must accept this fate. To those who feel as I do, to those who are on the same path, turn around now and run as fast and as far from this destination as possible. It is much too late for me, I hear the whispers, I feel the hot yet gentle hands gripping my limbs and tugging me, feel the darkness taking over my vision - I know I am dying. As much as I would like to see you all, to meet so many new faces, it is not fair to you. Spend as much time as you can here, you fools with huge hearts brimming and overflowing with love and care and sincerity. The world needs you, each and every one of you and then some, there are not enough caring individuals like yourselves. Please do not be so frivolous as I, or be even more, spread yourself throughout every inch of this globe and don't stop. You are saving so many people and you lovely fool you realize not the impact you have. You can not save everyone you know? I found this out, maybe it was too late, or more likely I just did not want to listen and believe such cruel words, I have tried and will continue till my last breath to save everyone. Sometimes I do wish I would save myself, but I think that would be a bit selfish, I am here for a purpose, it is not to live for long though. I wish for those this message will reach, I wish so much for this, that you take the time to save yourself before you get so engrossed with others. If nothing else, make this life count, and in the next continue the work you had not the time to finish before. I have never been good at goodbyes, it is why I have always preferred to use the less permanent phrase of See you later, or Until next time. Now feels like the time to say goodbye though.
With all the love I have left to give, Me