Gone Too Soon

Why does it seem like God takes the good people early?
It was not until he called you that I realized I had something amazing all along.
Maybe it was because I was so young; and I could not trust the fact that a boy my age cared for me in a way that words can't explain.
Maybe if I would have let it happen I would not be writing this right now; but I keep telling myself it's too late to be saying "maybe", "I should have", because you've been gone almost five years.
Wow time goes by fast, it still plays in my mind like it happened yesterday and my tears are still fresh like it happened yesterday.
I guess this is what they mean by when they say "you don't know what you have until it's gone".
But I find myself asking "if I treated you better would I still be holding on so tight"?
And I also ask myself "will the guilt ever go away"?
I know you wouldn't want me doing this to myself, but I can't help it.... I'm human.
So I pray for your forgiveness and for God to bless me with his strength so I can leave the past where it belongs.
I know your soul is resting in peace but it was still too soon; I was ready to watch you accomplish your goals but the man above had different plans, and all I can do is accept that.
At least now, I know better. I cherish the ones I love, more and I don't let a day go by without telling them how I feel.
Maybe that was his plan all along.


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If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741