I dont think it ever mattered to me.
It never mattered how I use to take care of you when you should have been taking care of me.
It never mattered that I would wear hand-me downs as you strutted down the street.
It never mattered how I felt to be worthless inside because you chose him over me.
But what did matter was when I felt completely decived.
I had no idea why I had been the one to take care of you, or why we had no money for me, or why you stayed with a man so ignorant and self intrigued.
I had not realized the pain I was in until I grew up and recognized all your sins.
Many say forgive but never forget but I was to younge to understand what that meant.
I had never forgave and lived a life of hate
but soon forgot when I was awoken at 5 o'clock.
The news we all would dread.
I was alone with my thoughts just laying still, in bed.
It came time for me to realize I should have forgave you for all you had done.
Because you were my mother and I only had one.
Amber R. Carrasco